"Lego Wig" Arthur Kade: The Journey (to a Mental Institution): 2010-01-03

1/6/10

U D S - Some Nonsense About Kade Evolving From An Ugly Childhood

We've not even read this yet, but saw the words "I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before" and completely spit out hot chocolate.

While having an amazingly fun din with my old roommate of 2 years, and one of his friends at The Piazza in No-Libs last night (This is hipster central, and after Arthur Kade’s “Kade Style” domination of their unofficial headquarters, “The Brandbary” (The Barbary) last month, I truly feel like their is a cross-culture respect between Kade Nation and the Hipsters to where they eye me now, and truly understand all that I am accomplishing with “The Biz” and “The Journey”), we were recanting all of the memories that we enjoyed while living together in my old house. We have always shared a symbiotic relationship, because we both have admittedly grew up as “The Ugly Duckling”, and then turned into drop dead gorgeous NYC models who could have any girls we desired, but at the same time we had to deal with the pain and torture of being the best looking, most charming, and most desired man in any room, and this will always bring out The Haters in full effect, and when I cam home, I was sent a picture of what The Brand looked like at 6 years old (Not to seem arrogant, but Arthur Kade was maybe the most handsome and lovable kid I have ever seen, and it is a shame that Papa and Mama Kade didn’t unite to make me a movie or TV Star then because I could have been the original Haley Joel Osment or Dakota Fanning) , and it really got me thinking about how a theory I call U.D.S., or the “Ugly Duckling Syndrome”, and how it affects stars and celebrities like Arthur Kade.

If you look at some of the most famous stars in the world like myself, many of them were very average looking or shy in high school, and then blossomed as time went on, and I can honestly admit that I was very average looking in high school because I was so poor that I wore the same clothes every day, never got haircuts, wore my grandmother’s socks, and bought clothes at discount shops (I was a future superstar living in the Gen Pop world and the Gen Pop let me know it by always making fun of me, snickering when I walked by, and talking about how I would be in the Food Stamp line with all the kids that were bused in), and then I was romantically linked in high school to the prettiest girl in my high school (She was so hot at that time that cars would stop in the middle of the street to check her out, and the Gen Poppers in my school would say, “I can’t believe Arthur landed her, he is the fucking man”, but the truth is that we were just friends), and that’s when it all changed and Arthur Kade went from loser to “King of Kadealot”. The amazing fact of the matter is that all the kids that were considered “Cool” in high school are either married and miserable, in jail, or complete Gen Pop losers.

I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before, and living with an unabated anger to be the best, and the rest is history, and now here is The Brand on the verge of becoming the “Biggest Star in Hollywood”, but the lesson that is to be taken away is that U.D.S. is truly a good thing if utilized correctly. For Arthur Kade, it was that constant pain that prepared me to never care what other people say (Hence, why I almost never read comments on my site, or care what “The Katers” think), and that drive to prove everyone wrong and do the impossible is what made me a “Living Legend” in my old company, and put me on the verge of super-stardom in “The Biz” today. The more the Gen Pop tells Arthur Kade he can’t the more he knows he can. Everybody loves the underdog, and Arthur Kade and “The Journey” are the true definition of people around the world cheering and following someone who would rather die than not achieve the impossible, and it is that passion and desire which has led many to compare me to the Muhammad Ali of my generation.

U.D.S. is also great when it comes to girls, because many girls who are not hot in high school or college would find ways to become more proficient at luring hot guys by developing better oral sex techniques, learning to be better in bed, and release their jealousy of the hot girls by giving gorgeous men like myself a treat to prove their worth. Once those ugly to average girls become hot, they have this insecurity so ingrained in them that now you get the total package of hot girl and great sex, so I have always joked with friends, “Ask her what she looked like in high school so you can see if she was the spoiled prom queen and will be a “”Dead Fish”", or if she grew into herself and will be the “”Hungry Lion”"”. That is the knowledge that makes Arthur Kade a god of opposite sex brilliance.

