Fan Mail From The U.K. (United Kadeom)

He. Brags. About. Almost. Sex. He also gets an e-mail from someone claiming to be from Oxford University who doesn't know the difference between YOUR and YOU'RE. Arthur Kadyshes is a real moron with no ability to differentiate between reality and fantasy, but we already knew this. God I hope he OD's this weekend. More bullshit from fin faced walking Ipecac, Arthur "rhymes with radishes" Kadyshes...

When you’re building an amazing “Global” influence like The Brand, you receive emails from around the planet, and it’s funny to see how HUGE Arthur Kade is getting in the U.K..(It’s incredible to know that many of the best actors are imported from the U.K, and the fact that I have built such a tremendous following there tells me that not only are my acting skills at almost Oscar level like some of their best like Hopkins, Thompson, and Olivier, but they appreciate the ushering in of “The Modern Actor”, and the “Kade Style” lifestyle I have developed while becoming a “Living Legend”), and I wanted to showcase a couple emails that I have received from The U.K., and prestigious universities like Oxford who absolutely worship “The Journey”. I also just booked an enormous audition that I will blog shortly, and the various lessons that I will be doing to prepare for it.  I have also included an email from a Kade Nation Member from outside Harrisburg, PA asking me for restaurant advice and I am answering it.

1) “greetings mr kade from northampton england! Just wanted to drop you a line to say i love the blog! Read it every day at work to get me through the boredom, and it always makes me laugh! Keep up the good work! There’s even a low but audible Kade buzz over here in the Uk now. You should totally come over here and turn the uk into the UKADE. anyway, i know you’re a busy man. Keep chasing the dream arthur. A man who doesn’t dream is not a man at all- if thats true, then you’re one hell of a man. All the best, Paddy.”

2)”hi arthur,
im writing from oxford university england, where your picking up a strong following. You really are global man! We love your work and the way you really LIVE and LOVE ‘the journey’. Will your new book be available in the uk or will we have to order a copy from the states.
peace and love man
kade-out”

3)Hi Arthur:

I need you to please tell me a really hot, upscale place to eat in Philadelphia, no sushi.  I love your blog and I totally trust your taste. Forever a fan of yours,

Jessica

Answer:

1) Buddakan (Asian Fusion)-my favorite restaurant in the city because the drinks are great, there usually some 20-25 year old Philly 9’s who if you buy a drink and show some charm, they may go in the bathroom and provide great oral sex, and the food is hot Asian Fusion, and the atmosphere and environment is very “Kadeish”.

2) Tinto (Tapas)-Amazing Tapas, and it is right off Rittenhouse so after you are done you can walk over to G Lounge and watch The Brand with some crazy ass all over him, and even buy him and The Entourage a drink or two to say thank you.  Atmosphere is very trendy, and I have been told that everybody there is a fan of “The Journey”, so you might want to mention your Kade Nation, and they might hook you up with extra food or alcohol.

3) El Vez (Mexican)-More of a younger crowd with good Mexican Food, and I will never forget when I went there with a girl after finishing class and we walked down to the bathrooms, and started making out and when she felt the bulge in my pants, I thought she may cum standing up because she told me that her boyfriend and her didn’t have much sex anymore.  It was so passionate, and then we killed Rosa Lunas to celebrate the night of almost sex we had.

4) Parc (French Bistro)-Right on the square, it is very similar to Pastis in NYC, and I would recommend the roasted chicken and escargot.  The Atmosphere is very NYC, and you can easily run into a celeb along the levels of Bruce Willis, Owen Wilson, Arthur Kade, and even Jack Nicholson.  It’s not as trendy, but a very solid choice, and you will easily run into coin chasing Cougars who are all looking for Ballers like The Brand and The Entourage, so be careful if you have a man that is horny and you’re giving him great sex.

By the way, if you are a Philly 9 or higher, then email me, and either I or one of my friends can make sure you have some fun, but I don’t think I have ever encountered a girl from that part of the state who is hot, so don’t bother if you’re not.

“Arthur Kade writes it.  They Hate it.  We Live It”…Arthur Kade…11/27/09

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A Night Of Giving Thanks To The Brand

Thanksgiving to me means just putting this up without reading it. I don't want to vomit up my turkey dinner. Too many pictures on his site for me to start pulling them off and putting them here also. I'll get around to this at some point later on Friday. I'm just guessing now, but I gotta imagine that this is more stupidity, lies and delusion from Arthur Kadyshes (rhymes with radishes)...

