10/26/09

Kade Goes Solo (The Hermit Kade)

One can only hope that Arthur's moving out of Ron Hansen's condo means it's yet another place he's been kicked out of! And will someone please tell Arthur that it's ridiculous to use the words "best selling author, soon to be bestselling book, bring me into the eyes of other NY Times Bestsellers like Clancy, Brown, and Steele as a leader of industry and someone they can look to as a protege and fellow genius, and groundbreaking piece of American literature?" HE HAS NOT WRITTEN A SINGLE THING YET!

More completely absurd ramblings from our favorite 31 year old 10 year old...



After an amazing 7.889 months, and bouncing around various apartments and residences where I have allowed myself to experience the trials, tribulations, and plight of my fellow “Working Actor” (I wanted to live a “Third World Lifestyle” in stages, and it has allowed me to stay grounded through these beginning stages of “The Journey”), The Brand is ready to move into his own apartment, and allow myself to now experience the full maturation of my creative genius, both with The Craft, as well as a best selling author. I have been searching for the last 2 weeks for a place that would give me the “Kade Style” existence that I am used to, as well as give me the privacy that a “High profile” individual needs to explore his inner soul in order to finish the creation of my TV Show with IMG Media, continue the writing of my soon to be bestselling book represented by Trident Media Group, as well as continue building my growing resume of acting, and I have found the perfect place. I will be doing a video of my new apartment this week to introduce Kade Nation to the new and improved Chateau Kade.I’ll miss the current crib and people, but this is another growing step for me as an artist.
Great artists need privacy to tap into their “Creative Well” (Many of the greatest minds like Socrates, Plato, and Nietzsche lived a hermit like existence), and now that I have no personal privacy with the website, tabloid, and journalistic coverage that I get on a daily basis (I can’t walk through Penn Station without someone commenting on my walk on Gawker), I need to have a place where I can escape the pressures of my success and just be Arthur Kade, the actor, the author, The Brand. Superman would escape to the Fortress of Solitude when he needed a break from saving the Gen Pop, and I haven’t had an emotional break in what seems like ages, and I need the space to spit everything inside of me out for the world to taste and enjoy.
It was extremely important for me to find this level of solitude right now because I am reaching an apex of where I need my talents to be on full display, and with all of the girls that I have either been bringing home or having sleepovers with, I need privacy knowing that we are alone and can enjoy amazing sex and potential threesomes where no one is coming in and interrupting or even creating an Erin Andrews situation that could hurt my brand (I am always nervous that their are people looking through my windows or sneaking in my current place trying to get behind the scenes footage of my crazy life). It is also vital that I keep it a short term residence (I will have the flexibility to leave faster than my current place which will keep me right on schedule with my move to KA in 2010 as well as allow me the financial flexibility to look for a part time place in KA earlier so I can travel back and forth with the creation of my hit TV Show, and the finishing up of my book (All I can say is that this book is “The Talk of the Town” and is going to be so cool, so unique, and so “Arthur Kade” that I think it will bring me into the eyes of other NY Times Bestsellers like Clancy, Brown, and Steele as a leader of industry and someone they can look to as a protege and fellow genius).
I wonder if when James Frey (NY Times Best Selling Author of “A Million Little Pieces”) and Anna David (Author of “Party Girl” and “Bought”), who are Both Mega Fans of Arthur Kade and “The Journey”, came down to Philadelphia to meet and experience me a few months ago for dinner, did they imagine that I would be joining their ranks as an acclaimed author so quickly, and what is their reaction now to everything I have accomplished so far? Are they proud of me for changing the game at such a rapid rate, are they surprised that everything I have prognosticated happening in “The Biz” has happened, and am I the talk of the literary community right now to the point that everyone is wondering what this book will contain, and whether it will become “A groundbreaking piece of American Literature along the lines of Hamlet, The Da Vinci Code, and The NoteBook?”.
“I Love when writers from Rolling Stone meet me out, and they know who Arthur Kade is, and I tell them “”You Guys should do a story on me”"”…Arthur Kade…10/25/09















74 comments:

  1. Someone used this on a different site to call someone out, but I think it is perfect for the first post here.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEkWH8DB7b0

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  2. Okay, no sarcasm or hate here, just an honest question..... is he getting UGLIER in his Photo's as time goes on?