The next month or two has so many surprises in store for Kade Nation that I can hardly stop from getting an erection in Kade’s Corner, and my arrival to Sundance will be the stuff where legends are made.

“Growing up In poverty wasn’t a disadvantage, it was Arthur Kade’s winning lottery ticket to brilliance and orgasm”…Arthur Kade…01/06/09

Here is the level of transformation that occurred in The Brand from childhood to high school to Rising Celebrity in KA:

1/5/10

The Beast Is Back - Arthur's Body Continues To Look Like Garbage

What in the hell does any of this mean?? "Transforms from a Category 2 Tropical Depression?" Also Kade, we're all for you taking up Matt Beauchamp on his offer to prove that you can bench 255. We all know you are lying, so put up or shut up. Beauchamp asked for a video of you lifting 255 lbs once, but we want a video of you doing a 10 reps at 255 lbs. Not one rep, but a full set of 10. Let's see it. Lifting weight once doesn't mean shit if you can't rep it. You're an ugly, untalented, unemployed liar. We won't pay you anything for doing either, we just want to offer you an opportunity to prove something for once.

As Arthur Kade transforms from a Category 2 Tropical Depression Over The Atlantic to the Category 6 Hurricane Kade that will be invading, dominating, captivating, and embracing the Sundance Film Festival, “The Journey” is living in the gym (When I saw what my face and neck looked like on NYE, and how FAT I looked, it was a wake up call that a future TV/Movie/Literary star as Arthur Kade can not mail it in like Gerry Butler who has put on 50Lbs. since 300), boxing, playing basketball and soccer, and doing what needs to be done to get back in the shape I can be in these pics below (I also have a contest going with a girlfriend of mine around this, so there is ZERO chance I lose to a girl!!). One of The Entourage who saw me benching 255 Lbs. last night at the gym said, “Holy Shit, The Old AK is back”, and I have been doing 2 a days since NYE and am like an absolute beast right now. It’s on like Kade Kong because when The Brand is in shape, he has one of the best bodies in the world!!!!! I will be detailing The Brand’s workout shortly and Arthur Kade will be the talk of Hollywood at Sundance, plus there is a chance my Cali BFF and Kade Nation Super Fan, Kent Osborne will also be there so we can have a “Kade Style” reunion, so I want to look like he remembers me from my KA domination in June.
“I wonder if Jerry Rice would want to work out with a celeb like Arthur Kade for some publicity?”…Arthur Kade…01/06/09

Before you watch the new videos, let's refresh your memory on this very honest critique of Kade's body from an actual trainer, from back on August 6, 2009. If anything, Kade's body has gotten worse, and, knowing the complete lack of dedication he has to anything, it should be expected that he will not improve much about his body. He looked terrible back then, he looks worse now, and he just doesn't have the ability to change in the time that he thinks he can change.

New Videos:

These next two photos are so completely hideous, there are just no words for it.

Look people! Kade finally realizes that he smells like shit and sweats like a pig, that his breath smells like an old cum rag, and he's trying to do something about it!

Arthur's Big Announcement - He's Going to Sundance as a Wannabe Actor

Arthur teased for an entire day about some big announcement yesterday, and in the end it was simply that he's going to the Sundance Film Festival at the end of this month - something anyone can buy tickets to attend. He wasn't invited. Instead, since he thinks he's a celebrity and part of Hollywood, he thinks he's going to go there and "compare notes about “The Journey” with fellow stars from “Old and Young Hollywood” like Robert Redford, Zac Effron, Paris Hilton, and Joel Schumacher." Yeah, seriously, he wrote that. A guy who has never acted in anything, never spoken a single line in any movie, calls these people "fellow stars." Not only that, he also thinks that various industry people are going to be interested in an as yet undeveloped, unfilmed, unseen TV show that he lies about constantly and has the nerve to call a hit, not to mention an unwritten, unpublished, unread book that he constantly calls a New York Times Bestseller.
Grab a garbage bag, because you're about to throw up.