If I could unzip my “Kade-Suit”, step out of my amazing body, and just observe what hanging out with Arthur Kade is like, I think I would be amazed at what one friend last night called “The Kade Experience”, because everyone in The Entourage has become so accustomed to my “Kade Style” VIP domination when I go out that I have become jaded as to the affect that I have on people when they see the “One of the Premiere Socialites” of Philadelphia, NYC, and KA in action. Hanging out with Arthur Kade when he is killing it is like a roller coaster of amazingness, and last night, one lucky fan/Kade Nation Member, and new “Girl Cali BFF”, Molly Weiner (Sister of Jennifer Weiner, the author of “In Her Shoes” and “Good In Bed” who she told me was a fan of “The Journey” and I think it’s important for NY Times bestselling authors to stick together like us and critique eachother’s works to become better writers) got to see The Brand dominate the night, and her response at Del Frisco’s was “I have never seen anything like it (I wonder what it’s actually like to hook up with me and know that the penis of a celeb is inside of you and wonder if it intensifies the orgasm the girl gets). All the girls coming up and all the attention you get is crazy. You are a reality show in real life”. She got to see what some girls have nicknamed “Mr. Philadelphia” be the most famous person in the places, bypass lines, get free drinks, and get access to any parts of the club I want, and why people can see I am “The Biz’s newest Bad Boy and it’s next big thing”. I love when people experience the social part of “The Journey” first hand because there is nothing like it, and I always say, “If you want great sex, then call a porn star”.

Top 10 Moments of the night:

1) The random girl that I eyed up while walking by me and she literally stopped in her tracks at Del Frisco’s, started talking to me, and would have probably had sex with me in the bathroom had I desired, but she was a Philly 7.85 that I could tell was all about the fame and aura of The Brand, so after I saw that she had no ass and small tits, I told her I would meet her downstairs and never did. The Brand Doesn’t settle but I didn’t feel like telling her she wasn’t worthy of Arthur Kade.

2) Arthur Kade getting on my knees as a friend poured a shot of Patron in my mouth, and it pretty much spilled all over my hot TITS shirt (Which like 10 Gen Poppers came up to me to say something about), and everyone around me wondering, ‘How does Arthur Kade just always kill it?”.

3) While talking to a girl, I was trying to maneuver her into a threesome with another friend, but for some reason girls do not want to share me which is funny because for years I had no problem closing 2 girls in one night, although threesomes can be tricky because some girls get jealous at the attention you might show the other if she’s better in bed, and I had a situation years ago in Miami where a girl literally stopped in the middle of one and said, “I don’t think you guys need me here”, and got dressed and left the hotel room.

4) The Brand showing off his dance moves at Recess to one of the dancers, and my friend said, “You looked like you were having an epileptic seizure”, but I disagreed because I am good dancer, and said, “My moves are just ahead of their time”.

5) Arthur Kade never vomits from drinking too much, but in the cab on the way home, somehow as I was paying the cab driver, I threw up in the back and when I said ‘I’m sorry” he laughed and I gave him an extra $20 bill. The cab already smelled so bad so I didn’t feel that bad, but wanted to make sure that he knew he was escorting home a celebrity and brag about how much I tipped him

6) Me being walked in through the middle of the MASSIVE line at Del Frisco’s with The Entourage, while a fan kept yelling “Nation!!” (Short for I’m a member of Kade Nation). It’s funny because I knew and didn’t recognize him, but he told me he reads everyday and asked me “Did you get furniture?”, and I laughed and said “Not Yet. You really do read everyday.” Sometimes I forget that without Arthur Kade, The Gen Pop would not have a lot of inspiration and motivation during their lives and I can only imagine how miserable people were before “The Journey”.

7) At the bathroom at Recess, a Philly 8.88 with a great body, cute face, but busted nose (I was thinking about referring her to my old nose surgeon who removed the bump I had from the fifth break I had and made me look like an Italian/Roman statue, but she didn’t look like she could afford the surgery) said, “You’re a lot skinnier than I thought you would be”, and then I flexed my are and told her “Feel This”, and after she felt my bicep I told her “Feel This” and jokingly moved her hand over my pants and she said, ‘You’re hilarious”. It wasn’t meant to be “hilarious”.

8 ) One of The Entourage brought a girl over who I had offended one time at Smiths and told me to say sorry, and since I was already bombed and don’t remember the exact exchange, he said Arthur Kade said, “I apologize but I have no idea why I am apologizing, but I apologize anyway”. Classic Kade Interaction while trying to get my friends laid because I am a team player and sometimes I have to bunt so that others can score. There was also a girl who walked by The Brand at DelFriscos who said “You’re not cool”, and I responded, “Yes I am”. I thought I was going to get Gen Popped.

