A reminder.

Since Kade is still in L.A., here are some words from the wise...

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LWK, the REAL Kade News Network (just like FOX news: biased as hell).

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Arthur's Personality Disorder Discussed in New Blog Entry

I'm pressed for time, but I'll follow this up later with some thoughts.






For now, read the article and post thoughts/reflections below.


LWK

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U D S - Some Nonsense About Kade Evolving From An Ugly Childhood

We've not even read this yet, but saw the words "I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before" and completely spit out hot chocolate.

While having an amazingly fun din with my old roommate of 2 years, and one of his friends at The Piazza in No-Libs last night (This is hipster central, and after Arthur Kade’s “Kade Style” domination of their unofficial headquarters, “The Brandbary” (The Barbary) last month, I truly feel like their is a cross-culture respect between Kade Nation and the Hipsters to where they eye me now, and truly understand all that I am accomplishing with “The Biz” and “The Journey”), we were recanting all of the memories that we enjoyed while living together in my old house. We have always shared a symbiotic relationship, because we both have admittedly grew up as “The Ugly Duckling”, and then turned into drop dead gorgeous NYC models who could have any girls we desired, but at the same time we had to deal with the pain and torture of being the best looking, most charming, and most desired man in any room, and this will always bring out The Haters in full effect, and when I cam home, I was sent a picture of what The Brand looked like at 6 years old (Not to seem arrogant, but Arthur Kade was maybe the most handsome and lovable kid I have ever seen, and it is a shame that Papa and Mama Kade didn’t unite to make me a movie or TV Star then because I could have been the original Haley Joel Osment or Dakota Fanning) , and it really got me thinking about how a theory I call U.D.S., or the “Ugly Duckling Syndrome”, and how it affects stars and celebrities like Arthur Kade.

If you look at some of the most famous stars in the world like myself, many of them were very average looking or shy in high school, and then blossomed as time went on, and I can honestly admit that I was very average looking in high school because I was so poor that I wore the same clothes every day, never got haircuts, wore my grandmother’s socks, and bought clothes at discount shops (I was a future superstar living in the Gen Pop world and the Gen Pop let me know it by always making fun of me, snickering when I walked by, and talking about how I would be in the Food Stamp line with all the kids that were bused in), and then I was romantically linked in high school to the prettiest girl in my high school (She was so hot at that time that cars would stop in the middle of the street to check her out, and the Gen Poppers in my school would say, “I can’t believe Arthur landed her, he is the fucking man”, but the truth is that we were just friends), and that’s when it all changed and Arthur Kade went from loser to “King of Kadealot”. The amazing fact of the matter is that all the kids that were considered “Cool” in high school are either married and miserable, in jail, or complete Gen Pop losers.

I started working out, modeling, speaking with confidence that no one in the Gen Pop has ever seen before, and living with an unabated anger to be the best, and the rest is history, and now here is The Brand on the verge of becoming the “Biggest Star in Hollywood”, but the lesson that is to be taken away is that U.D.S. is truly a good thing if utilized correctly. For Arthur Kade, it was that constant pain that prepared me to never care what other people say (Hence, why I almost never read comments on my site, or care what “The Katers” think), and that drive to prove everyone wrong and do the impossible is what made me a “Living Legend” in my old company, and put me on the verge of super-stardom in “The Biz” today. The more the Gen Pop tells Arthur Kade he can’t the more he knows he can. Everybody loves the underdog, and Arthur Kade and “The Journey” are the true definition of people around the world cheering and following someone who would rather die than not achieve the impossible, and it is that passion and desire which has led many to compare me to the Muhammad Ali of my generation.

U.D.S. is also great when it comes to girls, because many girls who are not hot in high school or college would find ways to become more proficient at luring hot guys by developing better oral sex techniques, learning to be better in bed, and release their jealousy of the hot girls by giving gorgeous men like myself a treat to prove their worth. Once those ugly to average girls become hot, they have this insecurity so ingrained in them that now you get the total package of hot girl and great sex, so I have always joked with friends, “Ask her what she looked like in high school so you can see if she was the spoiled prom queen and will be a “”Dead Fish”", or if she grew into herself and will be the “”Hungry Lion”"”. That is the knowledge that makes Arthur Kade a god of opposite sex brilliance.

The next month or two has so many surprises in store for Kade Nation that I can hardly stop from getting an erection in Kade’s Corner, and my arrival to Sundance will be the stuff where legends are made.

“Growing up In poverty wasn’t a disadvantage, it was Arthur Kade’s winning lottery ticket to brilliance and orgasm”…Arthur Kade…01/06/09

Here is the level of transformation that occurred in The Brand from childhood to high school to Rising Celebrity in KA:

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The Toy, or, Arthur Kade Thinks He Is God's Gift To Women

Not much to say for an intro to Arthur's latest post. He thinks that doctors and lawyers and accountants drive Hyundais, eat quesadillas, and drink beer. Quick question: what the hell is wrong with quesadillas and beer??? On the flipside, who actually sits around and drinks champagne and eats caviar? Arthur Kade is so up-his-ass delusional with so many stereotypical situations that it never fails to amaze us. He's back at Cosi because he's too cheap to get Internet service in his apartment. This post is just beyond dumb... Kade can think he's a sex symbol all he wants, but a year of going home along to stroke it and blow his load on his nonexistent abs says otherwise!