Many Gen Poppers have been asking The Brand as to why he skipped leaving town for an amazing and extravagant trip on NYE like he normally would (Last Year was amazing trip to Kadeami where on NYE I partied with Macy Gray and Jared Leto at The Setai and Mokai), and I have been promising that “The Year Of The Brand” would have many surprises to tickle the underbelly’s of Kade Nation around the globe (This is just the first with me unwrapping another special gift for The Gen Pop in a few weeks), and the first answer to both of those questions is now unveiled. Anyone in “The Biz” knows that the long-running Sundance Film Festival is regarded by movie makers as the most famous and premiere Indie film festival in Kademerica, and now one of “The Biz’s” fastest rising stars as an actor, author, and talent, Arthur Kade, will be in attendance. The Brand will be attending the first week of the festival (All people in “The Biz” know that The first week is the one that features all of the “A-List Talent, so I wanted my fellow “Crafters” to get the chance to meet me) with many of his “A-List” peers on The Craft and Directorial side, and it will mark the beginning of a new era for the festival with the attendance of such a rising and polarizing star, and I actually joked with one of The Entourage tonight at dinner, “If people thought Vinnie Chase had a great time in the land of “”Hollywood on Ski’s”", wait until they see the recipe Arthur Kade will be cooking up there”.

The Sundance Film Festival will be taking place in Park City, Utah starting January 21st, and it will be amazing to sit down and compare notes about “The Journey” with fellow stars from “Old and Young Hollywood” like Robert Redford (The Founder Of the festival who I would love to talk to about my unique career path, and how many “Bizzers” believe Arthur Kade will revolutionize the modern acting world and maybe even give some advice to other up and coming actors), Zac Effron, Paris Hilton, Joel Schumacher and others that will be attendance, and I am curious to see all of the potential mega-attention that I get from agents, publicists and fellow Talent asking me about the revolutionary hit TV Show that I have been building with IMG Media for months, and how the authoring of my NY Times Bestseller is going with Trident Media Group, as well as comparing notes with fellow “Bizzers” on the various projects we are all working on at the moment for 2010, plus it will give The Brand a chance to meet and network with well known producers and directors who probably know who Arthur Kade is already after only 10.0012 months into “The Journey”, and perhaps even get a deal done to deliver lines or star in one of their up-coming movies (I was telling another friend today when I finalized the trip, “How cool would it be to have someone just say, “”I think Arthur Kade would be a great fit in my next movie. I wonder if he’s interested?”"”).

The other part of Sundance outside of the ability to see the movies and stars of tomorrow like myself, is that it is one of the great Hollywood party events of the year because every night there are exclusively sponsored parties and satellite clubs featuring fellow celebs and performers (I wouldn’t be surprised to see Usher or Alicia Keys hit the stage to sing), and the hottest tail from KA and NYC comes in for the skiing, snowboarding (I don’t really snowboard anymore because years ago while in doing it in Jackson Hole I hurt my ankle and ended up having a stress fracture that required 6 weeks to heel), and ability to meet future TV/Movie/Author stars like an Arthur Kade. It will be great to meet girls at parties in the village, or on the slopes, and bring them back for private Jacuzzi parties or a brilliant night of “Kadeing”.

Either way, this will be a bit of a coming out party for The Brand where many KA “Bizzers” who have been dying to meet him will now get their chance, and relationships will hopefully be built that will help me continue to redefine The Craft, “The Biz”, and take “The Journey” to new heights, as well as potentially meet a KA 9 or 10 to have some fun nights with that can be my “Cali-Girl”. I am also looking forward to building relationships with The Press and Papparazzi (I have been featured already on sites like The Insider and USA Today, but I would like to extend my reach further to People and US Weekly) there that will be covering The Brand for years to come, and many of them will be hearing about “The Journey” for the first time.