9) After getting home, I am babysitting 2 dogs, and they kept barking so I just started throwing the toy with them, and fell down my three steps to the living room and bruised my arm and back. I have been having a shooting pain going through my left arm for days now which I should get checked out, but I am scared that I may be having mini strokes and would rather not know

10) “Can I fuck Her?”. Best. Line. Ever

“If Fame and Success are like sex, than The Brand is a nymphomaniac…Arthur Kade…11/26/09

If only that was OJ's hand holding that knife...

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Lego Wig Kade Meet-up and A Holiday Season Charity Suggestion

We know many of the readers/commentors/tipsters of this blog are in far-flung parts of the US and even in other countries (Australia seems to be big for us, for some weird reason). We don't get to meet face to face often, if ever. However, a rare opportunity for charity and holiday greetings presents itself on December 22nd. For most of you, the trip to Philly isn't worth it, but if you're in Philly or its suburbs, or even if you're just back in the area for the holidays, you can catch some of the Lego Wig commenting crew that evening. We'll be starting off at a charity holiday concert. The proceeds go to MANNA, the Metropolitan Area Nutrition Network, a truly worthy cause that prepares and serves food to AIDS patients and their children/families. These are people whose families are very stretched, spending hours taking care of them through the worst of times. MANNA's year round services give them one less thing to do a few days a week, providing nutritious, home cooked food cooked in their Center City kitchen. Donations are taken at intermission and it's totally not necessary to donate more than $10 or $20--it all goes to a good cause and MANNA isn't the type of "charity" that throws extravagant parties, spending thousands on food and using large percentages of the "donations" to cover party planners, promoters, food, wine, etc. This is not some douchey "celebutard" event, it's really good music for a good cause. The scheduled soloists are fantastic and you don't need to be a huge fan of classical music to appreciate this event. Concert is not too long, in my experience it's about an hour and fifteen or twenty minutes.

I don't want to say too much right now about who will be there--I haven't had time to check if it's OK with our various contributors, commentators, or tipsters (some of whom are formerly Kade friends but now are among us laughing at him). I'll provide more information on that later. I'll just provide a link to the concert info here.

After the concert, we hope to convene and have a few brews at The Franklin Mortgage and Investment Company, the classy, laid back Philly bar that banned Kade. (Other coverage of the ban is here and here.) Some have suggested dressing like Kade (a classless douchebag with a cheap fedora), but I'd suggest you not do that and instead that we act like classy people and tip the bartenders well and pay our bill. I know I personally plan to thank the managers for banning Fin Face. I can't speak for everyone else, but I am the total opposite of Kadyshes, very laid back, don't want the spot light, and keep it low key. I assume most of our commenters are similarly chill people.

Post thoughts, suggestions, and plans in the comments. I sincerely hope some of you guys can make it out. More information will follow in later posts... just wanted to kick off the Thanksgiving festivities with a positive note instead of more Fin Faced Loser commentary.

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Celebrity “Katers”

Arthur, you're a deluded cunt. Kill yourself. More deluded ranting from the cunty Cock Gobbler, Arthur Kadyshes (rhymes with radishes)...

When you’re as polarizing, controversial, amazing, and well-known as Arthur Kade is, the one thing you have to deal with is Gen Pop and Celebrity “Katers” who seem to be so over-the top obsessed with you that they can’t sleep at night. The Brand and “The Journey” generate an emotional response from the public unlike anything “The Biz” has ever seen, and people have ventured as far as to say that Arthur Kade has created a new genre of acting/authoring/celebrity and most of all cultural boundaries, and with all pioneers there will always be discussion amongst the masses on change and how it affects our society. I never let the “Katers” bother me, especially when they are in the trenches of “The Biz” with me, but there is one situation which actually put a smile on my face the last few months because it’s an example of the jealousy of an individual who has bad mouthed me now for months, but also someone who has called me a “Genius” and “Brilliant” to my face multiple times, but yet somehow always has something negative to say about me behind my back. What’s even worse is that I don’t spend one percent of my day worrying about these people, but once in a while I feel like a Kadementary is needed for Kade Nation to know the power of The Brand.

One example of an intense “Kater” is Steve Ward, host of VH1’s Tough Love, who the first night he met me at a party at Barney’s for Philadelphia Style Magazine, badgered me in front of my father asking for video of me giving him my autograph, told me he was a HUGE Fan of “The Journey”, along with his Fam who he claimed “Read my site everyday”, whose mother left a voicemail on my site telling me that I should have my own reality show months ago (It’s still there), and then who saw Arthur Kade multiple times after that and sung his praises about what he had created and how genius, unique, and brilliant it was. I am not even in KA or NYC, and everyone in those towns and around the world follows “The Journey”, and when I walk the street in my Hometown of Kadeadelphia, everyone knows who Arthur Kade is and the POWER his blog carries and what he is on the verge of achieving.