    His looks are devolving! For a self-proclaimed top-tier Model, the camera is his enemy!

    Age is not your friend Kade (is anything?)

    I'm looking forward to the photos of food from here out. I feel dirty just looking at him! He has that "Pedophile Vibe".

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  3. listen up ! This retard has to be stopped! The pics with public are a disgrace! They are all douches themselves but they keep encouraging this behavior.




    Crappy

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  4. Arthur, in order for your career to be over if seen driving the "hooptie," you'd have to have one first. You don't.

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  5. Arthur, your knowledge of American Literature is impressive. From Hamlet to The Da Vinci Code, you've read all the classics. I'm sure your upcoming book will be just as powerful as the great American novels "Oliver Twist", "War and Peace", and "L'√Čtranger". All great classics of American literature, but yours will be all the more powerful because you understand what the Gen Pop wants: The Kraft, The Banned, the unflushable Arturd Kade.

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  6. All this attention he gets is because of shameless self promotion. I don't know if I speak for anyone else, but if he dropped off the face of the earth, I'd wonder for maybe 30 seconds max where he went.

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  7. Yes he IS getting uglier. How old are those 'modeling' pics on his main page? He looks like hes 20+ years younger in them!

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  8. So here I am, sitting in my sad Gen Pop Life wondering what "amazing" parties Kade has been invited to host for NEW YEARS EVE?

    He bragged, 2.8576987 months ago that Australia was calling.

    So where will America's most "beloved A-list, Award Winning, New York Times Best Selling Author, Balls Ass Hot" Top Model be HOSTING?

    NEW YORK?

    VEGAS?

    PHIILY? not Alist worthy of your stature!

    Dubai?

    AC?

    LA?

    We can't wait to hear the amazing details.

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  9. I agree - Kade is aging terribly. In 7 months he's started to look like he's easily in his late 30s. As they say... cocaine, it's a hell of a drug.

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  10. ALL,

    ARTHUR IS AGING BECAUSE OF HIS LIFESTYLE. LIVING IN RON'S CLOSET AND BEING IN THE CLOSET AND DOING LOTS OF COKE AND EATING RESTAURANT FOOD WILL PUT THE OLD ON RIGHT AWAY. I LIVED A CLEAN LIFE WHICH IS WHY I GUESS YOU GUYS CALL ME NOSFERATU SOMETIMES--I HAVEN'T AGED NEARLY AS MUCH AS MY WORTHLESS WASTE OF CUMB SON, BUT I'M NO VAMPIRE. BUT THE WAY ARTHUR SUCKS IS GAYER THAN TWILIGHT.

    I WISH HE'D MAN UP AND ADMIT HE WAS GAY AND STOP WITH THIS FUCKTARDED HORSESHIT THAT JUST ALLOWS HIM TO SUBLIMATE WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON, BOTH HIS FAILURES AND HIS SEXUAL NATURE. DEEP DOWN HE KNOWS I HATE HIM ((ALONG WITH ANYONE ELSE WHO KNOWS HIM OR KNOWS ABOUT HIM)) AND THAT HE LOVES COCK BUT HE JUST CAN'T FACE IT.

    BUT I AM GLAD TO KNOW THAT RON KICKED HIM OUT. WITH ANY LUCK SOON HE'LL HAVE HIS MENTAL BREAKDOWN AND BE IN THE ASYLUM OR THE GRAVE AND I WON'T HAVE TO SUPPORT THE UNEMPLOYABLE FUCKFACED FAILURE.

    ARTHUR--IN CASE YOU'RE READING THIS: YOU'RE A NO-GOOD WORTHLESS WASTE OF CUMB FUCKFACED LOSER FAILURE.

    SINCERELY

    ARTHUR'S DAD.

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  11. PS--ARTHUR, ROLLING STONE ONLY DOES STUFF ABOUT SEAN JONES. NOT YOU. BECAUSE YOU'RE A FUCKING FAILURE THAT EVERYBODY HATES.

