"Lego Wig" Arthur Kade: The Journey (to a Mental Institution): ridiculous grammar

Showing posts with label ridiculous grammar. Show all posts

4/22/10

Dancing With The South AfriKade Threesome

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He grins at his fantasy win while we facepalm at his reality failure.

How long can I keep doing this, you may wonder? Throwing out insults, marking his quotes in blue, calling him out on statements that I think are suspect...Well, I’m going to do it as long as it takes. I don’t believe Kade will kill himself, nor do I wish such a thing (not only for legal reasons but because I’m not quite that kind of asshole); therefore, this will go on for quite some time. I think that, by the time Kade decides to throw in the towel (which I suspect will take at least another year), everyone who started following Duh Gurney will be gone…and probably me, too (to be replaced by another Kater, no doubt). Until then, however…

Kennerley vs. Kade

Recently I cut & pasted a comment from Kade’s site asking if there was a Kade drinking game. Well, after looking in “the archives”, I found it…

Weekly catch-up

I’m going to start with a few items that I should have included in the last post I did (which was “Showtime, Kadester!”):

Celebrating A Year In Obscurity - The Bland's Journey Turns One

Well folks, Arthur Kade's quest to become the most famous and talented actor in the world has just turned a year old, and what a year it's been. Arthur has put up a new post reflecting on his year, and it's honestly sad to see what he considers to be his high points, because most of them are lies, or are just plain stupid.

Even more hilarious, though, is that the fact that after a year of attempting to become an actor, he has still not spoken a single word in any production. He spends his days trolling Actor's Access, by himself like thousands of other "actors," many of which I imagine are much more successful than he is. The most he has to his name are a few extra spots on some movies and tv shows - things that his often-despised "Gen Pop" doesn't even pay attention to. It's so funny to think that Arthur really believes that, as an extra, possibly in a scene that he may be visible for a nanosecond, he is adding something huge to the project. Witness this item from his "best of year one" list on the new post:

In working with some of the top acting teachers and talent judges in Philly, NYC, and KA, it is widely regarded that Arthur Kade has raised his abilities in Film/TV Acting and The Craft to award winning levels already, and this has led to him working on hit projects in Film and TV WITH fellow Crafters like Angie Jolie, Jen Aniston, Gerry Butler, Alec Baldwin, and Dev Patel, and has become one of “The Fastest rising actors in Young Hollywood”. This has taken hundreds of hours of pain staking preparation and behind the scenes practice as well as a drive for excellence to become the greatest and most decorated actor in American History. Despite all the fame, future eight figure paychecks, and celebrity benefits that I already get, the end goal of “The Journey is to touch Lil’ Oscar and bring him home to enjoy for years to come.

Notice the word "WITH" bolded above. He was an extra on movies or shows involving these actual actors. He has the nerve to lie and suggest he worked with them individually, when all he did was stand somewhere like dozens or hundreds of extras on the same production. And about those top acting teachers and talent judges? Arthur, if you were so good then why aren't you an actor? Why have you not had a speaking role in a single scene in a single production yet? Finally, doesn't one have to have acted in a Hollywood production to call oneself a member of "young hollywood?" Even better - doesn't one have to ACTUALLY BE YOUNG to be a part of "young hollywood?" Being 32 years old, and looking like a 40 year old doesn't get you into this category.

There's one thing we do give Arthur credit for: he sure is dedicated to getting attention. The entire last year of his life has been so completely about his need for attention, and so much less about his dream of becoming an actor. He is so wrapped up in gaining any semblance of attention that he's willing to make a fool out of himself constantly even to receive negative attention. He fails to see that radio shows interview him because he's a once-in-a-lifetime absurdity (and even that's a stretch - a new idiot is born every day!) and he's stupid enough to think that Philadelphia Magazine is an "internationally read magazine," and not simply a local publication in the 5th largest market in the United States.

We completely expect more of the same for the next year. What else is there to expect? An actual TV show? A book that will never get published? Some casting director clueless enough to give an ugly, lisping, hyperactive and unprofessional asshole a single word in a movie? Face it Kade, when this time rolls around next year - that is, if you're not committed to an insane asylum before then - we can guarantee ourselves that it will be much like this past year: the posts about parties and girls you didn't have sex with will outnumber posts about acting 12 to 1.

It's just so sad that a person goes to bed each night dreaming about winning acting awards, and "practicing it [Oscar acceptance speech] everyday while I’m walking or driving," yet has absolutely no self awareness to realize how totally unreachable that goal really is.
Finally, Arthur, this list is for you. We feel like you need to be reminded of some of the actual truths about why you will not be an Oscar winning actor, or, even an actual actor at all.