It’s Monday Morning, its an amazingly early morning at Kade’s Corner at Cosi, and the official “The Year Of The Brand” has begun with Philadelphia’s most famous actor getting back to the grind, but as I work closer and closer to “Biggest Star In the World” status, and collector of the rare animal Arthur Kade calls “Lil’ Oscar”, I can’t help but recall the experiences that The Brand has had with girls the last couple months, and how they have shaped his psyche in understanding his own role to the opposite sex. Considering I have always been a successful business man, the hottest of hot girls have always wanted to get “Wifed” by me, but now that I am as one “Bizzer” called me, a “Cult Celebrity” (Him and I argued that I was mainstream because I am in the seven figs of Gen Poppers who follow “The Journey”) and rising International Sex Symbol, I have noticed a HUGE change in how girls look at me, and Arthur Kade is no longer “Hubbie Material”, but instead I have become “The Toy”. To understand the different classes girls look at guys at here are some popular definitions of different pinholes that we get put into:

1) The Toy-This is the guy who is usually gorgeous and “Mr. Popularity” like myself, that hot girls look at and say, “He’s so much fun to hang out with, but he’s a player, so just have fun with him, and enjoy the sex”, and girls will love spending time with me because I have ultra VIP access to clubs/restaurants/Life, live a jet-setting/elite celeb lifestyle, am recognized on the streets everywhere that I go, and make them feel better about themselves because they feel like Angie next to Brad, but in the end, they get tired of their toy and realize it is probably not going anywhere, and want one who will take them seriously. The greatest thing about being “The Toy” is that you can have sex with hot girls and there is no problem cutting the cord because they know Arthur Kade has to move on to greener pastures, but what if you find one that is special (Or has the potential with top notch training and schooling) and you don’t want to lose it (Or want to keep it on the “Kade Burner” for a while until you decide, is it impossible for them to ever see you as anything besides their sex object? “The Toy” is the guy her friends say to her, “I love him, but not for you” because “The Toy” is the closed off guy who won’t commit in their eyes, and will end up hurting their friend.

2) The Professional-This is the area that most of Center City Philadelphia falls into because this is a “Blue-Collar” town filled with lawyers, accountants, and doctors, and it’s like watching Ants marching when you’re above it all like Arthur Kade. These are the guys who drink beer instead of champagne, eat quesadillas instead of caviar, and drive Hyundai’s instead of Bentley’s, but they are dependable and secure, and girls “Can Build a Life” with them. They are the guy you can bring home to Mom, and he will share his GPA with you, his career track, and what firm or hospital he will be partner at, but if Mom asked, “How many times has my daughter achieved orgasm with you?”, he probably doesn’t even know the answer. “The Professional” is the “White Picket Fence Life” that the girl gets tired of, and then wakes up 10 years later and wonders why he isn’t partner yet, why they never have sex and when they do they have to fit it in between TV shows, and if he is screwing his secretary, and then calls Arthur Kade to remedy the problem.

3) The Homely Brain-This is the guy that the girl tells her girlfriends, “He’s not really my type (Meaning he’s extremely ugly or dorky), but he’s so smart and witty, and makes me laugh (Meaning he has a tiny penis, and couldn’t find his way to a vagina if you drew him a map)”, and usually is some type of scholar or teacher, or has a job he believes “Benefits society”, and will argue with everyone about politics, philosophy, and principle, but has never had enough “Street Cred” like a poor Russian Jew from the “Russian Projects” to know anything about life that he hasn’t read in a textbook. All the girls friends will hate him because he thinks he smarter and elite, and will usually dress like a Brooks Brothers commercial to look “Ordinary”, but in the end the girl still calls “The Toy” for help.

4) The Bad Boy-Although The Brand has been called “The Newest Bad Boy In Hollywood”, and “A New Version of James Dean for the Internet Age” by a media source, he is not the traditional “Bad Boy”. The “Bad Boy” is someone who can’t stay out of trouble, gets drunk and does stupid stuff or gets arrested all the time, doesn’t really care about sleeping with girls, cannot hold down a job, and has bad personal hygiene, but girls love him because he represents a way “To piss Daddy Off”. The Older the “Bad Boy” gets, the lamer he becomes, and while he dominated in high school, he is a loser in his 30’s, and will be the guy everyone sits around at a bar and asks, “Whatever happened to so and so?”

5) The Heir-This is you’re prototypical rich boy who Daddy put through college, never pursued a dream, and is happy to just never have to worry where his next paycheck is coming from, but is so spoiled that everyone else picks on him and makes sure his life is miserable, and he ends up buying a hot girl rather than landing her (Once again she calls “The Toy” for mid day appearances, and I will never forget when I used to hook up with a wife of “The Heir”, and while we were laying in bed at the Motel 6 in King Of Prussia she said to The Brand, “I can’t believe I meet you in a motel to have sex”, and Kade’s response was, “Would you rather be at a Four Seasons and not cumb?”, and she said, “I would rather drive my CL convertible”), but at the end of the day, money won’t bring you happiness, but good alimony will make “The Toy” have to work less

HUGE Announcement coming shortly for “The Journey”!!!!!!

