The lie counter.

Criticism of the March 5th, 2010 blog post entitled “The Fountain of Kade”:

Being The Brand and the man that will be the biggest celebrity and award winning actor and author in the world
Lie #1.

can definitely have it’s perks like gorgeous vagina thrown at you from every angle,
Even though you don’t end up sleeping with them. Yeah, way to take advantage of those “perks.”

“Mega Bizzers” calling you from KA every week hoping to work with or represent you
Lie #2.

having a Hit TV Show with IMG Media and NY Times Bestseller with Trident Media Group happening soon
Lie #3.

I said, “Man, I am so lonely. I haven’t met a nice girl that I wanted to date in forever
Gee, I wonder why! Surely it has nothing to do with your charming personality!

“”Smuts”" (This is a term one friend created which is a combination of “Slut” and “Mut” which describes girls with no self respect who sleep around who everyone hates or makes fun of, and are dumb as a doornail because they have no idea why or are in denial, whom he called, “The Lowest form of life imaginable”)
Kade, this is a P-E-R-F-E-C-T description….of you. You CLAIM to have slept with tons of women (supermodels, if I remember correctly), you have no self-respect (or shame or dignity or self-awareness), almost everyone hates you (comments section: yours AND ours), you’re DUMBER than a doornail (why would anyone put a nail in a door, anyway, besides as a makeshift hook) and you are in denial about being Gen-Pop like the lot of us (check out the floor of Chateau Kade for proof of this because REAL celebrities have things called DRESSERS AND OTHER TYPES OF FURNITURE IN WHICH TO STORE THEIR CLOTHES).

have made me lose my faith in humanity in this city
Some Philadelphia locals have made the same comment when talking about you and why no one in the City of Brotherly Love has given you a good ol’ Philly beatdown.

We decided to have The Brand make a celeb appearance at The Black Eyed Peas
Lie #4. Going to a concert does NOT mean you’re making a “celeb appearance.” And who is this “we”? Nowhere in the five videos that you posted does the viewer see any of your Nontourage. There is evidence that someone (besides yourself) was filming the third video (entitled “Security Won’t High 5 The Brand”) and POSSIBLY the fifth (entitled “Fergie Smiles At The Brand”), but other than that (and a picture taken of you gesturing towards a picture of Frank Sinatra), there is no clear indication that you had anyone with you that night.

we stood under Fergie for much of the concert where I noticed she was staring at The Brand
Lie #5. Standing “under” her would indicate that you were AT THE FRONT OF THE STAGE. Upon inspection of the pictures you took of the concert (isn’t there some rule at concerts that specifies “no photography allowed”?), it is clear (to me, at least) that you were at least 40 feet (480 inches) from the tip of the stage. Note: zooming in with your camera does not mean you were any closer to the stage than you actually were. Plus, with all the bright lights on her, it was no doubt almost impossible to see you specifically from where she was standing. Nice try, though! I think you said that either as a joke or to goad your haters into attacking you.

and thought she may bring me up for a “Celeb Shout Out” to the Wachovia Center, but it was so hot up front, and the performance so disappointing that I had to move to the back then bail early and skip partying with the band at the after party at Voyeur
Lie #6. In neither video (“On The Floor” or “Fergie Smiles At The Brand”) did you say that ANY performance by ANY artist that night was disappointing.

Kade, if ANYONE in that stadium TRULY THOUGHT you were a celebrity, then you would have posted pictures/video of “The Fan Who Approached Me At The Black Eyed Peas Concert.” Also, if you were as big a celebrity as you think you are, you would have been backstage or watching the concert from behind the curtains, partying it up with the performers and their crews…but as it stands, you are Gen Pop (this is clearly shown by your position “On The Floor”).

to support my girl Fergie (She is a KA 7.44 with a “Frisbee Face” (A super round face that looks like a Wham-O Frisbee with a very toned little body although she needs implants and way less collagen and botox because she looks like a wax figure now, and she has got to be careful that my buddy Josh Duhamel doesn’t kick her to the curb)
Lie #7. You don’t have any pictures of yourself standing with Josh Duhamel, so he could not possibly be your “buddy.” And, like the descriptions of other women on the “Kade Scale”, this criticism of Fergie will most likely bite you in the future.