You still have a lisp.
You still have acne.
In person, people say you look like you're in your early 40s.
Your hygiene is the only "third world" aspect of your existence.
You're just not dedicated to acting; you're dedicated to attention and partying.
You have very few friends left. Your "entourage" usually just consists of you, all alone.
You don't realize that people read your blog because they hate you, your YouTube videos rarely receive more than one star, and the comments say it all: PEOPLE HATE YOU!
You don't have millions of fans; at best you have a few thousand people who read your site, again, BECAUSE THEY HATE YOU, and your stupidity and idiocy helps many people feel really good about their successful lives.
You live alone, with barely any furniture, and you live like a pig.
You hate everyone but yourself.
Your therapy is obviously not working.
You lie about every aspect of your life, because you know your life is worthless, and lying is the only way you can be somebody.
You're not a good Jew; you only use your religion for for attention.
You really, really freaked the fuck out when the legowigkade blog started up - we still laugh at that: a supposed A List movie star reduced to moderating his own blog, and copying comments from legowigkade because people were leaving you in droves. You were so afraid, and so immature! We still laugh at that often.
You accost total strangers for photos, many of whom are never high enough in the Kade scale, this contradicting your bullshit claims that you only associate with attractive people.
Pay attention here: YOU HAVE NO ACTING TALENT WHATSOEVER. THE END.

2/13/10

Katchin-guh up with Kade.

With the exception of 3 videos, all of the “Kade Nation Obsession Videos” are simply videos that have been uploaded to or are favorited by the LegoWigKade Youtube channel. It doesn’t upset me that he has done this. Why? Because he WANTS to upset me.

read more “Katchin-guh up with Kade.”

The Bland and his FAIL Nation...

From the “30 rock” blob…

“As A rising celeb, and future Oscar/Emmy Winner…” – Bullshit.

“…you get the ability to choose which amazing projects you get to work on…” – Horseshit.

“…and which ones don’t make that much sense for your resume or image…” – Goatshit.

Kade’s personal copy of CLEO magazine should be shredded…then sprinkled all over his bleeding face…after an Aussie gives him a good ol’ down-under beating

Some of you may be thinking, “Oh no. ANOTHER blog by Kade and ANOTHER hack job by LWK on that blog.” Well, you won’t be disappointed. It doesn’t depress me that Kade is furthering his whacko mind with his website; as a matter of fact, it entertains me and makes me laugh that a 32 (when’s his birthday?)-year-old man with dreams of becoming an actor would post a video of himself talking about “cleaning the spit off” his “thing” after showing a glimpse of his “celebrity life” (a.k.a. unwashed clothes on the god damn floor)

Kade is a dope whose website would get more hits if his waste-of-cumB body was hanging at the end of a rope

I think it would be pointless (and a waste of space) to reproduce his "Rope-A-Dope" blog entry here in its entirety, but I will pick out sentences here and there.

U D S - Some Nonsense About Kade Evolving From An Ugly Childhood

We've not even read this yet, but saw the words "I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before" and completely spit out hot chocolate.

While having an amazingly fun din with my old roommate of 2 years, and one of his friends at The Piazza in No-Libs last night (This is hipster central, and after Arthur Kade’s “Kade Style” domination of their unofficial headquarters, “The Brandbary” (The Barbary) last month, I truly feel like their is a cross-culture respect between Kade Nation and the Hipsters to where they eye me now, and truly understand all that I am accomplishing with “The Biz” and “The Journey”), we were recanting all of the memories that we enjoyed while living together in my old house. We have always shared a symbiotic relationship, because we both have admittedly grew up as “The Ugly Duckling”, and then turned into drop dead gorgeous NYC models who could have any girls we desired, but at the same time we had to deal with the pain and torture of being the best looking, most charming, and most desired man in any room, and this will always bring out The Haters in full effect, and when I cam home, I was sent a picture of what The Brand looked like at 6 years old (Not to seem arrogant, but Arthur Kade was maybe the most handsome and lovable kid I have ever seen, and it is a shame that Papa and Mama Kade didn’t unite to make me a movie or TV Star then because I could have been the original Haley Joel Osment or Dakota Fanning) , and it really got me thinking about how a theory I call U.D.S., or the “Ugly Duckling Syndrome”, and how it affects stars and celebrities like Arthur Kade.

If you look at some of the most famous stars in the world like myself, many of them were very average looking or shy in high school, and then blossomed as time went on, and I can honestly admit that I was very average looking in high school because I was so poor that I wore the same clothes every day, never got haircuts, wore my grandmother’s socks, and bought clothes at discount shops (I was a future superstar living in the Gen Pop world and the Gen Pop let me know it by always making fun of me, snickering when I walked by, and talking about how I would be in the Food Stamp line with all the kids that were bused in), and then I was romantically linked in high school to the prettiest girl in my high school (She was so hot at that time that cars would stop in the middle of the street to check her out, and the Gen Poppers in my school would say, “I can’t believe Arthur landed her, he is the fucking man”, but the truth is that we were just friends), and that’s when it all changed and Arthur Kade went from loser to “King of Kadealot”. The amazing fact of the matter is that all the kids that were considered “Cool” in high school are either married and miserable, in jail, or complete Gen Pop losers.

I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before, and living with an unabated anger to be the best, and the rest is history, and now here is The Brand on the verge of becoming the “Biggest Star in Hollywood”, but the lesson that is to be taken away is that U.D.S. is truly a good thing if utilized correctly. For Arthur Kade, it was that constant pain that prepared me to never care what other people say (Hence, why I almost never read comments on my site, or care what “The Katers” think), and that drive to prove everyone wrong and do the impossible is what made me a “Living Legend” in my old company, and put me on the verge of super-stardom in “The Biz” today. The more the Gen Pop tells Arthur Kade he can’t the more he knows he can. Everybody loves the underdog, and Arthur Kade and “The Journey” are the true definition of people around the world cheering and following someone who would rather die than not achieve the impossible, and it is that passion and desire which has led many to compare me to the Muhammad Ali of my generation.