“Kade’s Corner at 8AM is a “”Way Of Life”"”…Arthur Kade…01/04/09

Some recent Kade Nation Fan mail:

1)Guy, I gutta tell you, I’m liking your approach. Reading through your page makes laugh out loud. You come off so confident…(well as others put it,

“like a douche”), but you’re getting the publicity you say you would by doing this. Freaking classic! I like it, but from reading your page I am required to hate you. In reality, we would prob get along well. I get your plan and I hope it works out for you. PROPS! My friend! Props.

All the best,

-Sean

2)I heard you on the bert show. I understand what you are doing and it is probably working because I had to check out your site, but just chill a little because you do not want to be hated. Tone the arrogance down. You are getting the attention but you do not want to be too much over the top. Good Luck!

3)Arthur,

Huge shout out from a huge fan in Kade nation. I was wondering if you could tell us more about your workout/ gym routine and diet. I’m looking to dominate this year with a Kade style body and could learn from you.

Thanks-

Shawn

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Appearance Requests

I have to believe that Cock Gobbler is sitting in front of a fireplace somewhere waiting for Santa because with his level of delusion NOTHING is too far out there for him to believe. It's really amazing that not one friend or family member hasn't had him involuntarily committed to a mental institution. The things he thinks he will be able to command in 2010 is so far out there that I don't even know where to begin. I've worked with big name stars with YEARS of proven box office draw that don't have contract riders close to what this dip shit thinks he'll be able to get WITHOUT EVER HAVING BEEN IN ANYTHING where he's more than an EXTRA. I'm no head shrinker, but I have to believe he has broken from reality so badly that there is no return to normalcy. We all knew that because he'll never get hired once HR does a Google search, but now I am convinced the only way he'll be able to end this is in a huge fucking explosion. I hope he only hurts himself when he finally does lose it, but I'm not confident it won't end in murder(s)/suicide. People of Philly, watch your backs. Now, some of the most deluded ramblings Arthur Kadyshes has ever posted...

Being a celebrity and rising name in “The Biz” after only 9.2334 months into “The Journey” (I start my fight Training for My “Warrior Role” in a the feature film I am filming in January, and have a HUGE audition for a principal role in a feature film both on Sunday), Arthur Kade is now a brand name that is being asked to appear at various events, spectacles, and parties, and with “The Year Of The Brand” quickly approaching (I was telling one of the girls at the TITS “Wifey” search (The event was great with an ultra “Kade Style” high energy DJ playing music the whole day, the staff was bringing girls over to meet me and try out to become the next “Wifey”, and it honestly felt like an awesome night club during the day, and I can’t wait to see how the pics come out of the girls we end up selecting for TITS) that I guest appeared and started judging today, and which I will be hanging out with Porn Star Courtney Cumzz at tomorrow (I will make sure to take a bunch of pics and vids because she is one of the biggest Porn Stars in the world, and it will be an edgy change from the Hollywood “A-Listers” I usually chill with), that “In 2010, Arthur Kade will be the biggest name in Hollywood, and possibly the biggest name in the world”, and all she could do was smile and be going nuts inside that on a day when she thought she was just entering a normal store, she met an enormous budding KA star), as I was driving home to the 215 from NYC, I was thinking about how celebs like Rihanna, J-LO (Who I just partied at the invitation only VOGUE/Versace party in Kadeami with), and Angie Jolie request certain things when they appear at events, and what will be my requests next year when I am being paid to appear at parties, clubs, movie premieres, charity/social events, and children’s birthdays, and here is what I came up with:

1) 1400 Thread Count Sheets/Silk Pajamas-Having grown up on welfare fighting for blankets to stay warm at night, Arthur Kade has always put a heavy premium on what type of sheets caress his skin at night, and while I don’t always care if I stay in a suite, I do care that I have the finest sheets in the hotel that I am being placed in because I want to be able to relax before delighting the crowd with my presence, and also I love to keep the room extra cold and hide under the sheets because it gives me a sense of feeling like a child all over again. This is also crucial because when The Brand takes a girl or Fan back to the hotel, it is vital that she enjoys her Kadeing by relaxing after in warmth, and this will also make her feel even more euphoria about being with a celeb of Kade’s caliber.

2) White Roses-These are my favorite smelling roses, and I love walking into a room that smells good and fresh because it shows me that the entity paying me to appear cares about The Brand, and is willing to go the extra mile to make me feel at home and comfortable. They can either be in a vase, bowl, or just on the ground (This would be extra erotic when I bring a fellow celeb back or Fan(s) that want a threesome where you just walk around barefoot during and after sex, and just walk on white roses like in a dream), but I want the smell to be overwhelming, and the beauty of the scene would be total “Kade Style” dream like. This will also be a sign that Arthur Kade has risen from poverty to star, and will help me stay grounded as I know that millions are watching me ascend the ladder to Little Oscar on my mantle.

