8/24/09

Why Does This Blog Exist?

This blog is a refuge from the actual arthurkade.com site. It is our place to openly and freely discuss one of the most despicable men the Internet has seen in the last hundred years. For some, Arthur Kade is a joke; they think it's all an elaborate hoax in an attempt to earn a reality show, or achieve fame through being an idiot on purpose.

For others, Arthur Kade is 100% real, and all 100% of him is garbage. With great desperation, he is pursuing fame and celebrity at any cost. He is paving his path to infamy with a disgusting, sexist, self-centered, misogynistic, and utterly vile collection of blog posts in which he lies repeatedly about sexual conquests, judges and talks negatively about countless numbers of women - both famous actresses and average "fans" - and paints a ridiculous portrait of his talent as an actor. 

To this point, his only real success (not as an actor, but as a barely recognized extra) has been an appearance on Gossip Girl for all of a nanosecond. Maybe that's all he needed, but earlier this year after being let go from Ameriprise as a financial consultant, he set out on a "journey" to become an award winning actor, all without having ever really acted in anything. He claims to have been a professional model, but this has never been backed up by Arthur despite repeated requests for names of magazines he may have appeared in, or fashion products he may have modeled exclusively for. 

Since beginning his "journey," he has primarily spent his time shuffling between trendy bars in Philadelphia, New York City, and Atlantic City, and has posted a vast number of completely absurd videos to YouTube ranging from horrible attempts at acting, to random and mundane snapshots of his life. To truly understand the demented outlook on both himself and his future would require hours upon hours of consumption of past blog posts, videos, and comments. Ah, yes, the comments... You see, despite Arthur Kade's claims of fame, celebrity, and worldwide recognition, more than 80% of the comments left on his blog since it's inception have been negative. Most people hate him. Most people wish for his demise. Most people are shocked that such a delusional, self centered fame whore walks among the earth.

Arthur Kade lacks even a novice's level of acting talent. Yet, to hear it from him, he's a better actor already than Al Pacino, all while never having spoken a single line in any production! He has no Plan B; winning an Oscar is his only plan. Despite a massive and continuous amount of negative comments about his complete lack of acting skill, he plods on without even the slightest hint of improvement. Acting classes, improv classes, and all the practice in the world have done nothing to improve his "craft" as he calls it.
Arthur Kade has a wide range of physical flaws that are either noticeable in photographs and videos, or have been confirmed by those who have met him in person, including, but certainly not limited to:
  1. Giant "Count Chocula" eyebrows
  2. Rapey looking eyes
  3. A giant, hideous nose with frighteningly giant nostrils
  4. Dry lips, often cracked and bloody
  5. Spittle that forms in the corner of his mouth when he talks
  6. Adult acne
  7. Horrible breath
  8. A lisp that is consistently obvious despite speech therapy classes
  9. Ridiculous hair, currently showing evidence of balding
  10. A nail biting habit, resulting in raw, bloody fingernailsA strange habit of hopping and bouncing and talking out loud to himself
  11. Untold other ailments...
Even stranger, considering he was a model in some form, is the way in which he is oblivious to modern fashion and style. He claims to have brought fedoras back into style recently, as if to say nobody was wearing them until he started sporting cheap, mall-purchased hats with poor construction, either wearing them backwards, or floopy like a hobo. He is frequently seen in photos wearing such hats with dreadful slogan t-shirts the likes of which an 11 year old is too mature for. Slogans like "I'm here to lay pipe," and "This is what awesome looks like," as well as "I'm kind of a big deal" are all worn without the slightest hint of irony. For someone who goes to the "hottest nightclubs on the east coast," he certainly dresses more like he is prepared for a night at Chucky Cheese. 

Finally, Arthur Kade has had a few media interviews with outlets such as a Philadelphia news station, the Danny Bonaduce Radio Show, Philadelphia Magazine, and themensview.com among others. Each and every writer or journalist that did a piece about him portrayed him as a fame-seeking, celebrity obsessed person. Not once did any of these outlets praise him for acting ability or talent. If you're asking yourself why, it's obvious: he has no talent. His only talent is in showing the world that it is possible to be dumber, more disgusting, more self-centered, and more sexist than anyone we have ever met in our lives. 