U.D.S. is also great when it comes to girls, because many girls who are not hot in high school or college would find ways to become more proficient at luring hot guys by developing better oral sex techniques, learning to be better in bed, and release their jealousy of the hot girls by giving gorgeous men like myself a treat to prove their worth. Once those ugly to average girls become hot, they have this insecurity so ingrained in them that now you get the total package of hot girl and great sex, so I have always joked with friends, “Ask her what she looked like in high school so you can see if she was the spoiled prom queen and will be a “”Dead Fish”", or if she grew into herself and will be the “”Hungry Lion”"”. That is the knowledge that makes Arthur Kade a god of opposite sex brilliance.

The next month or two has so many surprises in store for Kade Nation that I can hardly stop from getting an erection in Kade’s Corner, and my arrival to Sundance will be the stuff where legends are made.

“Growing up In poverty wasn’t a disadvantage, it was Arthur Kade’s winning lottery ticket to brilliance and orgasm”…Arthur Kade…01/06/09

Here is the level of transformation that occurred in The Brand from childhood to high school to Rising Celebrity in KA:

1/5/10

The Beast Is Back - Arthur's Body Continues To Look Like Garbage

What in the hell does any of this mean?? "Transforms from a Category 2 Tropical Depression?" Also Kade, we're all for you taking up Matt Beauchamp on his offer to prove that you can bench 255. We all know you are lying, so put up or shut up. Beauchamp asked for a video of you lifting 255 lbs once, but we want a video of you doing a 10 reps at 255 lbs. Not one rep, but a full set of 10. Let's see it. Lifting weight once doesn't mean shit if you can't rep it. You're an ugly, untalented, unemployed liar. We won't pay you anything for doing either, we just want to offer you an opportunity to prove something for once.

As Arthur Kade transforms from a Category 2 Tropical Depression Over The Atlantic to the Category 6 Hurricane Kade that will be invading, dominating, captivating, and embracing the Sundance Film Festival, “The Journey” is living in the gym (When I saw what my face and neck looked like on NYE, and how FAT I looked, it was a wake up call that a future TV/Movie/Literary star as Arthur Kade can not mail it in like Gerry Butler who has put on 50Lbs. since 300), boxing, playing basketball and soccer, and doing what needs to be done to get back in the shape I can be in these pics below (I also have a contest going with a girlfriend of mine around this, so there is ZERO chance I lose to a girl!!). One of The Entourage who saw me benching 255 Lbs. last night at the gym said, “Holy Shit, The Old AK is back”, and I have been doing 2 a days since NYE and am like an absolute beast right now. It’s on like Kade Kong because when The Brand is in shape, he has one of the best bodies in the world!!!!! I will be detailing The Brand’s workout shortly and Arthur Kade will be the talk of Hollywood at Sundance, plus there is a chance my Cali BFF and Kade Nation Super Fan, Kent Osborne will also be there so we can have a “Kade Style” reunion, so I want to look like he remembers me from my KA domination in June.
“I wonder if Jerry Rice would want to work out with a celeb like Arthur Kade for some publicity?”…Arthur Kade…01/06/09

Before you watch the new videos, let's refresh your memory on this very honest critique of Kade's body from an actual trainer, from back on August 6, 2009. If anything, Kade's body has gotten worse, and, knowing the complete lack of dedication he has to anything, it should be expected that he will not improve much about his body. He looked terrible back then, he looks worse now, and he just doesn't have the ability to change in the time that he thinks he can change.

New Videos:

These next two photos are so completely hideous, there are just no words for it.

Look people! Kade finally realizes that he smells like shit and sweats like a pig, that his breath smells like an old cum rag, and he's trying to do something about it!

Arthur's Big Announcement - He's Going to Sundance as a Wannabe Actor

Arthur teased for an entire day about some big announcement yesterday, and in the end it was simply that he's going to the Sundance Film Festival at the end of this month - something anyone can buy tickets to attend. He wasn't invited. Instead, since he thinks he's a celebrity and part of Hollywood, he thinks he's going to go there and "compare notes about “The Journey” with fellow stars from “Old and Young Hollywood” like Robert Redford, Zac Effron, Paris Hilton, and Joel Schumacher." Yeah, seriously, he wrote that. A guy who has never acted in anything, never spoken a single line in any movie, calls these people "fellow stars." Not only that, he also thinks that various industry people are going to be interested in an as yet undeveloped, unfilmed, unseen TV show that he lies about constantly and has the nerve to call a hit, not to mention an unwritten, unpublished, unread book that he constantly calls a New York Times Bestseller.
Grab a garbage bag, because you're about to throw up.