3) Fine Imported Water-Arthur Kade drinks anywhere from 20-25 glasses of water a day, and once I am at the top of “The Biz”, Perrier/Pellegrino is just not good enough for purity, so I will request that my water be flown in privately (This is something Jen Aniston is famous for, so I may have a Rep from Team Kade contact her people in KA, and see what she prefers and maybe even split the cost with her if she wants) from Europe so that I can stay hydrated to combat my Type 2 Diabetes.

4) Private Butler and Chef- When “The Journey” reaches full global epidemic stages next year with my hit TV Show with IMG Media, and my NY Times Bestseller with Trident Media Group, I will prefer that only a select few are allowed to prepare my food or touch my belongings, so Team Kade will do background checks and credit checks to decide who will be allowed to privately cook for me, and clean my rooms and houses. The Brand is one of the most controversial figures in the world already (A Fan compared me to John Lennon this week because of the polarizing nature of “The Modern Actor” that I have created and am ushering in), so like a country’s president, or political figure, I have to know that what I put in my body, and who is around me is safe.

5) BodyGuards-Like the above item, I need to have a team of people watching me and protecting me from rabid fans, stalkers (Already have some now who twitter, call, and email, and it’s only going to get worse in 2010), and especially paparazzi who try to see the latest KA 9 or 10 I close, or what store or restaurant I am in, and although I am a “Celeb Of The People” (I love to give autographs, vids, and pics to Gen Poppers and Kade Nation), safety comes first for The Brand, and if someone’s husband thinks I slept with his overzealous wife, I need people who can protect a multi-million dollar investment like Arthur Kade. My bodyguards will be required to have hand to hand combat training, rifle, gun, and explosive expertise, and have a former background as a professional like Secret Service, FBI, or CIA

“The Brand is Guts, Hustle, and Gangsta’ all wrapped inside of Beauty”…Arthur Kade…12/11/09

and for the first time, I write in quote from a Kade Nation Member:

Hey Arthur. I thought of a great quote you could use for your next post.. Keep killing it, Kade style!!

” Christians worship Jesus, Gen Poppers worship Arthur Kade—-But since gen poppers outnumber Christians 3 to 1, looks like we have a clear winner for the title of “New Messiah”

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Arrival in Miami Not Kadeami

So Arthur arrive in Miami yesterday... he can't believe the pilot didn't recognize him... he thought the pilot said "have a nice day" because it was him, not because pilots say that to everyone as they leave the plane... he took a video at baggage claim, wearing a self-painted t-shirt that says "Kade Style" on the front and "Kade Out" on the back... he checked into the W hotel as if he were checking into a million dollar a night palace, as if what he's doing is inaccessible to the "gen pop" he so despises... he posted an absurd amount of childish and immature twitter posts about where he was... he thinks he's a "jet setter" when he's only flying for the second time all year... and he thinks he's an international jet setter when he has not even been out of the country this year at all... he thinks he thinks that flying and checking into a hotel and having lunch is "more than most gen-poppers do in a week."

Miami, we feel so sorry for you. We're sorry that this talentless creep from Philadelphia is visiting your town and thinks he owns the place. We're sorry you have to be infected with the disgusting head-to-toe nightmare that is Arthur Kade. We're sorry that this guy is walking about taking photos and videos constantly, and posting to Twitter from his phone. We're sorry that a person who has accomplished nothing thinks he is going to "dominate" your city as if he is a multi-million dollar earning celebrity. We sympathize with you, truly.

All lies and unprovable nonsense are highlighted below:

It’s official that The Brand has arrived in Kadeami, and the amazing Gen Pop domination that Arthur Kade is famous for is about to begin at levels this city hasn’t seen in years. I have gotten emails from Kade Nation Fnas from around the globe begging me to update as much as possible to see if I meet a “Drought” Breaker, How the audition and Potential Gig go on Saturday and Sunday, and most importantly to view how a celebrity and International “Jet Setter” in his prime, parties in one of the hottest cities in the world. There are many private parties that we have already been invited to, and plenty of vagina to spread around, and knowing that I have a killer audition for “The Journey” this weekend is just a cherry on top because all I have been hearing about is how December is a “Dead Month” for auditions and work, and how every casting director and “Bizzer” is checked out until January, but the fact that I have booked multiple auditions and a potential “Warrior Role” on a film are a testament to my fortitude to The Craft, especially while authoring a hit book and developing a hit TV Show. I have already met some fellow models that will potentially be joining Philadelphia’s favorite son tonight (The best moment of the day so far was a random Kade Nation Fan stopping me outside the W on Collins, and saying, “You’re that Guy from Philadelphia!!”, and I smiled and said “I’ll write about you on ArthurKade.com tonight, what’s your name or let’s do a video?”, and he replied, “I can’t do a video, but thanks man”, and rolled off into the street).