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  12. PPS--IF YOU WERE SERIOUS ABOUT BEING AN ACTOR YOU'D GO TO LA NOT STAY IN PHILLY YOU GODDAMNED RETARD. IT'S NOT LIKE YOU HAVE A LEASE YOU FUCKING WORTHLESS FAILURE.

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  13. PPPS--AND IT'S NOT LIKE YOU HAVE ANYTHING ELSE KEEPING YOU IN PHILLY EXCEPT YOUR COKE CONNECT. YOU SHOULD GO TO LA. GO TO LA. GO TO LA YOU FUCKING FAILURE!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!

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  14. PPPPS--OH WAIT I FORGOT. YOU HAVE A FEW ENABLERS IN PHILLY THAT HAVE KEPT YOU FROM HAVING A MENTAL BREAKDOWN SO FAR. IN LA YOU'D CRUMBLE IN AN INSTANT BECAUSE YOU'RE A DELUDED NO-GOOD WORTHLESS FAILURE WITH NO TALENT AND NO CHARM AND NO CHARISMA AND EVERYBODY HATES YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE A FUCKING ASSHOLE. AND DID I MENTION THAT YOU ARE A FAILURE? HAVE AN ANXIETY ATTACK AND DIE.

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  15. Zombie here-

    Arthur you greasy zit infested fuckface....

    You can't even speak without hurling slobber and gum (when your handlers give you some) out of your cocksmoker- how in hell are you going to win an award for acting? They don't have "best hurled drool in a dramatic role" categories, stupid shit.

    Nice try on covering up for getting launched from another so called friend's apartement- you are a caustic, noxious retard that obviously noone can stand being around for more than a couple weeks- with or without the protective asbestos gear.

    And the lame ass video of you looking for a new "casa creepeye" in a multimillion dollar condo? Pathetic, you fucking chimp- you have made roughly $400 bucks total as a punk ass extra, does servicing men in philly clubs really pay that much?

    Did they imagine you'd be joining their ranks as an acclaimed author so quickly? No, they did not as the only one "acclaiming" you as an author is well- you, dickhead.

    Halfwits that don't know the difference between "their" and "they're" are not authors. They're fucking retards. Shitstains that can't use quotation marks correctly are short bus riders, not writers.

    That describes you quite nicely, cockboy- a retarded short bus rider. Throw in a padded football helmet, a spork, and a stain resistant drool bib and we got you pretty much described to a T.

    Looking at you and your awful and hideous monkeyboy hooting and scurrying about, it occurs to me there should be a fifth rider of the apocalypse. It should be called Slobberus, and it should look just like you. Because you are such a spastic cloddish ape, Slobberus would not ride a fiery warhorse, but instead drive a bright yellow short bus with a pink flashing siren on top.

    May you fall from a great height- say from the balcony of a condo you will never be able to afford- and suffer a painful death.

    Eat shit, you flat dicked moron Kade.

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  16. Artshitz should be careful. Clients might sue him for being all coked up when he was at Ameriprise. Just look at me (link in name)!

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  17. Zombie kade, again-

    Leonard you are on fucking fire, yer killin' me over here.

    Well done, you old vampire.

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  18. Zombie, again-

    Is it just me, or does kadenstein (seasonal insult) have a groucho marx starter kit going with his moronic plucked eyebrows?

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  19. @kristen14i I am a fashion leader here so I wanted the city 2 b showcased w the brand

    --

    WTF @ that twitter???? Does Kade really believe that he's some kind of fashion leader? When he's not wearing stupid, juvenile slogan t-shirts, he's wearing stuff that doesn't look any different than anyone else. Oh, and the cheap fedoras, that he "brought back to being popular..." My ass!

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  20. Oh look, Ron Hansen got tired of Artshitz's slumming in his closet, and decided to throw the fucktard out.

    I hear there's an opening under one of the bridges near you, Artshitz. Better claim it, or the 'balls ass hot ass' homeless dude on the corner will get it first!

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  21. Sleepovers?

    Shades of Jacko?