For months, all I have heard from people is how he has bashed and insulted me, and all I would do is laugh and think, “It took you a TV show to become someone. I am already someone without one, totally self-made, and have as many people or more in “The Biz” who know who The Brand is as you do, like actors, producers, authors, and celebs, and I haven’t even started my full blown onslaught of taking ‘”The Biz”" by the throat and dominating it with my hit TV Show and Book. Arthur Kade hasn’t even begun to unveil his bag of goodies to the world yet, and when he does he will be the biggest name in America, and instead of yapping about me, watch and learn a kid who grew up in poverty do the impossible and achieve a level of fame and awards in The Craft that only the greats have seen. The Gen Pop and the world are watching a person who would rather go to his grave than fail, and looks at people who “Hate”, and turns them into believers, but the truth is that you are already a believer and for some reason it eats you up inside watching The Brand succeed at the rate and power he is or else you wouldn’t constantly talk about me. People should never Talk down to me, but instead Look up at me, because Arthur Kade is poetry in Motion, and he is even more driven by people who seem to have an intense need to obsess over him.

No one has ever had 1/10th the balls, the heart, or the brains to create what I have from literally scratch, leave a six figure career and picture perfect life with no Plan B, and put his life on the line for a dream, and when history is told, I will be looked at as someone who was so forward thinking and revolutionary that I midas will nickname myself “The Constitution” now. If you threw me in a room with five hot KA 10’s and another guy competing, I would close the hottest 3, pass the ugliest one on to the guy to shut him up, and tell the last one that I am tired, and then fuck her twice in the morning while the others watched. I have more vagina thrown at my face than Don Juan, and I turn it down because I only eat the best caviar in the world because Kade Nation expects nothing less from their hero, and that is a will power that no one in the Gen Pop can ever understand. I am a form of belief and struggle on the level of MLK Jr., JFK, George Washington, and Nelson Mandela. I am Arthur “Mothafuckin” Kade and what people think, I’m already “Off That”!

“Arthur Kade is Michael Jordan in the 92′ Finals, Muhammad Ali in “The Rumble In the Jungle”, Bobby DeNiro in Raging Bull, Roger Federer at Wimbledon, Jay-Z in the Blueprint, Shakespeare writing Hamlet, and Pamela Anderson on Tommy Lee’s cock. He is an anomaly of nature that shits greatness and pisses excellence, and then decides who will Flush. Arthur Kade is the very definition of living at peak performance with a Ducati engine in a Bentley Body. No One can match “Kade Style”, so don’t ever forget it.”…Arthur Kade…11/24/09

Two Nobodies.

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The Secret Society

I used to work in "The Biz" and I can tell you all, most people NEVER use the term "The Biz" and NOBODY has ever referred to anyone in "The Biz" as a "Bizzer." Arthur Kadyshes is so far from being in "The Biz" that if he got a job ripping tickets at a movie theater he'd be about 10 steps closer to being in "The Biz" than he is now. 

I know we all speculate as to his mental illness and what exactly it is, but the more I go on reading this asshole the more I'm convinced I will never understand the depths to which a human mind can sink. How can someone tell lie after lie after LIE and still believe every single one of them? It doesn't matter how many people call him out in the comments or on Twitter he just goes on like nothing is amiss. You'd think it would eventually get to him, but it just doesn't and in his case this isn't persistence, but SEVERE fucking mental illness. Plenty of people have faced rejection or adversity and overcome it, but Arthur Kadyshes will never be anything more than what he is now: a fucking loser surrounded by more losers. Yeah, I'm looking at YOU, Chad, Lindsay and Sabrina.

More crazy ass balls ass crazy fucking delusional speak from Cock Gobbling Arthur Kadyshes... (oh, and pictures of food.)