Here are the details from my arrival so far, Pictures and vids from the hottest hotel in Miami, The Newly Opened W Hotel (This place is so “Kade Style”), and the 5 star Setai Hotel where we just grabbed a quick dinner before hitting the invitation only parties that only Arthur Kade gains access to (The crazy thing is I have only been here 3 hours and The Brand already has done more than most Gen Poppers do here in a week) and I’m interested to see what celeb friends I run into and exchange “Biz” talk with about my progress and updates on “The Journey”. I may take it a bit easier tonight just because Friday and Saturday are going to be insane with dinners, events, and clubs, but anytime I say that, I wake up with an NYC 9 or 10 next to me, wondering how she got there and how I will get her to leave.

“”Jet Setting” isn’t about where you travel, but what stewardesses you get to play with in your personal private Jet”…Arthur Kade…12/03/09

Finally, we grabbed this image from the YouTube video above. Yes folks, it appears that he used stencils and spray paint to make a shirt that says "Kade Style." There really are no words that define how totally stupid this is.

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Tiger's Women, Wherein Arthur Thinks He's Equal to Tiger Woods

People, your mind is bound to explode after reading even 1/10th of the post below. How can anyone - even a person as stupid and deluded as Arthur Kade - honestly think they are comparable to Tiger Woods? Does Kade giggle when he writes crap like this knowing he's just trying to get a reaction? Does he really believe it? How in the world does someone who is hated by everyone, who has not acted in anything, who has not writen anything other than his abysmal blog think he's at all relatable to Tiger Woods?

Lies and nonsense Kade can and will never prove are highlighted below:

Being a celeb like Tiger Woods, and having girls throwing themselves at The Brand everywhere he goes because of the popularity of “The Journey”, I completely understand why Tiger did what he did, and the type of temptation that comes with being in “The Public Eye” and not just a regular Gen Popper. I have girls who want monogamy all the time, but it’s so hard to commit when you’re a future Acting and NY Times Bestselling star because you will feel guilty if you cheat, but also it can hurt your marketability and endorsements. I Think it is important to take Tiger’s situation and breakdown the ratings I have for each girl involved, talk about his apology statement, and have a heart to heart to with every celeb figure like The Brand, as to some tips as to what to do to avoid getting caught when you’re cheating (People ask me all the time “Kade, have you cheated?”, and the answer is always, “Maybe?”). People like Tiger and Arthur Kade always have tabloids following us (I have attached a new Gawker ((Or should I just call it “Gawkade” because of all the coverage they give me on a 24/7 basis)) article that labels me under the term, “Heroes” and talks about the character research I will be doing for my potential “Warrior Role” in a feature film with one of my great Body Pics of the year from Arthur Kade), and it is nearly impossible not to get caught in this media age for M.I.M.’s (Moguls in the Making), so this is why I sometimes question whether The Brand can ever settle down at all? Here is the Gawkade article and my Tiger thoughts:

http://gawker.com/5416504/arthur-kade-touches-little-oscar

1) The Wifey (KA 8.8)- Elin is a very attractive and sexy girl, but from moment one, I have always viewed her as “Mother Hot” rather than “Stripper Hot” (The Angelina Jolie Syndrome that gets worse with each kid, hence why my future mate and Arthur Kade may just adopt African children and teach them about Judiasm), and she has great legs, nice firm tits, and a pretty Scandinavian Face, but I can see where he would stray because she just doesn’t have that “I want to take you in the bathroom and ravage you look”, but yet I could see her being great at a black tie event talking to all the other mothers about the dining set she just bought. At Times shes looks a bit manly, and her legs aren’t long enough for a high level model, and in this picture I feel like her nose is a bit thick for her face which would prompt me to pay for her to thin it a bit, and it gives her kind of a Gina-Lee Nolan Look which went out with Pam Anderson in the 90’s.

2) Rachel Uchitel (NYC 9.3)-Arthur Kade has met Rachel in person in NYC, and I can honestly say that she is one of the hottest and sexiest “Non-Celeb” girls that I have ever encountered in that city, and the way she carries herself is beyond sexual, but yet she has a “St. Tropezish” quality about her that makes her stick out in a crowd with beautiful hair, amazing lips and legs, great olive skin, and the “I Run This Town Swagga” that only entities like The Brand can display, and she would be a 9.8-10 if she were younger (It is so hard to give any girl over 30 higher than a 9.5) and a celeb (Although someone said today, “She is a celeb now”), so maybe that will elevate her rating. When I met her at Griffin, there were a bunch of models and supermodels in the room and at our table, and I remember saying to my friend who I had a table with, “She dominates all of those girls”. She denies the affair though, but I can understand why Tiger would.

3) “Hooters Special” (KA 6.8)- Jaimee is not attractive at all, and I just don’t get what my man Tiger was thinking, especially because he has a “Frisbee Face” (A Face that is round like a Wham-O Frisbee), smaller “Pancake Tits”, and looks like a typical trashy girl that you could find at a Hooters in Jacksonville, FL who is married by 22, has three kids, and smoke cigarettes whil serving you food. She has a nice lower body, and there is a certain trailer park Trashiness sex appeal about her where I could see having sex with her in every position possible, but I could also see her being a “Pin Hole In the Condom Girl”, that would lure Tiger into making some more “EuroAsian” babies. She reminds me of a girl that I met in “PB” (Pacific Beach), San Diego who I met at MoonDoggy’s and ended up rescheduling my flight home to Philly on a Sunday for great sex at her apartment, but never called again because I could never bring her home to Mama Kade.