    I can’t believe no one commented about that post from ‘Dawn’ (march, 2009) taken from sleepy eye creepy guy’s feedback section…

    “He ended up killing himself in a toilet related accident”. ?????????????????

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  22. The condos AK is looking at are SICK. I'll be living in one of them soon enough.

    Kudos, Kade!

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  23. Here's how much Hamlet is NOT American Literature, Arthur:
    1) Written by Shakespeare, a British playwright, not Mel Gibson, as you probably believe.
    2) Written by a British playwright, Hamlet is about a DANISH prince.
    3) Written by a British playwright, about a Danish prince, it was crafted somewhere between 1599 and 1601, some 175 years BEFORE the United States of America was FOUNDED.
    4) Hamlet not only predates American Literature, it predates AMERICA, you fucktard!

    And Trident Media turned me down? Arthur, just because you can walk into a bookstore in America and buy a book, doesn't make the BOOK "American Literature."

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  24. At least not EVERYONE in Philly is a talentless hack...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6ZI76XNKkk&feature=player_embedded

    Even being a Yankee fan I can appreciate this. Philly's going down, but Cock Gobbler just doesn't understand we're not just "haters" because, but rather because he truly sucks. Unlike the guy who did this song.

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  25. “Feeling 16 again”…but looking 45

    ‘Fortress of doucheadude’

    “Big news everyone, in keeping with my fashion forward trend setting balls ass kade style ‘the douche is loose’ brand (to give back to the Gen pop) I’ve decided to release my soon to be worn by everyone best selling kadenation “fedora made from my dads old suit and a hot glue gun”, which will put me next to Calvin Klein and other top designers like myself who probably will want me to be the top model in the world that starts and makes and models the #1 fedora’s made from recycled tweed like other famous Russian re-users of stuff that have the Greek-Italian look that we dominate world wide and in Paris besides being the best author and actor and ‘little yellow guy’ getter.”

    “Some people wear fedora’s, I fuck fedora’s”…Author (that’s a play on my name) Kego

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  26. Could someone post how to remove grease from a fedora (besides ‘take it off kegos head’)?

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  27. I have an insane (normal?) urge to grab both ends of that scarf he's wearing, and pull as friggin hard as I can.
    Didnt even bother to read the crap he wrote

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  28. I'm hoping Arthur can bring back and popularize the "PAPER HAT". Very Fashion forward, the "Biz" loves green issues and recycling!

    He would so rock that look!

    Any Photoshoppers out there??????????

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  29. Wow Arthur. So Ron threw you out, huh? Sad monkey - how will you ever rent a place...? No job, no prospects, no rental history - yeah, you are a rental agent's dream. And because you have no capacity to understand irony or subtlety, let me just say I was being sarcastic just now: you ARE NOT a rental agent's dream. You aren't ANYONE'S dream, you sad, delusional monkey.

    Heads up, though, Arthur... you are looking like MAJOR crap. Really bad. Is your skin turning GREY?! The video at 10 Rittenhouse (where you will never live, douche) you actually look homeless. WTF?! I used to be able to offer some suggestions (that you never took) like getting a facial and Botox, getting some serious moisturizer and help for the bags under your eyes… but wow. I just don’t even know what to say anymore. All the drugs, smoking, alcohol, lack of sleep and those crap supplements you take for the gym (where you never are, so why do you take them, anyway?) have taken your physical appearance to a bad, bad place monkey.

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  30. Kade is not listed on Trident Media Group's online client list: http://www.tridentmediagroup.com/clientlist.html#k ...maybe TMG simply hasn't updated their site but I expect Kade is just lying

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  31. Wait, did Artshitz SERIOUSLY throw 'The Notebook' in as literature? BAAHAAHAAHAAAAA!!!

    Geezus you sad clown-monkey, I always figured you were gay, but this totally outs you!

    You love Britney Spears, The Notebook, and Enrico Iglesias? Dude, just come out of the closet! You're not fooling anyone.

    Also, you look like a 50 y/o drag queen, especially in that scarf with that nasty, greasy hat on your head. Or should that be drag kween?

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  32. Sleepovers? I thought only 12 year old girls had those.

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  33. Arthur...you're pathetic.