When you’re a growing International media superstar like Arthur Kade in the amazingly cutthroat “Biz” it turns your stomach that you just can’t always share everything going in Kadealot with Kade Nation, and make them feel the same orgasm of success that I feel everyday I continue to re-create “The Biz”. A HUGE Fan came up to me at Cosi yesterday and asked, “I’m dying to know, What’s the book about?”, and I responded, “I can’t talk about it, but I will say it’s unlike anything you have read before, and there is no doubt that it will win awards and be a NY Times Bestseller”, and as he walked away, all The Brand kept thinking to himself is, “I wish I could talk about all the stuff I have going on with all the multitude of projects and press I’m working on because they are so brilliant and unique that I think people’s heads would explode”, but in “The Biz” it is important that you keep things close to your vest with business sometimes because you can’t ruin an ongoing situation or negotiation. I was telling my friend yesterday, “It’s like knowing you’re banging Megan Fox, and yet you can’t tell anybody about it, not even you’re friends, even though you know she gives the best oral sex, and you just want to brag that I had her”. The beauty of Arthur Kade is that he shares every aspect of his life through “The Journey”, but sometimes even the original “Modern Actor” has to hold back on announcements because there is a business component that forces him to abide by things like “Confidentiality Clauses” and celebs or important “Bizzers” (What we people in “The Biz” call each other) who will get in contact with me, but write, “Please do not put this on your blog” all the time, and this is the side of “The Biz” that the everyday Gen Popper who grabs a Miller Lite with his friends at a dive bar and talks about The Eagles can never experience. I Feel like I am living in a secret society where only a select few know the truth, and they are celebs like me, and other members are Tom Hanks, Steve Speilberg, Ridley Scott, Brad Pitt, and other “A-Listers”.

It’s now getting to a point in my rising acting and authoring career where I am beginning to realize that I can’t really trust anyone outside of The Entourage and La Famiglia, because all Gen Poppers want to be me, and will do whatever it takes to copy or destroy the aura of greatness and innovation that I am creating, and it’s crazy that in many ways, becoming an “A-List” celeb and having sex with a hot girl is so similar. Hot girls almost all want to be taken care of, especially once they hit 30, they are all looking for a “Pimp Kade” to “Wife Them” that they will somehow conveniently forget to take the pill, have a condom waiting for you that has a hole in it, or even not let you pull out when you’re about to cum, and in “The Biz” the affect is the same because when you are a rising superstar/actor/author/celeb/blogger/model after 8.652 months, everybody is trying to get into your pants of success, and you question every new person coming into your life, and what their purpose is and how they will “Put a hole in your condom” to completely fuck you. This is why I don’t hook up almost ever over 30 anymore, because there is a level of jadedness that you don’t find in a girl that is 25 or under where you can train and mold her to your requirements.

I was talking to Papa Kade last night about being a celebrity over dinner, and he said, “You’re being paranoid”, and I said “You have no idea what it’s like to be Arthur Kade now. Anywhere I go or don’t go, people are looking for me and think they see me. I am the topic of conversation everywhere, and I may be the most polarizing young celebrity on the planet right now. People use my “”Kadeisms”", want to be in videos with me, ask me about the TV Show or Book non-stop, and girls are all trying to sleep with me because they know I’m famous, that sometimes it’s hard to know who’s real and who’s not”. Now I know why many of my fellow celebs live very secluded lives, because you just want to feel safe, and have sex with random 9’s or 10’s all day in a country where no one knows who you are (Think the episode of Entourage where Vinnie and crew go to Mexico after “Medellin” failed and don’t want to come back to the stress of KA), although with the Global Icon status I am quickly achieving with the popularity of “The Journey”, I will soon not even be able to vaca in Africa without fans greeting me like they did Muhammad Ali when he fought George Foreman in Zaire for “Rumble In The Jungle”. Fame is amazing, but it really is a double-edged sword because while you’re making millions, people are all counting each dollar and trying to get their share like what just happened to my man, Nick Cage

In the meantime, I think I have decided on my new headshot, and it is one that shows a less “Italian Mobster” look that Hollywood knows me for now, and more of an inviting “Leave It To Beaver” sort of effect. I wanted to show casting directors that I can play “Happy” and “Sensual” characters as well as “Dark” and “Intense” ones, so I selected this smiling one to show that (It’s already airbrushed), and a more serious one that still needs to be “Touched Up”. I think this shot shows my beautiful Green eyes, great head of hair. the profile of my nose looks very “Romanesque”, my teeth look perfect, and it’s very “Casual Suave” and I look like the Boy Next Door. I would love to hear from Kade Nation what they think?

“Most Gen Poppers want to climb Mt. Everest. Arthur Kade wants to travel to other Solar Systems. That is true greatness.”….Arthur Kade…11/24/09

The will be VERY disappointed when you walk in and look NOTHING like this headshot.