The Apology:

Listening to Tiger’s concise apology was perfect, because the trick to not getting into more trouble when you have already been caught for cheating is just say “I am Sorry” or “My Bad” and this will help keep the lid on the other girls that will start coming out of the walls claiming you had sex with them or impregnated them. I am a huge fan of the “Deny, Deny, Deny” approach to cheating, but this is where celebrity can get us all, because you have unlimited resources in the mags that cover us like US Weekly and People who will go to all ends to get interviews and investigate everything going on, and then when it comes out Arthur Kade can look like one of His “Man Crushes”, Bill Clinton after Monica sucker punched him. Never release more info than needed, and hope it goes away, but something tells me Tiger has a “Kade Style” headache ahead.

Some tips to avoid getting caught cheating when you’re a celeb like Arthur Kade:

1) Use a “Kade Phone” (Like a “Bat Phone” but better as a “Kadeism”) where you have a separate phone that can never be linked back to you, and one that you’re wife or piece will never find. make sure it rings anonymous when you call as well.

2) NEVER Leave Voicemails, BBM’s or Texts-This is ultimately what sunk Tiger with the Hooters Girl, because now she has concrete proof that they have a relationship. Arthur Kade only leaves voicemails when it’s friends, and they have to be general in nature like, “Hey, it’s The Brand, give me a call back”, and keep his BBM’s and Texts to a minimum (Not that I really have anything to hide because I’m not married, and it’s my job to take down 9’s and 10’s and do or say whatever it take to make it happen for Kade Nation)

3) Pack your own Condoms-This prevents the piece on the side from “Pinning” it or giving you an old one that is apt to break, and a when a girl is fame hungry, they will do just about anything in their delusional world to lock down stars like Kade and Woods.

4) Communication goes through your “Reps” or “Team”-Never talk directly to the girl by any media source that can be tracked, but instead have your agent, publicist, or manager make all the arrangements for any “Get Togethers”.

5) Fuck, but don’t be seen- Always have little get-aways that you can meet the girl where no Gen Poppers can ever see you or report on you (Dubai during a HUGE Golf tournament is a perfect example of where not to meet), and this way you can send the message to “The Piece” that, “This is just sex, hence why the Wifey gets the Mansion, and you get the Motel”.

6) NEVER say-”I love you”, “I’ll leave my wife”, “This is the best sex ever”, or my all time favorite, “I made a mistake marrying her”.

7) Never complain about money or Pressure in front of her-It’s hard to believe Tiger actually complained about not being “Financially Stable” (Hasn’t He Made a Billion Dollars already?) or “The Pressure Gets to me” because for warriors like him and us, we can never let anyone know this. We live for the pressure, and it is in that pressure where we excel the most, but I think this is Tiger’s way of letting Gen Pop Girls look at him like more of a human, and thus give him better sex.

 8) The Aftermath-If and when you’re caught, and out of options, pull a “Kobe”, and cry in public, say you love your family, and of course buy your wife a $4 Million Dollar ring to make her support you in public. The whole “Wife stands By Me” move goes so far in the public’s eyes, and make you look more Gen Poppish, rather than an arrogant celeb.

“Being a celebrity means not ever being able to hide when you’ve fucked up, so make a bunch of money so that you can buy your way out”…Arthur Kade…12/02/09

read more “Tiger's Women, Wherein Arthur Thinks He's Equal to Tiger Woods”

Girls, If You Like Sex With Psychotic Immature Freaks, Arthur Kade is Looking For You

The latest post from Arthur Kade, "The Drought Breaker," is below. It's probably one of the most disgusting of any of his posts. It's almost impossible to believe that someone who writes like this - and on this topic - also thinks he's going to win a Pulitzer Prize for writing. Newsflash Arthur - there is no prize for best impersonation of a deranged 10 year old who has never been laid. 
The last video is just as disturbing. It's really funny listening to Arthur ramble on about why he doesn't date, because he had his heart broken, blah blah blah. Grow a pair already Arthur, you're a 32 year old man for crying out loud!

While at dinner after an amazing work out tonight with one of The Entourage, we started discussing how The Drought is now reaching epic proportions (10 months on Dec. 12th, and I wonder if this technically qualifies me as a virgin again although with the countless girls I have had in my life time if a Gen Popper still averages it out I am still ahead of anyone I know but one person), and I started talking about when I do finally decide to experience the “Kingdom of Warmth” again, what will the actual experience be like. At first, I started talking about whether Arthur Kade will go the first few times like a “Minute Man” just to get the rust off, and then get back to old form (I don’t think this will happen because even during this time I have ejaculated in or on tons of girls in other areas, and I have still held on really well), or will I just go 12 time the first night and keep exploding like the Hoover Dam with cracks in it. The conversation quickly turned to the opposite gender, and we discussed instead what type of girl will I get, and the various styles that girls are in bed, and I decided to break them down. Every girl has a different “Game” in bed, and some are better than others and we wondered which one I would get to break “The Drought”.