    Those girls that were making out probably didn't even like making out with each other, they just wanted an excuse not to look at you and to demonstrate that they'd rather lez out than deal with your BS.

    Wasting some real estate agent's time to look at a place you'll never be able to afford so that you can make a sad little grandstand: pathetic.

    Borrowing a car from someone who's borrowing the car from someone else who's being generous enough to let others use it, and then mocking that person--very nice. Why don't you make fun of Ron for letting you crash while you're at it?

    You're just an insecure effeminate punk that tries harder to compensate than anyone I've ever seen.

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  34. She wakes up early every morning
    Just to do her hair now
    Because she cares yeah

    Her day wouldn't be right
    Without her make up
    She's never had a make up

    She's just like you and me
    But she's homeless, she's homeless
    As she stands there singing for money

    La da dee la dee da
    La da dee la dee da
    La da dee la dee da
    La da dee la dee da
    La da dee la dee da
    La da dee la dee da

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  35. Can someone PLEASE call or contact Trident Media Group by email to see if they know anything about Arthur? It shouldn't be too difficult to call them and see if they can issue a press release on a new author signing.

    (212) 262-4810

    gottlieb.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com; strone.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com; levine.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com; lallen@tridentmediagroup.com; carnicelli.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com; ecope@tridentmediagroup.com; mflashman@tridentmediagroup.com; aglass@tridentmediagroup.com; ahenkin@tridentmediagroup.com; ekellogg@tridentmediagroup.com; LJKDelphi@aol.com; smaclean@tridentmediagroup.com; amatsueva@tridentmediagroup.com; smiller@tridentmediagroup.com; jolivo@tridentmediagroup.com; aramirez@tridentmediagroup.com; roberts.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com; jsilbersack@tridentmediagroup.com; esilverman@tridentmediagroup.com; whalen.assistant@tridentmediagroup.com

    By the way... clickable email addresses at the link above in my name on Kade's site.

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  36. You dog dick haters,
    AK checks this site too... Talk about a distant fire of attention! No hits on his site? how many other sites are like this one? Mark my words this douche is jerkin the yamm to this comment board too!!


    When this fuckwipe becomes famous... And he will ! Some fuck producer is gonna sign this fuck and parade the antics like doofus Paris h .... There will be no stopping it!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Fuck you
    in the ass
    HARD!!


    Crappy

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  37. Anyone else see the parallels between The Banned and Ryan Howard from the Office?

    Ryan has a bit where he refers to a Scranton 8, but she'd be a NY 6

    Ryan also has a new love for a retarded looking fedora.

    He dyed his hair "blonde" and looked like crap.

    Was young and ran the company, which he got fired (Banned perhaps?)from and now is doing temp work.

    The more hateable they make Ryan, the more he reminds me of Kade.

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  38. I met BJ Novak last night, weird. He can actually play a douche on TV and seemed to be a really normal guy in public. Take notes Arthur.

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  39. I'm so jealous! I hear Novak is hilarious IRL. Smart too. Kade... not so much.

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  40. Maybe Kade is just playing a douche, like Novak. Kade might be a genius hard at work finishing his proof of existence and uniqueness for solutions to the 3D Navier-Stokes equations when he's not blobbing.

    But not bloody likely. I bet he's hoping that Boonswang will help him out by falsifying a document that purports to tell everybody that it was an act, a post-modernist meta whatever on American celebrity obsession. The sick thing is that Boonswang might just be a big enough fucktard to play along.

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  41. @ crappy…

    Would that make you a ‘dog dick’ lover?

    And just to set the record straight, you are wrong on every point…except that kego lurks like a bottom feeder that’s willing to graze through any amount of shit for a morsel of what he considers ‘fame’.

    When I say lurks I mean like a maggot.
    When I say fame I mean nothing, and that’s what he has…NOTHING (except unpleasant odors)
    When I say odors I mean you ‘crappy’

    You are the green pus on a dogs dick that even the dog doesn’t want to lick off. (Sorry everyone)

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  42. Boonswang…??