Even The Brand believes in some form of the concept of “Love”
Lie #8.

hopes to one day find it without the girl wanting him just as a “Piece of Meat” or “Eight Figure Per Movie” actor who they can use for fame or money,
The way you talk about “Vagina” gives your readers the impression that all you see when you look at a woman is a “Piece of Meat.”

being Arthur Kade and especially being the biggest name in Philly, every girl is counting all of your future earnings.
Lie #9. I can probably find more “future earnings” under the cushions of my couch right now.

(This week was insane because The Brand was in NYC 3 days in and out of meetings like a celeb of my caliber should be, and I am actually looking forward to a weekend in Philadelphia to dekadepress)
The “celeb” of your “caliber” is simply your ballooned state of mind. Also, how many other celebrities did you see taking public transit to and from NYC?

one of The Entourage suggested I stop by my old stomping ground of Neiman Marcus
Neiman Marcus? That reminds me of a comment someone left on your Snapvine voicemail…
“...yet, I’m pretty sure you used to sell my boyfriend clothes at Neiman Marcus and you used to suck him out to make sales…”
http://www.snapvine.com/message/show/21377413

we grabbed din with 3 of the models
If you’re going to shorten words like “dinner”, you might as well shorten “model” as well (to “mod”). You are the jackass of the literary world.

the only thing that kept her from a 9.9 or 10 was that I wish was a bit more outgoing
Possible reason she wasn’t more outgoing? She’s most likely heard of you and doesn’t want to give you the impression that she’s interested.

((Arthur Kade is not Douchey because almost all girls want him and he has turns down more sex in a week than Gen Poppers get in a decade)))
Lies #10 and #11. You ARE “Douchey.” It’s said that the average American male has sex once a week, and if that’s true then that’s 520 times in 10 years…which would mean, by your claim, you’re turning down that “gorgeous vagina thrown at you” 74.29 times a day. Riiiiiiiiiight.

I truly understand why older men gravitate to younger girls because outside of them being more beautiful, in better shape, and less jaded than the 30+ crowd (Which in Philadelphia is equivalent to suicide if you’re not married)
You’re over 30 and not married. Shouldn’t you suicide yourself now? And what of your friends, Sabrina Strickland and Linsday Furman? THEY are over 30 and not married! Is your statement somehow critical of them, or do you exclude them simply because they’re your friends?

The Brand lives like a 21 year old, “Sinatra-esque” life
Lie #12.

I responded, “I am the youngest and most happening guy in this room,
Lie #13.

and it is because I surround myself with only gorgeous 21-25 year old girls”

Again, I refer you to Sabrina Strickland and Lindsay Furman, who are over 30 (and whom you have been photographed with numerous times, some very recently). Also, if one were to take a look at your blog and see this…
(from the March 1st, 2010 blog post entitled “The University Of Pennsylvania Releases An “Unauthorized Documentary” About Arthur Kade”)
…one would be VERY reluctant to assume that the woman in the middle (with the black hair) is between 21 and 25.

and is “The Face Of Philadelphia”

Lie #14. There is no magazine that claims this, and a Google image search does not produce any pictures of you.

the real question for me is now will I want to ever grow old with a 9/10, or will Arthur Kade always be looking to drink from the “Fountain Of Kade”?

Do you mean that you’ll eventually be a balding old man who will be “making comments about Complainant's breasts, telling Complainant that she would be good in bed, telling

Complainant that he would personally perform an abortion if she became pregnant, calling Complainant a "bitch", touching Complainant's rear end, placing his arms around Complainant, placing his hands in Complainant's pockets, rubbing up against Complainant, and repeatedly poking Complainant in the shoulder”? Your dad certainly seemed to want to drink from “The Fountain”, so much so that he went to court because of it! (See http://www.aopc.org/OpPosting/CWealth/out/327CD06_1-25-07.pdf)

“It Isn’t cheating if it’s getting “”Kaded” by The Brand. It’s discovering Nirvana”…

Yes, I’m sure all the ladies out there were simply DYING to find an excuse to sleep with you, Creepy Von Hopeless; thankfully your sex-driven, fame-driven mind is running overtime to help them.