1) The Assassin-This is the girl that is all about The penis and “Penal Insertion”, and wants to just do whatever it takes to get it inside of her as quickly as possible. There is little foreplay involved, and usually the girl will warm up by giving oral sex to get you fully erect, and then jump you to finish you off. These girls are great when you just want a “Quickie”, but if it’s consistent than it gets boring and repetitive.

2) The SHE-RA-This is the girl that is ultra aggressive in bed, and looks at you like the girl, and will “Fuck You” rather than the other way around. I am not a huge fan of girls like this because they will work so hard that sometimes it feels like your penis may break in half, and it becomes impossible to ejaculate because you are thinking, “Am I going to have to go the hospital after this”. I once had a girl who rode me so hard that it hurt to pee for 2 days after.

3) The Starlet- This girl is very artistic in nature, and is probably in some type of craft that involves beauty or physical movements and heavy physical judgement, and at nature is very insecure with her body, and will be very shy in bed. This girl may not want to remove certain clothes during sex, stay under the covers so you can’t view her body, and once you are done, she will cover up and literally run into the bathroom to clean up. Since The Brand has slept with models, actresses, and artists of all kinds, this girl will feel judged and will not bring that same “Artistic Talent” to sex, and Arthur Kade will usually be “One and Done”.

4) The Rammer-This girl will want you to ram her as hard and as long as possible and Usually it will be either Doggystyle or Missionary since this is the easiest way to gather full pushing force and maximum motion of inertia. They are usually the hardest ones to make ejaculate because it takes so long and so effort to make it happen, and by the time it does you are a ball of sweat and half-erect because it feels more like camp labor then sex. This can be great when you’re have crazy drunk sex when it’s harder to cum anyway, but otherwise can get a bit annoying.

5) The Schwartzkopf-This girl is military in style where she will bark out orders through out sex like “More to the right”, “Now my clit”, “Turn Me around”, and my all time favorite, “Go faster and and then slower”, and it ca easily de-masculate men to the point where they feel like they are taking orders like a Marine. These girls are usually devoid of Passion and Heart, and look at sex like a battle that troops are fighting rather than a sensual experience of two organisms sharing a bond of fluids and emotion.

6) The Cirque De Soleil-This is the girl who feels like everytime she is having sex with Arthur Kade, she has to put on the performance of a lifetime, and will act like a caged animal instead of herself. I compare to actors with less skill level trying to overact, and it can end up feeling fake, and like you should have payed $11 at the door, but sometimes if you can settle the girl down and harness the positive energy and relax the show, it can make it amazing sex after all. These are also the girls who will be most apt to video tape because they want to feel like they are filming a porno with you, and I had one years ago who when I watched our tape years ago, I said, “Wow, we should get paid money for this”.

7) The Einstein-This is the girl that is just amazing in bed, and can adjust herself to accommodate any style that matches up with what the man wants, and knows her body inside and out, and will usually play with herself during sex, or do whatever it takes to get you and her off. She can be wild at times, and sensual at others, and understands what it takes to make the both of you happy. The Brand has found strippers to be the best at this because they will transfer their entertainment and physiological abilities to the bedroom and create ecstasy, and also they love threesomes with other strippers (I dated a stripper years ago who would bring home other co-workers, some who were married, and they would trade me and their husbands like Topps Basball Cards.

8 )The Dead-Fish-Just cut bait, and throw it back in the water

Here is a video of a random fan of “The Journey” from Kadelanta who yelled “Kade!?!?” on the street when he walked by me several times but I had my I-pod on, and when he stopped me, he said, “This is crazy. I read your blog. I am a HUGE fan”, so I did a Kade Nation Video with him (He told me he was in from out of town on business, but his face was so cute and priceless because he looked like a little kid who got the bike he wanted for Christmas), and also a video of me doing street Karaoke on Market Street showing off my vocal Improv Talents, and an acting vid with Sharon. I also received an interview request from a Japanese magazine showing my The Brand’s continuing Global expansion to The Far East.

“The Hardest Things in Life are Doing The Hardest Things”…Arthur Kade…12/1/09

read more “Girls, If You Like Sex With Psychotic Immature Freaks, Arthur Kade is Looking For You”

EU Syndrome

He gets worse with each post. He is a piece of shit, low class Philly asshole. If I had a child that grew up to be 1/10th of what Arthur Kadyshes is I would become a politician so I could change the abortion laws to make it legal to abort up until and including the 103rd trimester. More lies and delusion from the Cock Gobbler himself, Arthur Kadyshes... 