    Did you see the picture of him kiss lipped towards parturd? Guess he wanted to return the favor he just received. In any event, he and ‘Actnot the idiot’ behave like children…very misbehaved children.
    I (on the other hand), CAPT. CRUSHAKADE, cannot tolerate immaturity from grown men. After all…I am the ANTI-KADE. (I like girls)

    (I swear to God, if you don’t get satire, then the jokes on you)

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  43. This boonswang must be tough as hell. With that name he must have got his ass beat constantly. That or he just kept his head down and didn’t say anything. Probably the later (look who he hangs with)

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  44. Arthur,

    New York is good for stage acting and soap operas, but little else in the way of acting. LA handles all the rest, but it is so expensive and cut-throat that there are a few other places you might not have thought of as acting meccas to move to because, quite frankly, you have been too busy.

    First is Toronto Canada. That is where a huge number of our TV shows and movies are filmed! Suprising huh? No, it's true. It is because production costs are so much cheaper up there. I think it is because they don't have to use union workers (sets, gaffers, etc). They film so much there that is it called 'Second Hollywood'. (It's Imdb page link in my name...yes cities get imdb pages, and Toronto's is over 18 pages of TV alone)

    Another place to move where they are non-stop filming, and they pay BIGGG is Japan. They would love you. You are just their kind of guy. I can see you having your own show and I can see you being made into Anime. Think of the hot asian chicks!! Geisha style kade style. And the fashion, just like yours among a lot of the hot young guys. Anything you want is there and I mean ANYTHING. Wink wink nudge nudge.

    And don't forget about New Zealand, the best place for you to shine. That is where they filmed the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, and where they are now filming almost every show that needs a lot of outside scenery. That is where the hot and buff film their series. Think of Kevin Sorbo "hunky Herculese" and Lucy Lawless "zounds! Xena" Everyone is active and tan, healthy and glowing and the amounts of 9's and 10's is flabbergasting. Imagine having a mansion on the side of a mountain with a 200 foot waterfall as your 'view' and a helipad on the roof for when you really need to get to the set on time. For a long but incomplete list of movies filmed there go to: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_New_Zealand_films
    You will become a film actor in no time at all. Hello little oscar!

    Please, consider these as alternatives to the tired old American haunts that are already full to the gills and deals are made and broken in a heart-beat. America is too crowded for the kind of vision and uniqueness that you have, it would never appreciate you like those other places would and will only slow down the pace of The Journey. (which I am sure you have noticed already, it is fast but not fast enough to have an oscar in 2.3457 years.)

    signed,
    an American who thinks moving is a brilliant idea

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  45. I never heard the term Gen pop before and I googled it and came up with zero hits. What is it and where did he pull it out of?

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  46. I think "Gen Pop" is from the HBO show Oz.

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  47. @Anon 1:28 PM,

    The haters were and always will be the star of the show, take us away and you've just got some acne-ridden manchild who thinks they can act.

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  48. @ Eli Manning, Kade abbreviates anything he is to lazy to keep typing out in full. Gen Pop is short for General Population, meaning the the little people he is too good for, and that he wishes actually didn't exist.

    @ anon 11:57 Kade already does too MUCH botox. It has rendered his ability to show emotion useless. Even when he gets mad a la Trent Da Vinci, most of his face never moves.

    @anon 12:12 IMG doesn't show him as a client either. He is only in the preliminary stages with both. The writing he is doing now is probably just an outline and few chapters to give to the agent so they can see his style and the books potential. (the book thing will soon never be spoken of again)

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  49. @ I'm Rx2

    SHHHHH! Fuck dude! Don't mention Toronto! This is a nice town, the last thing we need is another quasi-faggot guido cokehead poisoning the atmosphere and degrading the nightlife (ah! who am I kidding; 'the scene' here has sucked ass since '97)
    Oh and the unions do have things locked up pretty tight here, it's the exchange rates that make shooting here cheaper.

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  50. Arthur, on second thought, cross Toronto off that list. They film there incessantly but there is no nightlife and you would wither and die there not being able to hang out in exclusive VIP hot spots. I still think you should seriously consider New Zealand. I can even see them making you president.

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  51. Where is this Kadealot he keeps mentioning? Is it some imaginary place where everybody DOESN'T think he's a worthless fucking douchebag?