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Sabrina "The Gunt" Strickland turns 33 this week, owes money for criminal fines and rent

Sabrina "The Gunt" Strickland, bff of douchebag misogynist Arthur "Fin Face" Kadyshes has bad judgment. She follows Kade around on nights of drinking and whatever other mood-enhancing substances he uses. She enables Kadyshes to live some teenage girl fantasy where he's in "exclusive" VIP areas. She condones Kade's comments about women, despite the fact that she violates all of Kade's supposed rules about "acceptable" females. She is aging, she looks beaten down by life (she was very plain looking to begin with), she has a shitty job (selling houses for N. Paone in this economy, ha ha ha), and she sounds like a man when she talks. And who could forget the gunt she has... or, as Kade would so eloquently say, "the vagina-stomach connector bump". So here's to you, Sabrina, you're a hopeless middle aged loser like Arthur Kadyshes.

Prior to today, we knew most of the above information. However, several tipsters have alerted The LWK Blog to some truly hilarious information about Strickland. Pennsylvania Public Safety Records show that The Gunt was arrested and plead GUILTY to drug possession with intent to distribute and also plead guilty to criminal conspiracy (being involved in the selling of drugs with other people). She served 2 years of probation, pissing into a cup and trying to lay off the drugs. (Click here to read the criminal court information on Sabrina Strickland, including the collection action by the state for her unpaid fines.)Based on seeing the videos with her and Kade and listening to her man voice... it didn't work.

But this story is like an early Christmas gift that keeps on givin'... turns out that Strickland never paid off the $800+ in fines to the State of Pennsylvania. Court records show that her situation was referred to a collections agency (see page 4 of this) earlier this year, perhaps as part of Pennsylvania's belated gift to Sabrina for her 32nd birthday. So here we have a beaten down 33 yr old who is, on top of all that, poor. She goes out and parties with Kadyshes, but can't pay off her criminal fines. Wrecked credit, wrecked health, wrecked life.

It's also looking very likely that Gunt is the very same Sabrina Strickland who owes over $4000 in back rent to Dobson Creek Apartments... we're looking into that to confirm it.
Sabrina, life has been difficult to you, honey... take some advice. Since FinFace (you know, the guy whose name rhymes with "Radishes") was a "wealthy financier" before setting out to win "Little Oscar", hit him up for a loan. Just don't use the $$ for alcohol and drugs, sweetie.

-- Oh, and happy 33, homegirl! --

Coming up soon: What court documents show about Leonard "Papa Kade" Kadyshes' sexual harassment record, an insider's thoughts on why Raya Yukhimov has no style, and an analysis of Lindsay J. Furman's role in the Kadyshes farce. Stay tuned, kids.

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The Brand in Playgirl?

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Lisping Douchebag Arthur Kadyshes now has the #2 Blog About His own Failed Life

We started this blog slightly over 3 months ago in response to the censorship of the truths being posted at Lispy McSlobberfuck's own blog. In the last week or so, we've been waiting for Alexa to come out with 3 month statistics for the blog, to see how we're doing vs Kade, despite using just our brainpower, a few mins a day and letting people comment openly on the embarassment over at The Cockgobbler's own blog. The 3 month stats are out and our blog, bashing Lispy McSlobberfuck, formerly known as Arthur Kadyshes, has better statistics than Kade's own blog. This is particularly pathetic because Kade's life is laid bare on this blog... one embarassment after another, one pathetic self-picture after another. Kade's still the same insecure, fame-seeking guido dirtbag he was almost a year ago when his life fell apart and he set off on "The Journey". By contrast, we spend a few minutes a day a few days a week reading emails, corresponding with tipsters, and adding commentary to surround Kade's own poorly written and heavily-embellished posts. (Even though it doesn't take much time, it often causes headaces to read the blogs... it's hard to tell who writes worse, Kade, King Kang, or publicist to internet failures everywhere, Lindsay Furman.)

Kadouchebag has been blogging for 9+ months. What does he get in return for spending hours harassing women for pictures, filming his horrible failed acting attempts, and cooking up new lies to broadcast in blog form? Free t-shirts from the kind of clothing companies that operate only online and have great "Buy 3, get 2 free" sales. Oh, and some invites to D-list parties that his enablers Kang and Furman get tickets to. Wow... "amazing"!