Many Gen Poppers have been asking The Brand as to why he skipped leaving town for an amazing and extravagant trip on NYE like he normally would (Last Year was amazing trip to Kadeami where on NYE I partied with Macy Gray and Jared Leto at The Setai and Mokai), and I have been promising that “The Year Of The Brand” would have many surprises to tickle the underbelly’s of Kade Nation around the globe (This is just the first with me unwrapping another special gift for The Gen Pop in a few weeks), and the first answer to both of those questions is now unveiled. Anyone in “The Biz” knows that the long-running Sundance Film Festival is regarded by movie makers as the most famous and premiere Indie film festival in Kademerica, and now one of “The Biz’s” fastest rising stars as an actor, author, and talent, Arthur Kade, will be in attendance. The Brand will be attending the first week of the festival (All people in “The Biz” know that The first week is the one that features all of the “A-List Talent, so I wanted my fellow “Crafters” to get the chance to meet me) with many of his “A-List” peers on The Craft and Directorial side, and it will mark the beginning of a new era for the festival with the attendance of such a rising and polarizing star, and I actually joked with one of The Entourage tonight at dinner, “If people thought Vinnie Chase had a great time in the land of “”Hollywood on Ski’s”", wait until they see the recipe Arthur Kade will be cooking up there”.

The Sundance Film Festival will be taking place in Park City, Utah starting January 21st, and it will be amazing to sit down and compare notes about “The Journey” with fellow stars from “Old and Young Hollywood” like Robert Redford (The Founder Of the festival who I would love to talk to about my unique career path, and how many “Bizzers” believe Arthur Kade will revolutionize the modern acting world and maybe even give some advice to other up and coming actors), Zac Effron, Paris Hilton, Joel Schumacher and others that will be attendance, and I am curious to see all of the potential mega-attention that I get from agents, publicists and fellow Talent asking me about the revolutionary hit TV Show that I have been building with IMG Media for months, and how the authoring of my NY Times Bestseller is going with Trident Media Group, as well as comparing notes with fellow “Bizzers” on the various projects we are all working on at the moment for 2010, plus it will give The Brand a chance to meet and network with well known producers and directors who probably know who Arthur Kade is already after only 10.0012 months into “The Journey”, and perhaps even get a deal done to deliver lines or star in one of their up-coming movies (I was telling another friend today when I finalized the trip, “How cool would it be to have someone just say, “”I think Arthur Kade would be a great fit in my next movie. I wonder if he’s interested?”"”).

The other part of Sundance outside of the ability to see the movies and stars of tomorrow like myself, is that it is one of the great Hollywood party events of the year because every night there are exclusively sponsored parties and satellite clubs featuring fellow celebs and performers (I wouldn’t be surprised to see Usher or Alicia Keys hit the stage to sing), and the hottest tail from KA and NYC comes in for the skiing, snowboarding (I don’t really snowboard anymore because years ago while in doing it in Jackson Hole I hurt my ankle and ended up having a stress fracture that required 6 weeks to heel), and ability to meet future TV/Movie/Author stars like an Arthur Kade. It will be great to meet girls at parties in the village, or on the slopes, and bring them back for private Jacuzzi parties or a brilliant night of “Kadeing”.

Either way, this will be a bit of a coming out party for The Brand where many KA “Bizzers” who have been dying to meet him will now get their chance, and relationships will hopefully be built that will help me continue to redefine The Craft, “The Biz”, and take “The Journey” to new heights, as well as potentially meet a KA 9 or 10 to have some fun nights with that can be my “Cali-Girl”. I am also looking forward to building relationships with The Press and Papparazzi (I have been featured already on sites like The Insider and USA Today, but I would like to extend my reach further to People and US Weekly) there that will be covering The Brand for years to come, and many of them will be hearing about “The Journey” for the first time.

“The Craft evolves with it’s artists, and Arthur Kade is it’s New Darwin”…Arthur Kade…01/04/09

1/4/10

The Toy, or, Arthur Kade Thinks He Is God's Gift To Women

Not much to say for an intro to Arthur's latest post. He thinks that doctors and lawyers and accountants drive Hyundais, eat quesadillas, and drink beer. Quick question: what the hell is wrong with quesadillas and beer??? On the flipside, who actually sits around and drinks champagne and eats caviar? Arthur Kade is so up-his-ass delusional with so many stereotypical situations that it never fails to amaze us. He's back at Cosi because he's too cheap to get Internet service in his apartment. This post is just beyond dumb... Kade can think he's a sex symbol all he wants, but a year of going home along to stroke it and blow his load on his nonexistent abs says otherwise!

It’s Monday Morning, its an amazingly early morning at Kade’s Corner at Cosi, and the official “The Year Of The Brand” has begun with Philadelphia’s most famous actor getting back to the grind, but as I work closer and closer to “Biggest Star In the World” status, and collector of the rare animal Arthur Kade calls “Lil’ Oscar”, I can’t help but recall the experiences that The Brand has had with girls the last couple months, and how they have shaped his psyche in understanding his own role to the opposite sex. Considering I have always been a successful business man, the hottest of hot girls have always wanted to get “Wifed” by me, but now that I am as one “Bizzer” called me, a “Cult Celebrity” (Him and I argued that I was mainstream because I am in the seven figs of Gen Poppers who follow “The Journey”) and rising International Sex Symbol, I have noticed a HUGE change in how girls look at me, and Arthur Kade is no longer “Hubbie Material”, but instead I have become “The Toy”. To understand the different classes girls look at guys at here are some popular definitions of different pinholes that we get put into:

1) The Toy-This is the guy who is usually gorgeous and “Mr. Popularity” like myself, that hot girls look at and say, “He’s so much fun to hang out with, but he’s a player, so just have fun with him, and enjoy the sex”, and girls will love spending time with me because I have ultra VIP access to clubs/restaurants/Life, live a jet-setting/elite celeb lifestyle, am recognized on the streets everywhere that I go, and make them feel better about themselves because they feel like Angie next to Brad, but in the end, they get tired of their toy and realize it is probably not going anywhere, and want one who will take them seriously. The greatest thing about being “The Toy” is that you can have sex with hot girls and there is no problem cutting the cord because they know Arthur Kade has to move on to greener pastures, but what if you find one that is special (Or has the potential with top notch training and schooling) and you don’t want to lose it (Or want to keep it on the “Kade Burner” for a while until you decide, is it impossible for them to ever see you as anything besides their sex object? “The Toy” is the guy her friends say to her, “I love him, but not for you” because “The Toy” is the closed off guy who won’t commit in their eyes, and will end up hurting their friend.

2) The Professional-This is the area that most of Center City Philadelphia falls into because this is a “Blue-Collar” town filled with lawyers, accountants, and doctors, and it’s like watching Ants marching when you’re above it all like Arthur Kade. These are the guys who drink beer instead of champagne, eat quesadillas instead of caviar, and drive Hyundai’s instead of Bentley’s, but they are dependable and secure, and girls “Can Build a Life” with them. They are the guy you can bring home to Mom, and he will share his GPA with you, his career track, and what firm or hospital he will be partner at, but if Mom asked, “How many times has my daughter achieved orgasm with you?”, he probably doesn’t even know the answer. “The Professional” is the “White Picket Fence Life” that the girl gets tired of, and then wakes up 10 years later and wonders why he isn’t partner yet, why they never have sex and when they do they have to fit it in between TV shows, and if he is screwing his secretary, and then calls Arthur Kade to remedy the problem.

3) The Homely Brain-This is the guy that the girl tells her girlfriends, “He’s not really my type (Meaning he’s extremely ugly or dorky), but he’s so smart and witty, and makes me laugh (Meaning he has a tiny penis, and couldn’t find his way to a vagina if you drew him a map)”, and usually is some type of scholar or teacher, or has a job he believes “Benefits society”, and will argue with everyone about politics, philosophy, and principle, but has never had enough “Street Cred” like a poor Russian Jew from the “Russian Projects” to know anything about life that he hasn’t read in a textbook. All the girls friends will hate him because he thinks he smarter and elite, and will usually dress like a Brooks Brothers commercial to look “Ordinary”, but in the end the girl still calls “The Toy” for help.

4) The Bad Boy-Although The Brand has been called “The Newest Bad Boy In Hollywood”, and “A New Version of James Dean for the Internet Age” by a media source, he is not the traditional “Bad Boy”. The “Bad Boy” is someone who can’t stay out of trouble, gets drunk and does stupid stuff or gets arrested all the time, doesn’t really care about sleeping with girls, cannot hold down a job, and has bad personal hygiene, but girls love him because he represents a way “To piss Daddy Off”. The Older the “Bad Boy” gets, the lamer he becomes, and while he dominated in high school, he is a loser in his 30’s, and will be the guy everyone sits around at a bar and asks, “Whatever happened to so and so?”

5) The Heir-This is you’re prototypical rich boy who Daddy put through college, never pursued a dream, and is happy to just never have to worry where his next paycheck is coming from, but is so spoiled that everyone else picks on him and makes sure his life is miserable, and he ends up buying a hot girl rather than landing her (Once again she calls “The Toy” for mid day appearances, and I will never forget when I used to hook up with a wife of “The Heir”, and while we were laying in bed at the Motel 6 in King Of Prussia she said to The Brand, “I can’t believe I meet you in a motel to have sex”, and Kade’s response was, “Would you rather be at a Four Seasons and not cumb?”, and she said, “I would rather drive my CL convertible”), but at the end of the day, money won’t bring you happiness, but good alimony will make “The Toy” have to work less

HUGE Announcement coming shortly for “The Journey”!!!!!!

“Kade’s Corner at 8AM is a “”Way Of Life”"”…Arthur Kade…01/04/09

Some recent Kade Nation Fan mail:

1)Guy, I gutta tell you, I’m liking your approach. Reading through your page makes laugh out loud. You come off so confident…(well as others put it,

“like a douche”), but you’re getting the publicity you say you would by doing this. Freaking classic! I like it, but from reading your page I am required to hate you. In reality, we would prob get along well. I get your plan and I hope it works out for you. PROPS! My friend! Props.

All the best,

-Sean

2)I heard you on the bert show. I understand what you are doing and it is probably working because I had to check out your site, but just chill a little because you do not want to be hated. Tone the arrogance down. You are getting the attention but you do not want to be too much over the top. Good Luck!

3)Arthur,

Huge shout out from a huge fan in Kade nation. I was wondering if you could tell us more about your workout/ gym routine and diet. I’m looking to dominate this year with a Kade style body and could learn from you.