Criticism of the March 7th, 2010 blog post entitled “ChatRoulette.com (GawKade Covers The Brand’s Penn Documentary And Black Eyed Peas Concert Appearance)”:

“I should be there supporting all of my friends and peers, but I am not going until Arthur Kade has earned the right to be there and stand at that podium”

So, in other words, you’ll never be going?

what I will wear in front of the world when I collect my first of many “Lil’ Oscars”, and the fab speech that Arthur Kade will deliver (I practice it all the time in the car while driving, and it will bring the Gen Pop to tears when I thank my grandmother in Russian)

Lie #15. You won’t be collecting even one Oscar, let alone many. Also, I doubt that the Gen Pop will be brought to tears when you thank your grandmother in Russian because a large amount of the American population DOES NOT SPEAK ANY RUSSIAN! Now, if you were speaking Spanish, you’d probably be understood by a great deal of them…

the Congratulations that The Brand will receive from Bobby DeNiro, Danny Day Lewis, Jen Aniston, Gerry Butler, Eddie Murphy, Annie Hathaway, and Meryl Streep (I was telling a friend last night, “I wonder If I should have the presenter announce me as “Arthur Kade” or as “The Brand”)

Why did you shorten some, and not all of, their names? Ed Murphy, An Hathaway and Mer Streep would have shown consistency. I think if Meryl Streep DID announce you as “The Brand” she would barely be able to keep a straight face…nevermind the fact that she’d be close to 100 by that point.

The Entourage and Gen Poppers made me feel so much better about everything because they reminded me that with a Hit TV Show and NY Times Bestseller on the way

Lies #16 and 17.

and crazy Balls Ass meetings

Balls Ass meetings! Are you getting into porn, or did you remember the #1 rule in showbusiness (“Work the shaft”) while on that casting couch?

for anyone who doesn’t know you, it will be awesome”

It sure will be, because they’ll be completely surprised when an unknown assclown walks up to them and blabbers about how he’s the next big thing in “”””””The Biz.”””’’

“The Journey” is light years ahead of what anyone has ever dreamed

Especially for us, because we Gen Poppers have such low expectations of you and “Duh Gurney.”

I went home with a girl to have some fun

Poor girl. I bet the definitions you two have of “fun” are quite different.

since I am now a Global M.I.M. ((Mogul In The Making)) and celebrity

Lie #18.

check out this website, ChatRoulette.com” (This is a website where you jump on and are directed to random Gen Poppers around the world who are also on the site…so I jumped on the site, and here are the hilarious results

“Hilarious” indeed. No one fucking knew who in the fucking fuck you were, you stupid fuck.

and the Link To The GawKade (Gawker.com which is Arthur Kade’s Personal International Celebrity Tabloid At this point) article covering the controversial and groundbreaking Documentary that the University Of Pennsylvania did on The Brand which will be discussed by the Gen Pop for years to come
August 10th, 2023:
Gen Popper (GP) 1: Dude! I was searching the HotchickswithDouchebags archives…do you know who Arthur Kade is?
GP2: …Arthur Kade? Sounds familiar. Oh yeah! He’s that Philly famewhore that tried to make it in Hollywood with his blog and being on a reality show. I remember him! I used to comment on his stupid posts once in awhile. He even had this movie made about him! I think it was some university guys who did a documentary on him.
GP1: What happened to him? Did he make it?
GP2: No idea. After about a year I got bored with the whole thing and never went back to his site…except for once, but it said that his site was closed down.
GP1: Oh…..So hey, about tomorrow, before the Black eyed peas reunion concert…

I could tell that she was totally blown away meeting The Brand in person as everyone else is
Lie #19.

“It’s one thing to watch porn on TV, but when you actually get to experience a REAL porn star, it’s a million times more exciting,
Lie #20. You’re not a porn star.

people read the blog, but then they see how dynamic, good looking, charming, and BIG I am in real life and go nuts
Lies 21, 22, 23, 24 and 25. Just because Kevin McDonald was excited to meet you in person doesn’t mean that everyone else is, too. And don’t exaggerate it to be that way.