In the last month, we've been contacted by some Ph.D. students looked to do a documentary and, even more recently, by an investor looking for a way to get an interesting show and sell ads based on the Philly Phailure himself and his scant squad of loser hanger-ons. The end result is, unlike ugly, greasy, lisping, lying 30-something sociopath Arthur Kade, we're going to be putting a Web-based TV series together, backed by enough capital to do it correctly. The show will be about the pathetic 30-something-going-on-white-trash-guido-teenagers Arthur Kadyshes and his accomplices. Arthur's made the info public, sought fame based on it, and we'll be happy to oblige, help our investors make their money back, and split the web ad revenues. We've received, and will be accepting, an offer from a private equity firm, to work with a small (but extremely helpful) budget to build a viral serial expose about a group of infamy-obsessed douchebags from a blue collar city. If you live in Philly or have connections to any of Kade's players, it would help a lot. The way we envision this, for the time being, is sort of a "Real Losers of Philadelphia"... aging, know-nothing, drugging/drinking, club-going losers who don't have the money or hard-working husbands that the "Real Housewives" have.

In the end, we'll be centering on FinFace Kadyshes (rhymes with "radishes", by the way). However, we need to feature others--how could Kadyshes really accomplish all his "fame" (ha ha ha) without the help of lingerie football lineman/surgically-enhanced radio co-honest GN Kang to book radio interviews with "Kade Nation" (ha ha ha)? How could he get into exclusive guido events with A-List (ha ha ha) celebs like Audrina whatshername without the help of not-quite-literate-but-totally-desperate Lindsay J. Furman? Who else would hang around Lipsy except for a socially inept midget like Chad G. Boonswang? And don't worry, Kade didn't involve his dad and step mom fruitlessly--we won't forget the creators of the Lego Wig haircut... Raya and Leonard. How about "The Gunt" Strickland (Kade loves the word Gunt, we'll feature it in his writings and help him popularize it while also becoming more mocked and hated)? Some will be bit players, but that's what made Seinfeld great, right? The small characters really add a lot. Both Sharons, we thank you for taking Kade's money, but if we have our way, you will become a little more infamous in Philly for being teachers/enablers of this collosal "waste of cumb". Since he has no talent, you're basically stealing his money, which would normally be ethically bad. However, the more money you take from him, the less he has to go live on and thus the faster he'll end up broke on a street corner rather than just broke sleeping in a pile of dirty clothes in a totally mediocre apartment. Lastly, Ron Hansen... you housed Kade for a while in your den/office... shame on you for helping him save money, but thank you for the epic laughs at that whole living situation. We hope you show up in Kade's life in the future, because we wouldn't want to leave you out.

With this modest influx of money (we're only talking about 5 figures total for the first installments of the show, which will be an internet short-show format) we will be able to follow Kade's journey in a combination format of "The Soup" and the "Real Housewives" fashion... using Kadyshes' own past abominations, along with original commentary, parody, satire, mash ups of Kade's moronic videos which is covered by the copyright doctrine of "Fair Use", hypothetical situations using improv actors with real talent, etc.

If you want to help with the web show--or even spearhead it--get in touch with us. This isn't going to happen overnight, but it will surely happen before Kadouchebag wins "Little Oscar"... since that is NEVER happening. Kevin Brueck, if you're reading this... get in touch. Your slam parodies of Douchekade inspired us all.

The best part of this is, it will help make Artzitz even more unmarketable, once the truth gets out and people can dial up Youtube of Vimeo and see what's really up. At the same time, we'll earn a modest amount off some minimal advertising and also establish a foot hold on the REAL story behind the spectacular failure of Kadyshes, et. al. So when something truly crazy happens, we'll have the credibility to write the book on Arthur Kadyshes' douchebag "Journey" and douchebag-enabling nontourage.

God bless you all for helping in this cause. Thank you to our financial backers. We understand that you had to wait to see the numbers. And we'll be working 100% to deliver a good product (that's a lie, since Kadyshes expends most of the effort and we just add a small amount of brainpower to laugh at the douchebaggery).  Have a great week, all you Legowig Fans!

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For those of you that want stats--
LWK Blog's page views are up 60% in the past month (AK's blog is down during that period).

LWK Blog's page views are up 26,000% in the past 3 months (AK's blog has dropped almost 70% in that period).

LWK Blog's page views per user are up 300% in the past 3 months (AK's blog has dropped 50% in that period).

Only 3.5% of LWK Blog users limit their visit to 1 page (our "Bounce" rate). The AK blog has a rate 10% that high. More importantly, more people stick around to read what we have to say... our bounce rate is down 75% in the last month. Not only do we have more fans than Kade, ours stay around to listen to our view.

LWK Blog's "Reach" (% of internet users who read our blog) has increased 70% in the past month and 7,400%  past 3 months).

Full stats are up on Alexa.com at this link.