Thanks-

Shawn

12/13/09

Appearance Requests

I have to believe that Cock Gobbler is sitting in front of a fireplace somewhere waiting for Santa because with his level of delusion NOTHING is too far out there for him to believe. It's really amazing that not one friend or family member hasn't had him involuntarily committed to a mental institution. The things he thinks he will be able to command in 2010 is so far out there that I don't even know where to begin. I've worked with big name stars with YEARS of proven box office draw that don't have contract riders close to what this dip shit thinks he'll be able to get WITHOUT EVER HAVING BEEN IN ANYTHING where he's more than an EXTRA. I'm no head shrinker, but I have to believe he has broken from reality so badly that there is no return to normalcy. We all knew that because he'll never get hired once HR does a Google search, but now I am convinced the only way he'll be able to end this is in a huge fucking explosion. I hope he only hurts himself when he finally does lose it, but I'm not confident it won't end in murder(s)/suicide. People of Philly, watch your backs. Now, some of the most deluded ramblings Arthur Kadyshes has ever posted...

Being a celebrity and rising name in “The Biz” after only 9.2334 months into “The Journey” (I start my fight Training for My “Warrior Role” in a the feature film I am filming in January, and have a HUGE audition for a principal role in a feature film both on Sunday), Arthur Kade is now a brand name that is being asked to appear at various events, spectacles, and parties, and with “The Year Of The Brand” quickly approaching (I was telling one of the girls at the TITS “Wifey” search (The event was great with an ultra “Kade Style” high energy DJ playing music the whole day, the staff was bringing girls over to meet me and try out to become the next “Wifey”, and it honestly felt like an awesome night club during the day, and I can’t wait to see how the pics come out of the girls we end up selecting for TITS) that I guest appeared and started judging today, and which I will be hanging out with Porn Star Courtney Cumzz at tomorrow (I will make sure to take a bunch of pics and vids because she is one of the biggest Porn Stars in the world, and it will be an edgy change from the Hollywood “A-Listers” I usually chill with), that “In 2010, Arthur Kade will be the biggest name in Hollywood, and possibly the biggest name in the world”, and all she could do was smile and be going nuts inside that on a day when she thought she was just entering a normal store, she met an enormous budding KA star), as I was driving home to the 215 from NYC, I was thinking about how celebs like Rihanna, J-LO (Who I just partied at the invitation only VOGUE/Versace party in Kadeami with), and Angie Jolie request certain things when they appear at events, and what will be my requests next year when I am being paid to appear at parties, clubs, movie premieres, charity/social events, and children’s birthdays, and here is what I came up with:

1) 1400 Thread Count Sheets/Silk Pajamas-Having grown up on welfare fighting for blankets to stay warm at night, Arthur Kade has always put a heavy premium on what type of sheets caress his skin at night, and while I don’t always care if I stay in a suite, I do care that I have the finest sheets in the hotel that I am being placed in because I want to be able to relax before delighting the crowd with my presence, and also I love to keep the room extra cold and hide under the sheets because it gives me a sense of feeling like a child all over again. This is also crucial because when The Brand takes a girl or Fan back to the hotel, it is vital that she enjoys her Kadeing by relaxing after in warmth, and this will also make her feel even more euphoria about being with a celeb of Kade’s caliber.

2) White Roses-These are my favorite smelling roses, and I love walking into a room that smells good and fresh because it shows me that the entity paying me to appear cares about The Brand, and is willing to go the extra mile to make me feel at home and comfortable. They can either be in a vase, bowl, or just on the ground (This would be extra erotic when I bring a fellow celeb back or Fan(s) that want a threesome where you just walk around barefoot during and after sex, and just walk on white roses like in a dream), but I want the smell to be overwhelming, and the beauty of the scene would be total “Kade Style” dream like. This will also be a sign that Arthur Kade has risen from poverty to star, and will help me stay grounded as I know that millions are watching me ascend the ladder to Little Oscar on my mantle.

3) Fine Imported Water-Arthur Kade drinks anywhere from 20-25 glasses of water a day, and once I am at the top of “The Biz”, Perrier/Pellegrino is just not good enough for purity, so I will request that my water be flown in privately (This is something Jen Aniston is famous for, so I may have a Rep from Team Kade contact her people in KA, and see what she prefers and maybe even split the cost with her if she wants) from Europe so that I can stay hydrated to combat my Type 2 Diabetes.

4) Private Butler and Chef- When “The Journey” reaches full global epidemic stages next year with my hit TV Show with IMG Media, and my NY Times Bestseller with Trident Media Group, I will prefer that only a select few are allowed to prepare my food or touch my belongings, so Team Kade will do background checks and credit checks to decide who will be allowed to privately cook for me, and clean my rooms and houses. The Brand is one of the most controversial figures in the world already (A Fan compared me to John Lennon this week because of the polarizing nature of “The Modern Actor” that I have created and am ushering in), so like a country’s president, or political figure, I have to know that what I put in my body, and who is around me is safe.