Gen Poppers come up to me and tell me all the time how amazing and glorious it is to see “The Journey” succeeding, and how amazing it must be to live this “Celebrity Life” of Arthur Kade (Just seeing Molly Weiner’s ((Whose whole fam is all rooted in “The Biz”)) reaction to seeing the “Kade Show Live” made me realize I am a once in a lifetime attraction), and for the most part, it really is awesome to know that I am on my way to becoming an award winning actor and author while developing a hit TV Show with IMG Media, and a New York Times Bestseller with Trident Media Group, but there are sometimes The Brand looks in his mirror at Chateau Kade, and thinks about how much he has changed emotionally throughout “The Journey”, as I complete my transformation from ultra-successful socialite/entrepreneur to “Global Marketing Icon”. Arthur Kade now looks in the mirror, and sees a person who is so passionate about his professional and social life in becoming a M.I.M. (Mogul In The Making) and yet so “EU” (Emotionally Unavailable) in his private life towards girls he sleeps with, his family and friends, and even his fans (I am becoming a global sex symbol where I have girls pretty much throwing themselves at me at all times, and yet 99% of the time, I see nothing there but a Vagina and a quick conquest while they all want me to “Wife” them), and wonder if this inability to commit to anything other than my thrust to Oscar winning Actor hurts me as as a Gen Pop Role Model and also as an actor.

Friday night was interesting, because I had a friend out again from KA (I am not sure that he has ever seen the type of Gen Pop Domination that I demonstrated Weds. and Friday nights where he actually told me at Recess, “Your stamina is remarkable) who saw me A) Make out with two girls simultaneously at Recess for at least 10 seconds not once but twice (This was so sexual that I think I had a massive erection the whole time thinking what a threesome with them would be like and having 2 different tongues thrust into my mouth like little hammerhead sharks), B) Stop a girl who works at a restaurant who I was sure hated me with her friend, and after several minutes of Kadeish charm, her and her friend were doing shots with me and playing the “Ice Cube Game” (This game is where you put an ice cube in your mouth and transfer it from mouth to mouth in a kissing motion and I actually had 4 girls playing with me in the middle of The Mogul Room at G and people’s faces around us said, “Only Arthur Kade could have 4 girls locking lips with him to get ice” and it’s funny because anytime I play that game an extra tongue touch happens so I wonder if that counts as “Hooking Up”), C) Dancing on all the raised speakers at Recess with girls and the Drummer to where one of the guys at DelFriscos said, “When we walked in, You were a dancing machine”, D)Having one of the prominent club owners of Philly say, “You are really the King Of Philly Now”, E)Having a Philly 5.86 who my friend called “Mr. T” tell me style was impeccable but that was so annoying that I literally turned my back when she tried to convince me Playboy was “Up Her Ass” and F) A girl who came up to me and said, “You have some HUGE Website, can I take a pic?”, and after we took it, she said “What’s the site by the way?” and I asked the bouncer to get her out of my sight immediately (If you don’t know who Arthur Kade is, then do not approach him). I am a social and acting god in “The Biz”, and had my friend in KA call my blog “Brilliant”, and “Fresh” and tell a friend in “The Entourage” at G, “His content is so obsessive and funny” (It’s weird to hear my writing and life referred to as “Content”, but that’s how we “Bizzers” refer to a living organic element like my blog), but like any genius, sometimes I question certain aspects of my life, and whether my pioneering Brilliance is a gift or a curse?

The question for Arthur Kade is have I become like Jason Bourne in “The Bourne Ultimatum” where I have become such a tremendous acting and writing “killing machine”, that I am sometimes losing the essence of who Arthur Kade really is? The Brand has always rated girls, used and had the hottest ones, and been the best at what he did professionally (I was called a “Living Legend” at my Old Company by a former Senior Vice President), but has “The Biz” and this sex symbol status jaded me to a point where normality no longer exists, and I have to be a “Frank Sinatra” like influence all the time on the Gen Pop, and will it ever allow me to be more than just a media giant/corporation? Am I losing the “human side” of Arthur Kade, and truly becoming a well-oiled killing machine who only hooks up with 9’s and 10’s and desires Little Oscar in his bed, and has to deal with Press/Media and Paparazzi, but nothing else? Will I get to a point where even Caviar is not good enough anymore, and the threesomes aren’t enough, and the money isn’t enough, and will this insatiable hunger for vagina, awards, and recognition actually not allow me to be happy and just become a media and sexual robot who dies aloof like Marlon Brando?

I have always wondered why so many celebs are so unhappy ,and considering I am one of them now after only 8.8991 months, I can tell Kade Nation that it really is everything it’s cracked up to be, but in the end, it’s not about the money and Fame, but still about the Emmy, Oscar, and Pulitzer, and I think that’s what has kept Arthur Kade so grounded. I can live a “Third World Lifestyle” (No Furniture, Blogging in a Beach Chair, Going to Kade’s Corner at Cosi everyday I’m not making a TV Show, Writing a Book, or being featured in a Movie) while dominating KA and NYC, but considering I just booked a feature film audition (I will blog this next) because I will be training on warrior fighting techniques to prepare for it, I am more excited about that than anything else.

“The Craft is what brought Arthur Kade to fame and sex symbol status, and it is what will keep his Legend alive. Welcome to Kadealot”…Arthur Kade…11/29/09

I also want to give a “Kade Style” Shout out to Fellow Celeb Fan, Zach Galifianakis, (The Hangover, HBO’s Bored To Death), who I heard mentioned he was a fan of The Brand and “The Journey” on the Comedy Death Ray podcast on I-Tunes. 

read more “EU Syndrome”