“The Craft evolves with it’s artists, and Arthur Kade is it’s New Darwin”…Arthur Kade…01/04/09

1/4/10

The Toy, or, Arthur Kade Thinks He Is God's Gift To Women

Not much to say for an intro to Arthur's latest post. He thinks that doctors and lawyers and accountants drive Hyundais, eat quesadillas, and drink beer. Quick question: what the hell is wrong with quesadillas and beer??? On the flipside, who actually sits around and drinks champagne and eats caviar? Arthur Kade is so up-his-ass delusional with so many stereotypical situations that it never fails to amaze us. He's back at Cosi because he's too cheap to get Internet service in his apartment. This post is just beyond dumb... Kade can think he's a sex symbol all he wants, but a year of going home along to stroke it and blow his load on his nonexistent abs says otherwise!

It’s Monday Morning, its an amazingly early morning at Kade’s Corner at Cosi, and the official “The Year Of The Brand” has begun with Philadelphia’s most famous actor getting back to the grind, but as I work closer and closer to “Biggest Star In the World” status, and collector of the rare animal Arthur Kade calls “Lil’ Oscar”, I can’t help but recall the experiences that The Brand has had with girls the last couple months, and how they have shaped his psyche in understanding his own role to the opposite sex. Considering I have always been a successful business man, the hottest of hot girls have always wanted to get “Wifed” by me, but now that I am as one “Bizzer” called me, a “Cult Celebrity” (Him and I argued that I was mainstream because I am in the seven figs of Gen Poppers who follow “The Journey”) and rising International Sex Symbol, I have noticed a HUGE change in how girls look at me, and Arthur Kade is no longer “Hubbie Material”, but instead I have become “The Toy”. To understand the different classes girls look at guys at here are some popular definitions of different pinholes that we get put into:

1) The Toy-This is the guy who is usually gorgeous and “Mr. Popularity” like myself, that hot girls look at and say, “He’s so much fun to hang out with, but he’s a player, so just have fun with him, and enjoy the sex”, and girls will love spending time with me because I have ultra VIP access to clubs/restaurants/Life, live a jet-setting/elite celeb lifestyle, am recognized on the streets everywhere that I go, and make them feel better about themselves because they feel like Angie next to Brad, but in the end, they get tired of their toy and realize it is probably not going anywhere, and want one who will take them seriously. The greatest thing about being “The Toy” is that you can have sex with hot girls and there is no problem cutting the cord because they know Arthur Kade has to move on to greener pastures, but what if you find one that is special (Or has the potential with top notch training and schooling) and you don’t want to lose it (Or want to keep it on the “Kade Burner” for a while until you decide, is it impossible for them to ever see you as anything besides their sex object? “The Toy” is the guy her friends say to her, “I love him, but not for you” because “The Toy” is the closed off guy who won’t commit in their eyes, and will end up hurting their friend.

2) The Professional-This is the area that most of Center City Philadelphia falls into because this is a “Blue-Collar” town filled with lawyers, accountants, and doctors, and it’s like watching Ants marching when you’re above it all like Arthur Kade. These are the guys who drink beer instead of champagne, eat quesadillas instead of caviar, and drive Hyundai’s instead of Bentley’s, but they are dependable and secure, and girls “Can Build a Life” with them. They are the guy you can bring home to Mom, and he will share his GPA with you, his career track, and what firm or hospital he will be partner at, but if Mom asked, “How many times has my daughter achieved orgasm with you?”, he probably doesn’t even know the answer. “The Professional” is the “White Picket Fence Life” that the girl gets tired of, and then wakes up 10 years later and wonders why he isn’t partner yet, why they never have sex and when they do they have to fit it in between TV shows, and if he is screwing his secretary, and then calls Arthur Kade to remedy the problem.

3) The Homely Brain-This is the guy that the girl tells her girlfriends, “He’s not really my type (Meaning he’s extremely ugly or dorky), but he’s so smart and witty, and makes me laugh (Meaning he has a tiny penis, and couldn’t find his way to a vagina if you drew him a map)”, and usually is some type of scholar or teacher, or has a job he believes “Benefits society”, and will argue with everyone about politics, philosophy, and principle, but has never had enough “Street Cred” like a poor Russian Jew from the “Russian Projects” to know anything about life that he hasn’t read in a textbook. All the girls friends will hate him because he thinks he smarter and elite, and will usually dress like a Brooks Brothers commercial to look “Ordinary”, but in the end the girl still calls “The Toy” for help.