Meeting “The Lebron James Of Japan” who’s name I can’t remember because he is a MMA fighter who is as big over there as A-Rod Or Lebron are here (He couldn’t speak English so he had a full time interpreter with him who absolutely loved when The Brand said, “I have a Hit TV Show Coming Out, and am going to be HUGE in Japan as well, so let’s exchange info so we can party in Tokyo with some hot Geishas when I make appearances over there)
Lies #26 and 27. You will not be huge in Japan, nor will you “make an appearance” over there. You can TRAVEL there, and since (at this time) one American dollar is equivalent to 90.5698 Japanese Yen (http://www.xe.com/ucc/convert.cgi?Amount=1&From=USD&To=JPY&image.x=56&image.y=13) you may be able to hang around for awhile…which is great, because if you blog about partying Kade Style in The house of the rising sun, that will be a great tip-off for people to break into your apartment and ransack your shit.

we even filmed a vid of him showing me some “Kade Style” wrestling maneuvers that I could use to get over zealous fans away if they stalk or attack me, but the vid came out to dark so I am not posting it.
But you posted this video? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_ZjIOYV0JU'
And this one? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQEKCFzyHmw
And this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ol9XMoQXULs
AND THIS? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tUKM6pRo7M
I think the following quote was from a Seinfeld episode…
“YOU STUPID, STUPID SILLY MAN!”

for guys that can totally destroy anyone of us with one punch or kick, they all couldn’t have been sweeter
Men don’t use words like “sweeter” when talking about other men. Masculine fail for you.

The Girl that I went home with on Friday after Recess told me when we were already naked in her house, “I hate sharing the bed with someone else, and I get up early like 7AM, so you will need to leave then”, and I laughed and said, “Good luck getting me out of the house at 7AM”, but sure enough, she woke The Brand up at 6:45AM and asked me to leave, and when I said, “Are you serious? I am still drunk and can’t move”, she responded, “I hate having people in my bed so yes I am serious”, so Arthur Kade got dressed and went home. I told one of The Entourage, “I guess I didn’t do a good enough job with her”.
That means “I didn’t use enough Rohypnol on her.”

I said ” Are you kidding me. I’m Arthur Kade and I am not a slut. Girls just want me to be with me and my penis. Am I supposed to say No to them?”.
Lies #28 and 29. Usually, it’s them saying no to you (unless you used a significant quantity of GHB).

Eating at my “Fave” restaurant in Philadelphia, Buddakan
Note to all Gen Poppers who may want to interrupt Arthur Kade in the future to ask him for his autograph.

It’s great being the “Face Of Philadelphia”, but also one of the “Future Biggest Names in “”The Biz”"”, because Arthur Kade is catered to like the King Of England in Philadelphia.
Lies #30 and 31.

“You aren’t a celebrity when you get preferential treatment. You are a celebrity when the celebrities give you preferential treatment, and want you to sleep with their wives or girlfriends”…
Surely you can QUOTE some of these celebrities who want you to sleep with their wives or girlfriends? Otherwise you’d be, y’know, MAKING SHIT UP.

Criticism of the March 11th, 2010 blog post entitled “Arthur Kade Heads To Hollywood To Meet With Major TV Networks”:

Like many amazing, great spiritual, symbolic leaders and pioneers before him, such as Moses who led The Jews out of Egypt and Christopher Columbus who sailed across The Atlantic, the time has now come for the illustrious and “One of Hollywood’s fastest Rising Names and Actors/Authors”, Arthur Kade, and IMG Media to head to the mecca of “The Biz”, Hollywood in Kade Angeles, and conduct meetings and negotiations with the various TV Networks that have reviewed the Hit Show that we have been creating for the last 6 months, and these multiple TV Networks have now requested to actually meet The Brand in person and see that “The Kadeicorn” (The nickname given to me in a prior post by a rabid Female Kade Nation Member who compared my stature in Philadelphia to that of a mythical worshipped creature called a Unicorn) is indeed real, and take “The Journey” to the next step of it’s “Odyssey-Like” greatness.
Lies #32, 33, 34, 35 and 36. You’re probably going to Los Angeles because you found a cattle call on Actor’s Access. Either that or your parents have some property there too (like they do in Florida). Here’s a comment from Kudos from the November 30th, 2009 blog post entitled “Business And Pleasure In Miami”