Keep in mind, we do this as a team of about 10 people, spending no more than a few minutes here and there each. We love our commentators and tipsters--your comments, emails, and word of mouth have made this blog a success. Thank you for your efforts. We promise to deliver more of the truth about this failure/trainwreck. Thanks for coming along for the ride!

read more “Lisping Douchebag Arthur Kadyshes now has the #2 Blog About His own Failed Life”

The Aborted Artest

Why is it that Cock Gobbler is always "debating on having one of my reps contact his people"? Oh, I know, because if he said, "I'm going to contact [insert celebrity's name] people so I can get an answer to [insert stupid question here]" we'd be able to call him out on another lie. Arthur Kadyshe's is nothing more than a fraud; a liar who will never do ANY of the things he claims he's going to do. At best, and I mean the VERY FUCKING BEST, this asshole will get on some douchebag reality show. In my mind that's the worst thing in the world. How sad is that? His Mt. Everest would be my Death Valley. Pathetic. Fuck him, fuck Papa Boris Badenov, fuck Raya Salon and Natasha. More bullshit and delusion from the stinking maw of lying asswipe Arthur Kadyshes...

I have been visually preparing for tonight’s amazing Fashion Show at Recess hosted by The Nouveau Image and Raya Coiffure (I am being told by my “Insiders” that the show will be the biggest in Philly for the season, and there are a ton of local and global celeb guests coming like Arthur Kade) all day, and have actually put The Craft on hold today to focus on the image and trend that I want to set for Fall/Winter 2010 for the Fashion World, and had my hair done today to start Step 1 of the process of new celebrity trends. I will tell you the one style I wanted to do that my step mom vetoed because even-though it would be an amazing statement maker for someone of my stature in “Young Hollywood” to sport, it might be a poor reflection on “The Journey” where all of the “A-List” authors, artists, actors, and producers who read this blog may take me less seriously and think of me more as a growing celeb/political icon than a rising actor. Arthur Kade has to be careful because The Goal of “The Modern Actor” is to be taken seriously, and I walk a fine line where I may be viewed more as a entertainer/celeb than a seriously talented actor.

My Favorite player in the NBA right now is Ron Artest. Any man that will go into the stands and fight the crowd of Haters throwing drinks at him gets a huge “Kade Style” shout out from The Brand, but I also love how he is one the most controversial and polarizing players in “The League”, but still one of the most talented, hardest working, and respected at his craft. In many ways, he is the “Arthur Kade of the NBA”, and to this year he signed with my favorite team, and future hometown boys, the KA Lakers. He is a perfect example of a player/artist who does it his own way, and I was telling one of my friends on the phone today, “I love Artest. He’s Balls Ass hot right now, and if I copied his look there is no doubt in my mind you would see some big actors jumping on the KadeWagon. He’s a 6′9″, Black version of Arthur Kade. I think I totally have a “”Man-Crush on Ron Artest”"”.

In the season opener, he had some designs shaved into his head that I thought were really cool, and I thought that you rarely see a white artist of my caliber attempt something so “Fashion Forward” and “Fresh”, so my thoughts today when I walked into my parent’s salon was I was going to unite Hip Hop with “The Modern Actor”, and have my step mom shave either “Kade” into my hair, or even “The Brand”. I wanted to pay homage to my nickname, but my step mom talked me out of it saying that it might be an idea that’s too ahead of it’s time, and that I would definitely have to shave my head if I wanted to correct it which I wasn’t sure I wanted to do. Here is my morning getting to the salon after not staying at my own house, and then the beginning of the hair change over, but I won’t show you the finished result because I don’t want to ruin the surprise for tonight for The Gen Pop so stay tuned to my next blog.

“Arthur Kade doesn’t need to be the “”Center Of Attention”". He needs to be the “”Center of The Kadeiverse”…Arthur Kade…11/21/09

Also, A Kade Nation Fan sent me a picture of Derek Jeter in Page 6 of the NY Post (Who is probably a HUGE Fan of “The Journey”) doing what he thinks is an impression of my beloved character, “The Kween” hanging out with his girlfriend Minka Kelly in St. Barts (I have always had her as an NYC 8.2 because she looks so sexy on “Friday Night Lights” in a “College freshman you want to be the first to “”Break The Seal”" on when she goes away to school” way, but the more I break her down, she is short, has saggy tits in the pic here, and has that “Texas Nose” that I can’t stand where the nose turns upward and looks horrible, so I am reducing her to a 7.88). I’m debating having one of my “Reps” contact his team, and find out if that is the case. Here is the pic, so I’ll let my Global Audience be the judge:

I'm going to guess you're in Chad's bed waiting for him to ram you from behind.

This video is the reason some people hate immigrants.

One horrendously ugly mother fucker.

read more “The Aborted Artest”