4) The Bad Boy-Although The Brand has been called “The Newest Bad Boy In Hollywood”, and “A New Version of James Dean for the Internet Age” by a media source, he is not the traditional “Bad Boy”. The “Bad Boy” is someone who can’t stay out of trouble, gets drunk and does stupid stuff or gets arrested all the time, doesn’t really care about sleeping with girls, cannot hold down a job, and has bad personal hygiene, but girls love him because he represents a way “To piss Daddy Off”. The Older the “Bad Boy” gets, the lamer he becomes, and while he dominated in high school, he is a loser in his 30’s, and will be the guy everyone sits around at a bar and asks, “Whatever happened to so and so?”

5) The Heir-This is you’re prototypical rich boy who Daddy put through college, never pursued a dream, and is happy to just never have to worry where his next paycheck is coming from, but is so spoiled that everyone else picks on him and makes sure his life is miserable, and he ends up buying a hot girl rather than landing her (Once again she calls “The Toy” for mid day appearances, and I will never forget when I used to hook up with a wife of “The Heir”, and while we were laying in bed at the Motel 6 in King Of Prussia she said to The Brand, “I can’t believe I meet you in a motel to have sex”, and Kade’s response was, “Would you rather be at a Four Seasons and not cumb?”, and she said, “I would rather drive my CL convertible”), but at the end of the day, money won’t bring you happiness, but good alimony will make “The Toy” have to work less

HUGE Announcement coming shortly for “The Journey”!!!!!!

“Kade’s Corner at 8AM is a “”Way Of Life”"”…Arthur Kade…01/04/09

Some recent Kade Nation Fan mail:

1)Guy, I gutta tell you, I’m liking your approach. Reading through your page makes laugh out loud. You come off so confident…(well as others put it,

“like a douche”), but you’re getting the publicity you say you would by doing this. Freaking classic! I like it, but from reading your page I am required to hate you. In reality, we would prob get along well. I get your plan and I hope it works out for you. PROPS! My friend! Props.

All the best,

-Sean

2)I heard you on the bert show. I understand what you are doing and it is probably working because I had to check out your site, but just chill a little because you do not want to be hated. Tone the arrogance down. You are getting the attention but you do not want to be too much over the top. Good Luck!

3)Arthur,

Huge shout out from a huge fan in Kade nation. I was wondering if you could tell us more about your workout/ gym routine and diet. I’m looking to dominate this year with a Kade style body and could learn from you.

Thanks-

Shawn

2009: The Year of Kade's Failures in Review (Youtube video exclusive)

Like the rest of the world, we don't really give much of a damn about Arthur Kadyshes (rhymes with "Crisco McLispo Fin Faced Failure"). However, 2009 was a pretty epic and humorous string of failures for our lying, lisping loon named Arthur Kadyshes. Here's a good way to start the new year, knowing full well that Kade is going to alienate even more people in 2010. Check out this video:

Please forgive us if we don't seem to care about this blog as much as we used to. It's really hard to put even 5 or 10 minutes into this thing when you stop and realize that Arthur is retarded and his enablers are just as classless and stupid as him. There is literally zero chance Arthur gets even one speaking part in any production ever, being that he's surrounded by an epic collection of losers and to get somewhere in media/entertainment, you need to have good people around you and have good connections to open doors. Kade has no connections and very low quality help--Last year he started off with Ron Hansen helping him get his site up and GN Kang acting as his videographer but those two have taken on lesser roles, only to be replaced by an inept and retarded midget named Chad Boonswang and a collection of poor, low class, aging failures at life named Sabrina "The Gunt" Strickland and Lindsay "Teefs" Furman (the girl with a reddish Lego Wig looking hairstyle). In other words, Kade brought "D" level game in 2009, so I see no reason for us to keep smashing him with our "A game".