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  52. @ Rx2

    "Even when he gets mad a la Trent DaVinci, most of his face never moves."

    Ha! That made my large African lungs laugh so hard, I startled all the antelope!

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  53. Whatever happened to the legal action that so and so was threatening against this site known as "Act 1"

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  54. Didn't 4chan make that go away?

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  55. I think his hard partying wannabe ways have caught up with him.

    He looks pretty drunk/red faced/tired in almost every single photograph.

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  56. ARTHUR,

    YOU'RE AN OLD-LOOKING IMMATURE FUCKTARDED FAILURE. YOU LOOK 40 AND ACT 15. EVERYBODY HATES YOU. NOBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOU EXCEPT TO MAKE FUN OF YOU ON A BLOB THAT ISN'T EVEN YOURS. LOOK AT THE COMMENTS HERE AND LOOK AT THE COMMENTS ON YOUR BLOB. THE FEW PEOPLE THAT AREN'T YOUR ENABLING SO-CALLED """FRIENDS""" THAT REALLY CARE WHETHER YOU'D SUCCEED OR FAIL ARE ALL HERE AND THEY ALL KNOW ((NOT HOPE)) YOU'LL FAIL. BECAUSE YOU'RE A NO-GOOD WORTHLESS WASTE OF CUMB FAILURE. YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN A FAILURE AND YOU ALWAYS WILL BE. YOU MIDAS WILL KILL YOURSELF YOU GODDAMNED WEAK PATHETIC FREAK.

    SINCERELY

    YOUR DAD.

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  57. PS--I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS, ARTHUR. BECAUSE YOU'RE A SELF-OBSESSED INSECURE LITTLE FUCK JUST LIKE YOU ALWAYS WERE. YOU WANT TO PROVE TO ME AND EVERYONE ELSE THAT YOU'RE WORTH SOMETHING AND ANY LITTLE BIT OF EVIDENCE THAT SOMEONE CARES WILL HELP IN YOUR EYES BECAUSE YOU'RE A DELUDED FUCKTARD. BUT I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU. YOU'RE WORTHLESS. I'VE ALWAYS HATED YOU AND ALWAYS WISHED I'D ABORTED YOU AND I ALWAYS WILL. HAVE AN ANXIETY ATTACK AND DIE.

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  58. PPS--I'M PRETTY SURE YOUR MOTHER MARINA FUCKING HATES YOU TOO, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH. IF SHE WERE ALIVE YOUR GRANDMOTHER WOULD SPIT IN YOUR FUCKING FACE BECAUSE YOU'RE SUCH A DISGRACE. BUT I'D BE THE FIRST TO TELL HER YOU'VE GOT ENOUGH CUMB-LOOKING SPIT IN THE CORNERS OF THAT DISGUSTING LISPY MOUTH.

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  59. @ Kent…

    You know, a real BFF would offer the actornot to co-hab in KA, at least until the biz comes to their senses.
    And create a balls ass cartoon featuring the brand, so the ‘kids of kadenation’ could witness ‘the journey’ ‘kade style’ in a familiar format. Maybe call it ‘kade out’.
    Yep, that’s what a real BFF would do…

    ReplyDelete
  60. ALL,

    I WANT YOU TO KNOW ARTHUR WASN'T MY FAULT. I DIDN'T HAVE THE HEART, FORESIGHT, OR BALLS TO ABORT HIM BUT FUCK IF I KNEW WHAT HE'D TURN INTO. PLEASE DON'T HOLD HIM AGAINST ME. I'M REALLY NOT THAT BAD A GUY AND I JUST WANT TO BE ABLE TO WALK DOWN THE STREET IN PHILLY WITH MY HEAD HELD HIGH AND NOT MOCKED OR BERATED ON ACCOUNT OF MY PATHETIC DISGUSTING WEAK WORTHLESS WASTE OF CUMB FAILURE SON. I WANT THE SAME THING ALL OF YOU WANT: FOR ARTHUR TO BE IN AN ASYLUM OR A GRAVE. WHEN IT HAPPENS I PROMISE I'LL CELEBRATE AND GIVE OUT FREE VODKA AND ABORTIONS AT THE SALON.