5) BodyGuards-Like the above item, I need to have a team of people watching me and protecting me from rabid fans, stalkers (Already have some now who twitter, call, and email, and it’s only going to get worse in 2010), and especially paparazzi who try to see the latest KA 9 or 10 I close, or what store or restaurant I am in, and although I am a “Celeb Of The People” (I love to give autographs, vids, and pics to Gen Poppers and Kade Nation), safety comes first for The Brand, and if someone’s husband thinks I slept with his overzealous wife, I need people who can protect a multi-million dollar investment like Arthur Kade. My bodyguards will be required to have hand to hand combat training, rifle, gun, and explosive expertise, and have a former background as a professional like Secret Service, FBI, or CIA

“The Brand is Guts, Hustle, and Gangsta’ all wrapped inside of Beauty”…Arthur Kade…12/11/09

and for the first time, I write in quote from a Kade Nation Member:

Hey Arthur. I thought of a great quote you could use for your next post.. Keep killing it, Kade style!!

” Christians worship Jesus, Gen Poppers worship Arthur Kade—-But since gen poppers outnumber Christians 3 to 1, looks like we have a clear winner for the title of “New Messiah”

12/4/09

Arrival in Miami Not Kadeami

So Arthur arrive in Miami yesterday... he can't believe the pilot didn't recognize him... he thought the pilot said "have a nice day" because it was him, not because pilots say that to everyone as they leave the plane... he took a video at baggage claim, wearing a self-painted t-shirt that says "Kade Style" on the front and "Kade Out" on the back... he checked into the W hotel as if he were checking into a million dollar a night palace, as if what he's doing is inaccessible to the "gen pop" he so despises... he posted an absurd amount of childish and immature twitter posts about where he was... he thinks he's a "jet setter" when he's only flying for the second time all year... and he thinks he's an international jet setter when he has not even been out of the country this year at all... he thinks he thinks that flying and checking into a hotel and having lunch is "more than most gen-poppers do in a week."

Miami, we feel so sorry for you. We're sorry that this talentless creep from Philadelphia is visiting your town and thinks he owns the place. We're sorry you have to be infected with the disgusting head-to-toe nightmare that is Arthur Kade. We're sorry that this guy is walking about taking photos and videos constantly, and posting to Twitter from his phone. We're sorry that a person who has accomplished nothing thinks he is going to "dominate" your city as if he is a multi-million dollar earning celebrity. We sympathize with you, truly.

All lies and unprovable nonsense are highlighted below:

It’s official that The Brand has arrived in Kadeami, and the amazing Gen Pop domination that Arthur Kade is famous for is about to begin at levels this city hasn’t seen in years. I have gotten emails from Kade Nation Fnas from around the globe begging me to update as much as possible to see if I meet a “Drought” Breaker, How the audition and Potential Gig go on Saturday and Sunday, and most importantly to view how a celebrity and International “Jet Setter” in his prime, parties in one of the hottest cities in the world. There are many private parties that we have already been invited to, and plenty of vagina to spread around, and knowing that I have a killer audition for “The Journey” this weekend is just a cherry on top because all I have been hearing about is how December is a “Dead Month” for auditions and work, and how every casting director and “Bizzer” is checked out until January, but the fact that I have booked multiple auditions and a potential “Warrior Role” on a film are a testament to my fortitude to The Craft, especially while authoring a hit book and developing a hit TV Show. I have already met some fellow models that will potentially be joining Philadelphia’s favorite son tonight (The best moment of the day so far was a random Kade Nation Fan stopping me outside the W on Collins, and saying, “You’re that Guy from Philadelphia!!”, and I smiled and said “I’ll write about you on ArthurKade.com tonight, what’s your name or let’s do a video?”, and he replied, “I can’t do a video, but thanks man”, and rolled off into the street).

Here are the details from my arrival so far, Pictures and vids from the hottest hotel in Miami, The Newly Opened W Hotel (This place is so “Kade Style”), and the 5 star Setai Hotel where we just grabbed a quick dinner before hitting the invitation only parties that only Arthur Kade gains access to (The crazy thing is I have only been here 3 hours and The Brand already has done more than most Gen Poppers do here in a week) and I’m interested to see what celeb friends I run into and exchange “Biz” talk with about my progress and updates on “The Journey”. I may take it a bit easier tonight just because Friday and Saturday are going to be insane with dinners, events, and clubs, but anytime I say that, I wake up with an NYC 9 or 10 next to me, wondering how she got there and how I will get her to leave.

“”Jet Setting” isn’t about where you travel, but what stewardesses you get to play with in your personal private Jet”…Arthur Kade…12/03/09

Finally, we grabbed this image from the YouTube video above. Yes folks, it appears that he used stencils and spray paint to make a shirt that says "Kade Style." There really are no words that define how totally stupid this is.

11/30/09

EU Syndrome

He gets worse with each post. He is a piece of shit, low class Philly asshole. If I had a child that grew up to be 1/10th of what Arthur Kadyshes is I would become a politician so I could change the abortion laws to make it legal to abort up until and including the 103rd trimester. More lies and delusion from the Cock Gobbler himself, Arthur Kadyshes...