The plan for this site is just to keep archiving the horrible and stupid things Kade says, so we'll have evidence of that when he goes ballistic and implodes. Arthur's most likely course of action, when his "acting career" fails, is to start working at the salon with step-mom Raya Yukhimov and Leonard Kadyshes (the dad who neglected him). It would be sad, except that Arthur Kade is a douchebag failure at life.

1/3/10

Leonard Kadyshes and Raya Yukhimov arrest records for criminal theft

Here's a present from a reliable tipster in Pennsylvania law enforcement. Apparently, Leonard Kadyshes (that's Arthur Kade's neglectful, misogynist father) and Raya Yukhimov (Kade's step mom, the one his dad left his mom for) were busted for a conspiracy to steal merchandise when Kade would've been about 10 years old. The charges were theft, conspiracy, and receipt of stolen goods. This arrest incident probably affected Kade a good deal growing up, knowing that people in the family and the neighborhood would've thought his father was a scumbag. Imagine being a boy and having that hanging over you--this wasn't even something manly, like a real heist, it was probably Leonard and Raya stuffing tacky items into their pockets. Who knows, maybe Arthur was present (probably not, since his dad neglected him)?

Without further adieu, here are some of the police reports http://ujsportal.pacourts.us/DocketSheets/CPArchiveReport.aspx?matterID=16984467

I'm sure there is a lot more dirt on this disgusting douchebag Leonard Kadyshes, but I'm not feeling like digging it up myself. Email us if you have something. legowigkade@gmail.com

Happy New Year, everyone! Hope your 2010 is better than Kade's 2009... it really can't be worse, now can it?

Arthur Kade Dresses Like an Idiot for New Years Eve and Calls It Couture

We all knew Arthur would usher in the New Year in Philly and that he would do so wearing some form of unattractive, inappropriate attire. Well, the jacket, shirt and pants weren't so bad. What we don't get is why in the holy hell he was wearing 3D glasses from Avatar (stolen, obviously) with the lenses popped out. He looked like some kind of deranged 1930's gangster merged with a Groucho Marx doll with that cheap wool fedora and those glasses. Even more astonishing is that he calls this "couture." For those of you that don't know, couture is defined as the following: "...the creation of exclusive custom-fitted clothing. Haute couture is made to order for a specific customer, and it is usually made from high-quality, expensive fabric and sewn with extreme attention to detail and finish, often using time-consuming, hand-executed techniques." As a commenter on his site pointed out, a Calvin Klein off-the-rack jacket, off-the-rack pants, a tuxedo shirt, and a costume shop fedora do not equal couture.
It's still amazing to us that Kade doesn't even try to appear intelligent. He really thinks that outfit is couture because he doesn't even know what the word means. He just likes to throw terms out there and see what sticks.
So it's 2010 and Kade promises this will be "the year of the brand." We at LegoWig fully expect this year to be nothing but more of the same: more failed auditions, no speaking lines, very little press, more drugs, more nights out at clubs, more calling himself an international celebrity without ever leaving the country, more lies that he has millions of fans, more alienation from his friends, and in general just more and more bullshit, because that's all Arthur Kadyshes can offer the world - BULLSHIT.
After an amazing New Years Eve in Philly (I decided to stay at home because a) it was probably Arthur Kade’s last New Years in Philly, and b) I am working on something right now that will be much more advantageous for “The Journey” that I will hopefully be announcing shortly) at a private party at the newest Not Yet Opened restaurant on the 37th floor of 2 Liberty called R2L, and then Recess, it is time to go back to work “Kade Style” and make this the year where The Brand becomes a Global Icon, and takes his next step to Lil’ Oscar. My computer has been malfunctioning since New Year’s so I am fully operational, and will resume regularly scheduled blogging tomorrow.

A note about these photos - Arthur's stupidity shines like a star considering he uploaded and posted several completely blurry photos. But then we realized, what a great thing he did for us! It's actually so much easier to look at these pictures when his hideous nose, rapey eyes, chapped lips, and neck acne are not plainly visible. So we ask this of you Arthur: please post all blurry photos from now on, OK?