Kudos on 01 Dec 2009 at 3:09 am
This wasn’t hard to figure out…Klispy the wonder douche never does anything on his own. He always rides along then claims he was a-list and it was part of the journey. The pattern is unmistakable. Here’s the kicker…L/e/oni/d K/a/dy/sh/es and R/ai/sa Y K/ad/ys/hes had an apt. (In a high-rise) in Hal/lan/da/le, FL.
They sold that unit then Le/on/id bought another unit (w/2 other ‘partners’) in the same building. The douche master general is just going down to Flo/rid/a with his dad and step mom and (as usual) is talking like he’s doing something and he’s somebody. Sad little douche, always talking about girls he’s never had, things he’s never done, places he’s never been and lying about it all. He had to be the worst child ever and hasn’t changed a bit. Do a goggle search for Lo/en/id Ka/d/ys/hes…not to many hits on that name.

We are being told that The Brand is the toast of the town right now amongst these major networks, and the “Buzz” (The term we “Bizzers” use to describe when a concept or product like a movie/TV script or Prized award winning actor like Arthur Kade is “Ultra-Hot” in Hollywood) surrounding my Hit Number 1 show is deafening, and judging by the response of the major networks who want to meet, evaluate, and get to know The Brand who will be the face of Hollywood for years to come, this trip which will be March 22-25 will be EPIC in helping shape and mold the future of the history of television programming.
Lies #37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42 and 43. Mold the FUTURE of the HISTORY of television? Are you on glue or what?

talking about how his “Brand” will shape the minds of future generations and re-write the history books and win Emmy’s for years to come because there has never been anything like this concept on TV..
Lies #44, 45 and 46. You’re definitely going to shape the minds of future generations, all right. “Man, I sure hope I don’t grow up to be a deluded fuckhole like him,” Little Timmy thought. I don’t doubt there has never been anything like a reality show about a fame-whoring douchebag on TV because TV executives have been smart enough to shy away from stuff like that…although, with the programs out there nowadays, the bottom of the barrel is getting closer and closer, and you know what that means: calling Arthur Kade!

I am a star of in both my experience, performances, and feedback to young rising students who look to The Brand for guidance
Lies #47, 48, 49 and 50. They look to you to know what to AVOID when they perform!

“It is one thing to get to know Arthur Kade while reading my famous blog that millions have read, and following “”The Journey”" through the mainstream celebrity media that is obsessed with me, but when I am in a room, the effect that I have on people is unheard of. I am bigger than life in person with a level of charm, intrigue, honesty, confidence, and electricity than anyone Gen Poppers can imagine
Lies #51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59 and 60. Gen Poppers can imagine quite a bit. Don’t think so highly of yourself until you’ve read some history and seen what the average person can come up with by simply using their imagination.

I had one girl say to me last night, “After hearing you just talk to your friend, you have a certain sensitivity and humility that I didn’t imagine you having just from reading your blog and being a fan. It really creates this aura that people want to be around you and makes you much more likeable although I still kinda’ hate you. You really do have a “”Star”" Quality to you”
She said that EXACTLY? Those exact words? Did you write it down or did you ask her to? Was it on camera? Why not show that footage to us haters? And no, you don’t have a star quality to you; you have an “”Idiot”" quality to you that creates an aura (much as laughing gas creates an aura) that makes people want to be around you to get a load of how much of an introverted, autistic, young-man’s-mind-in-an-adult’s-body cracker you are.

“Why do you think I land all the girls? It’s not just my great smile
Lies #61 and 62.

and much more impressive looking as well
Lie #63.

(Kade Nation will remember when Danny Bonaduce told me I was much better looking in real life than on camera when we celebrity interviewed me on his radio show)
You know that old saying, “The camera adds 15 pounds”? You know how a lot of commenters talk about how big your nose is? Yeah.

when I meet people, their opinions are, “That is the most impressive young man I have ever met”
They’re impressed by the fact that you can take all this criticism and keep plugging along with “Duh Gurney”, but I think that’s about it.

“What a spectacular specimen of a human being”, and “It’s hard to believe he isn’t the president of the United States already”
Lies #64 and 65.

