Retardation Strikes Again: "The Next Vince Vaughn"

Our lisping, closeted homosexual hero has done it again... a purely delusional post of the first magnitude:
-------------------------
Certain actors are famous and amazing as just being 80% themselves, and then use the other 20% to adapt it to the character that they want to become so they are really always the same person, but giving some spice to create something new (Nicholson, Bogart, Brosnan, Ford), while others just “Disappear” into a new character and totally become someone else to the point that you forget that you are watching the actual actor (Oldman, Day-Lewis, Ledger) and the beauty of My Craft is that that is what makes it art. I am being told by everyone in “The Biz” that I have such a unique and different sense of being, that I will probably find my niche more in the first group, because as one person said, “Why run away from what works, and you work”, so I am really trying to find where my niche is going to be and where I am going to win my awards and make my millions. I am always the most funny and witty person in any room, so I wanted to begin training around comedy (my comedic timing is superior to most comics already, it’s just a matter of massaging my acting muscles through repetition to get them used to the various motions that are needed to hit the points so that the crowd erupts when I am finished at certain points with laughter).

The month of September is filled with so many classes and amazing workshops that I feel like my mastering of the craft is about to go to it’s highest level, and with everything that is happening in “The Journey”, I want to be ready because I have a meeting with a top area agent set up, and will be auditioning in front of the casting directors for shows like 30 Rock and others in September (I also will be starting Mike Lemon’s Advanced Film Class ((His top level Film Class)), a class in NYC with Jennifer Rudolph who works with the top agents and casting directors in “The Biz”, and an Improv class at the Walnut Street Theatre), and feel that if I put my best foot forward, I may get cast as a SAG principal based on my talent and looks, and I think my chemistry with fellow actors Tina (Tina Fey) and Alec (Alec Baldwin) would be “Off the Charts”, and could take an already hit show to a new level (The addition of The Brand with my fan following, recognizability, and popularity , and probably get me my own sitcom like Seinfeld or Curb your Enthusiasm, which will eventually lead me into huge movie roles to bring home “Little Oscar”.

While talking to a friend on the way home from NYC yesterday (By the Way, I have that second read with the cast of that pilot tomorrow, and hopefully will be cast to film it so wish me luck), she said “I heard people are calling you something like the next Vince Vaughn” (Because I have such a dry, quick, Jewish humor, and am tall, controversial, and striking, although everyone in The Entourage agrees that I am superior looking and have more personality), so in my session with Sharon today, I picked a comedic monologue that I can go to war with which will showcase my range against “Greed is Good” and will display how well rounded I have become as an acting prodigy and that I am not just a one trick pony like Jack or Pierce, and potentially put me, Arthur Kade, into a class of his own. I selected a monologue to learn from “Wedding Crashers”, and Sharon and I spent an hour breaking it down, identifying where I would spit it out hard, and where I would keep it soft, and those peaks and valleys are what determine the rhythm of the speech to crate True Comedy. This the read after we practiced all session, and I will memorize it for next week and I think you will agree that I am hilarious and for a first break down, I nailed it “Kade Style”.

What a rambling piece of shit post... have at it in the comments!