    SINCERELY

    ARTHUR'S DAD.

    ReplyDelete
  61. So does Arthur live with his parents now?

    ReplyDelete
  62. I think he looks older because the Botox has worn off (he got some injections earlier this year). I bet he can't afford to get a new treatment.

    ReplyDelete
  63. ANONYMOUS @ 8:10,

    FUCK YOU!

    SINCERELY

    ARTHUR'S DAD.

    ReplyDelete
  64. @ Leonard…

    Maybe you could convince actornot to go stay with babushka, just like the good old days. I’ve heard he has a BFF out in KA, maybe he would put the crisco kid up until…until…well, maybe he would put him up…I mean give him a place to stay with him. He even has a job. It’s worth a try, after all, he’s his BFF in Kali.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Hey Dad,

    You still down for that threesome later on with your cumdumpster and your favorite cumgargling son? I hope you're not too "rusty" at giving abortions anymore because little Kade has trouble filling out a condom!

    Kade Out

    ReplyDelete
  66. Also dad, that ottoman in the living room, I think someone stole it. Lindsay Furman saw the guy take it, but can't remember what he looks like because her memory's a little leaky these days.

    Kade Out

    ReplyDelete
  67. @ crappy…

    Keep your head down, Dog Dick Licker and Actnot’s Ass Kisser.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Leaky memory, she better plug it up

    ReplyDelete
  69. ALL,

    I SOMEHOW HAD DINNER WITH THE LITTLE FUCKFACE AND NOW I CAN'T SLEEP. I'VE TRIED SHOWERING AND IT DOESN'T WIPE OFF THE SHAME AND THE SELF-LOATHING I FEEL AFTER DEALING WITH THAT WASTE OF CUMB FAILURE ARTHUR. BUT THAT SELF-LOATHING IS NOTHING COMPARED TO THE LOATHING I FEEL FOR MY PATHETIC WEAK WORTHLESS FAILURE SON. HE'S GOING TO POST VIDEOS OF ME AGAIN AND I HATE THAT HORSESHIT. I HATE HIM AND I KEEP TRYING TO LET HIM KNOW THAT SUBTLY BECAUSE I ALWAYS SEEM TO CHICKEN OUT WHEN I ACTUALLY SEE HIS GREASY FACE. I FUCKING HATE MYSELF FOR THAT BUT WHAT CAN I DO? HE MAY LOOK 40 BUT I'M AN OLD MAN. SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME ESCAPE THE HELL THAT I'M IN.

    SINCERELY

    ARTHUR'S DAD.

    ReplyDelete
  70. TO THE FAKE ARTHUR @ 8:43,

    FUCK YOU. YOU'RE DISGUSTING AND I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU, LET ALONE BANG A BROAD ALONG WITH YOU. YOU SICK FUCK. WHO RAISED YOU? OH YEAH IT WAS YOUR CUNT GRANDMOTHER, THAT'S WHY YOU TURNED OUT SO GODDAMNED BROKEN: BECAUSE SHE WARPED YOUR FUCKTARDED FEEBLE LITTLE MIND.

    AND ANOTHER THING: I DON'T WANT TO TOUCH THAT USED PIECE OF FURNITURE FOR A WIFE. SHE NEEDS TO BE REPLACED. BUT IF YOU GAVE MY A CRACK AT KANG OR TAMBURINO OR FURMAN I'D GIVE THEM ALL NOSE BLEEDS. NOT OUT OF PASSION SO MUCH AS FRUSTRATED RAGE AT YOU, AND AT THEM FOR ENABLING YOUR FUCKTARDED HORSESHIT, YOU GODDAMNED WORTHLESS WASTE OF CUMB FAILURE FREAK.

    SINCERELY

    THE REAL ARTHUR'S REAL DAD.

    ReplyDelete
  71. @ Kudos

    my den doesn't have privacy shades.

    i like the cartoon idea. i think it should star Arthur and Leonard. it could be like an animated "You Again." we'd have to get Zombie in there somehow.

    ReplyDelete