It is for all these reasons that this blog exists. Should this walking nightmare achieve any level of success in the acting world, it will be at the expense of countless numbers of humble, talented, deserved actors and actresses who are spending untold hours practicing their skill and working hard so that they may one day have even a 5% chance of showing the world what they can do. Such people deserve that chance. Arthur Kade, on the other hand, deserves nothing. Everyone in the film industry will be better off for being warned about him. He stoops to the lowest depths imaginable with his freakish posts about such things as getting Jennifer Aniston pregnant, dreaming about hooking up with various actresses, and being responsibly for the breakup of Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo. His Kade Scale "rating system" for women is the pinnacle of inappropriate, sexist, misogynistic behavior. 

Be warned, be aware, and be very sure of one thing: Arthur Kade is destined for failure. We're just here to watch it. 

Finally, if you're wondering what "Lego Wig Kade" means in the first place... "Lego Wig" was a quick term coined by someone viewing arthurkade.com after his stepmom gave him a very silly haircut. The comment was made that he looked like he had lego hair; a great laugh was had by all, and that brief moment in time became the impetus for forming this blog. This hairstyle lasted no more than 36 hours, but for all of us it exists as a perfect moment of Arthur Kade being entirely oblivious to just how absurd and clueless he really is, and will forever be...

19 comments:

  1. Zack Morris of the band "Zack Attack"August 24, 2009 at 10:59 PM

    To whoever wrote that: Nicely done. It's perfect.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AK is a train wreck. The kind you can't stop watching. I do have a few questions...

    Why does he use the most unflattering camera angles for every video? Even novice models know their best angles and make sure they use them.

    Does anyone else find it impossible to watch his videos without concentrating on his hideous mouth? Every syllable appears exaggerated.

    The black felt fedora = the Demented Pinnochio
    Could it be his nose is growing?

    ReplyDelete
  3. "This person has protected their Tweets"

    hahahahahaha!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Protected your LEGOWIGKADE.BLOGSPOT.COM Tweets, LEGOWIGKADE.BLOGSPOT.COM huh Arthur? Coward. LEGOWIGKADE.BLOGSPOT.COM

    ReplyDelete
  5. Bitch needs to protect more than his tiny little tweets.

    Hangin'

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ha, now the Kade Scale portion on his site is unviewable.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Just one small correction to this otherwise well-written and comprehensive post...

    I can't speak to the clubs Arthur frequents in Philly and Atlantic City, but the places in NYC are pretty much third-tier bridge-and-tunnel emporia.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Whats bizzare is that he's kept it going for so long, then blows it by reacting to the heat. I even tried to warn him. Score: Redeeming = 0, Dead kittens = 1. People or persons that will verify he has had sex (excluding solo) = 0

    ReplyDelete
  9. I gave him a slap and it might have helped. For shits and giggles try posting again. He left my last comment alone. The one before... not so much. I'm going to test him a little, just to see if he gets it. After all, we need him, don't we? I'm like a junkie, if he's gone its detox city. Not yet, just a little more...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wo ist mein Handy?August 26, 2009 at 4:16 AM

    Joy! No more feeding the monkey with page views! Thank you MC!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Glory Be! Xanadu.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hi everyone! I love this site! I was aw fer crissakes, Hugh J Rection, small African child, and others on his site. Great job. The site looks fantastic. I had some great stuff that got deleted on his blog: will share it soon.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Clinical PsychologistAugust 28, 2009 at 1:19 PM

    You forgot to mention how his blatant objectification of women and vast lies of sexual conquest are an over-compensatory strategy for remaining in denial of what appear to be very homosexual themes.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Finally, somebody knows the Real Douche that he is, it started out as his pathological Lieing world now he just realizes everyone Hates him so he turned it up a notch

    ReplyDelete
  15. OMFG, thank you for this site! I've been observing this choad for months w/o posting, but I've enjoyed everyone elses. This venue is the best! I found it thanks to AK's link w/ dating goddess Amanda. keep the hate rolling.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Kade's whole thing is obviously a joke. We don't need your pathetic blog to help us see it. Sad, really.

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  17. Arthur Kade is an inspiration to us all. I find him quite sexy, and I think that he will become a great and successful actor if he perseveres and follows his dream (in spite of all the persecution and hate levied at him). Many weaker men would have caved a long time ago (thanks to all of your hate speech) but Arthur is following his calling. Go Arthur!

    ReplyDelete
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