While in KA, I will also try to meet up with and network with some of my celeb friends and peers, make a couple nighttime Celeb appearances at the hottest clubs and restaurants in KA, and am also working on scheduling additional “Biz” meetings and an interview that would be the biggest one Arthur Kade has done thus far, and am just waiting for confirmation that it will go down and if last time I was in KA was any reminder this trip will be filled with “Kade Style” surprises.
Whatever happened to “The Blonde” and “The Loo”? I thought they lived in Los Angeles (or, at least in the area surrounding it)? Perhaps they should be on the lookout for him (and maybe even throw in a few ‘surprises’ of their own!)?

“The Brand remembers telling his elementary teacher he wanted to be an actor when he grew up. He should have told her he was going to be a Hollywood Legend”
…in the jail cell of his own mind.

For all the Kade Nation Members who don’t remember why Los Angeles became Kade Angeles last year
Or, more importantly, don’t care…

I spend the day at the hottest spots in town like The IVY, and The Thompson Pool (Where I had a gorgeous black girl all over me)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkGrWzlc3T4
I liked the part in the video (0:20) where you said, “Look at that shit” in reference to her face. No way that anyone could ever imply racism by that remark. And she was NOT all over you; she was lying back, enjoying the sun when your guido-wannabe ass intruded on her beautiful privacy.

had some of the top comedians in Hollywood inviting me to private parties
Don’t you mean Sarah Silverman’s sister, Laura? Is Laura Silverman a top comedian? Nothing against her, but don’t pump other people up the way you pump yourself up, Arthur.

In the comments section of a previous Legowig post (Showtime, Kadester!), Anonymous, on February 23rd, 2010 at 2:38 PM said, “His website is a mess. The "comments" are not even remotely funny anymore.” I think the comments are not as funny as they used to be, but there are some good ones from time to time. Let’s recap:

Brute Force Anal Thruster on 11 Mar 2010 at 10:30 am
Such a stupid fucking post! Let’s hope the show you’re pitching is “Are You Smarter Than A Philly Retard?”

Bob Vila on 11 Mar 2010 at 11:47 am
This shit is just sad, at this point.
As Five Knuckles In A Juicy Pussy pointed out above, Arthur hoping to be on a reality show, which by nature is not acting. So even Arthur’s aspirations are failures.
Arthur, you are the rocketship that blew up on the launch pad. You are the still born baby. You aimed high and murdered your own chances before they even had a chance to get off the ground. Wow.
Furthermore, how pathetic are the claims made in this and many other posts? Confident people don’t go around shouting how popular, talented and good looking they are to anyone who will listen. They know they are all of those things, know everyone else will see it for themselves and go about their gifted lives. It’s painfully clear you don’t see yourself as any of those things, or you wouldn’t be pleading with your blog readers to believe that you are.
Which IS what you do, everyday. You BEG us to believe in you, Arthur, yet nobody does.

Phil the @ssdrillon 11 Mar 2010 at 12:00 pm
Please document everything. and don’t forget to take a picture in every washroom you visit.

Now, the reader may think that, by posting comments from ArTurd’s site, I’m trying to make my own content funnier. Not true. The reason that I went back to Kade’s site over and over again (when I first found it) was because of the hilarity of the Gen Pop commenters; the ability of the common man to make entertainment for and amongst himself was far more intriguing than Kade’s endless, rampant, exaggerated drivel.

I’m beginning to think that Kade has some life-threatening disease. It makes perfect sense: if you know you’re dying, why would you continue doing a dead-end job like the one he had in finances? Why not spend the remainder of your days living out some childhood dream? He may have thought to himself (soon after being diagnosed) that he wanted to do something that people will remember him for. The sad part (of course) is that when Kadyshes is gone, he’ll only be remembered in a hateful way, as Arthur Kade.

Regarding the Legowig post entitled “Awesome voicemail”, Anonymous, on March 10th, 2010 at 4:04 PM, said:

Unfortunately, I really don't care about Kade anymore and only visit your blog every few weeks

That’s entirely fine with me. I understand that, as less and less people comment on Kade’s tripe, the Wig will have fewer visitors as well. Our goal here is to make sure Arthur’s ship sinks all the way to the bottom, which means we have to follow him into the depths. But, as long as there’s one less douchebagging guido-famewhore clogging up the airwaves, the better our society will be (even if only 0.00000000000000001% better).