Gen Poppers come up to me and tell me all the time how amazing and glorious it is to see “The Journey” succeeding, and how amazing it must be to live this “Celebrity Life” of Arthur Kade (Just seeing Molly Weiner’s ((Whose whole fam is all rooted in “The Biz”)) reaction to seeing the “Kade Show Live” made me realize I am a once in a lifetime attraction), and for the most part, it really is awesome to know that I am on my way to becoming an award winning actor and author while developing a hit TV Show with IMG Media, and a New York Times Bestseller with Trident Media Group, but there are sometimes The Brand looks in his mirror at Chateau Kade, and thinks about how much he has changed emotionally throughout “The Journey”, as I complete my transformation from ultra-successful socialite/entrepreneur to “Global Marketing Icon”. Arthur Kade now looks in the mirror, and sees a person who is so passionate about his professional and social life in becoming a M.I.M. (Mogul In The Making) and yet so “EU” (Emotionally Unavailable) in his private life towards girls he sleeps with, his family and friends, and even his fans (I am becoming a global sex symbol where I have girls pretty much throwing themselves at me at all times, and yet 99% of the time, I see nothing there but a Vagina and a quick conquest while they all want me to “Wife” them), and wonder if this inability to commit to anything other than my thrust to Oscar winning Actor hurts me as as a Gen Pop Role Model and also as an actor.

Friday night was interesting, because I had a friend out again from KA (I am not sure that he has ever seen the type of Gen Pop Domination that I demonstrated Weds. and Friday nights where he actually told me at Recess, “Your stamina is remarkable) who saw me A) Make out with two girls simultaneously at Recess for at least 10 seconds not once but twice (This was so sexual that I think I had a massive erection the whole time thinking what a threesome with them would be like and having 2 different tongues thrust into my mouth like little hammerhead sharks), B) Stop a girl who works at a restaurant who I was sure hated me with her friend, and after several minutes of Kadeish charm, her and her friend were doing shots with me and playing the “Ice Cube Game” (This game is where you put an ice cube in your mouth and transfer it from mouth to mouth in a kissing motion and I actually had 4 girls playing with me in the middle of The Mogul Room at G and people’s faces around us said, “Only Arthur Kade could have 4 girls locking lips with him to get ice” and it’s funny because anytime I play that game an extra tongue touch happens so I wonder if that counts as “Hooking Up”), C) Dancing on all the raised speakers at Recess with girls and the Drummer to where one of the guys at DelFriscos said, “When we walked in, You were a dancing machine”, D)Having one of the prominent club owners of Philly say, “You are really the King Of Philly Now”, E)Having a Philly 5.86 who my friend called “Mr. T” tell me style was impeccable but that was so annoying that I literally turned my back when she tried to convince me Playboy was “Up Her Ass” and F) A girl who came up to me and said, “You have some HUGE Website, can I take a pic?”, and after we took it, she said “What’s the site by the way?” and I asked the bouncer to get her out of my sight immediately (If you don’t know who Arthur Kade is, then do not approach him). I am a social and acting god in “The Biz”, and had my friend in KA call my blog “Brilliant”, and “Fresh” and tell a friend in “The Entourage” at G, “His content is so obsessive and funny” (It’s weird to hear my writing and life referred to as “Content”, but that’s how we “Bizzers” refer to a living organic element like my blog), but like any genius, sometimes I question certain aspects of my life, and whether my pioneering Brilliance is a gift or a curse?

The question for Arthur Kade is have I become like Jason Bourne in “The Bourne Ultimatum” where I have become such a tremendous acting and writing “killing machine”, that I am sometimes losing the essence of who Arthur Kade really is? The Brand has always rated girls, used and had the hottest ones, and been the best at what he did professionally (I was called a “Living Legend” at my Old Company by a former Senior Vice President), but has “The Biz” and this sex symbol status jaded me to a point where normality no longer exists, and I have to be a “Frank Sinatra” like influence all the time on the Gen Pop, and will it ever allow me to be more than just a media giant/corporation? Am I losing the “human side” of Arthur Kade, and truly becoming a well-oiled killing machine who only hooks up with 9’s and 10’s and desires Little Oscar in his bed, and has to deal with Press/Media and Paparazzi, but nothing else? Will I get to a point where even Caviar is not good enough anymore, and the threesomes aren’t enough, and the money isn’t enough, and will this insatiable hunger for vagina, awards, and recognition actually not allow me to be happy and just become a media and sexual robot who dies aloof like Marlon Brando?

I have always wondered why so many celebs are so unhappy ,and considering I am one of them now after only 8.8991 months, I can tell Kade Nation that it really is everything it’s cracked up to be, but in the end, it’s not about the money and Fame, but still about the Emmy, Oscar, and Pulitzer, and I think that’s what has kept Arthur Kade so grounded. I can live a “Third World Lifestyle” (No Furniture, Blogging in a Beach Chair, Going to Kade’s Corner at Cosi everyday I’m not making a TV Show, Writing a Book, or being featured in a Movie) while dominating KA and NYC, but considering I just booked a feature film audition (I will blog this next) because I will be training on warrior fighting techniques to prepare for it, I am more excited about that than anything else.

“The Craft is what brought Arthur Kade to fame and sex symbol status, and it is what will keep his Legend alive. Welcome to Kadealot”…Arthur Kade…11/29/09

I also want to give a “Kade Style” Shout out to Fellow Celeb Fan, Zach Galifianakis, (The Hangover, HBO’s Bored To Death), who I heard mentioned he was a fan of The Brand and “The Journey” on the Comedy Death Ray podcast on I-Tunes.