11/27/09

Fan Mail From The U.K. (United Kadeom)


He. Brags. About. Almost. Sex. He also gets an e-mail from someone claiming to be from Oxford University who doesn't know the difference between YOUR and YOU'RE. Arthur Kadyshes is a real moron with no ability to differentiate between reality and fantasy, but we already knew this. God I hope he OD's this weekend. More bullshit from fin faced walking Ipecac, Arthur "rhymes with radishes" Kadyshes...

When you’re building an amazing “Global” influence like The Brand, you receive emails from around the planet, and it’s funny to see how HUGE Arthur Kade is getting in the U.K..(It’s incredible to know that many of the best actors are imported from the U.K, and the fact that I have built such a tremendous following there tells me that not only are my acting skills at almost Oscar level like some of their best like Hopkins, Thompson, and Olivier, but they appreciate the ushering in of “The Modern Actor”, and the “Kade Style” lifestyle I have developed while becoming a “Living Legend”), and I wanted to showcase a couple emails that I have received from The U.K., and prestigious universities like Oxford who absolutely worship “The Journey”. I also just booked an enormous audition that I will blog shortly, and the various lessons that I will be doing to prepare for it.  I have also included an email from a Kade Nation Member from outside Harrisburg, PA asking me for restaurant advice and I am answering it.
1) “greetings mr kade from northampton england! Just wanted to drop you a line to say i love the blog! Read it every day at work to get me through the boredom, and it always makes me laugh! Keep up the good work! There’s even a low but audible Kade buzz over here in the Uk now. You should totally come over here and turn the uk into the UKADE. anyway, i know you’re a busy man. Keep chasing the dream arthur. A man who doesn’t dream is not a man at all- if thats true, then you’re one hell of a man. All the best, Paddy.”
2)”hi arthur,
im writing from oxford university england, where your picking up a strong following. You really are global man! We love your work and the way you really LIVE and LOVE ‘the journey’. Will your new book be available in the uk or will we have to order a copy from the states.
peace and love man
kade-out”

3)Hi Arthur:
I need you to please tell me a really hot, upscale place to eat in Philadelphia, no sushi.  I love your blog and I totally trust your taste. Forever a fan of yours,
Jessica
Answer:
1) Buddakan (Asian Fusion)-my favorite restaurant in the city because the drinks are great, there usually some 20-25 year old Philly 9’s who if you buy a drink and show some charm, they may go in the bathroom and provide great oral sex, and the food is hot Asian Fusion, and the atmosphere and environment is very “Kadeish”.

2) Tinto (Tapas)-Amazing Tapas, and it is right off Rittenhouse so after you are done you can walk over to G Lounge and watch The Brand with some crazy ass all over him, and even buy him and The Entourage a drink or two to say thank you.  Atmosphere is very trendy, and I have been told that everybody there is a fan of “The Journey”, so you might want to mention your Kade Nation, and they might hook you up with extra food or alcohol.
3) El Vez (Mexican)-More of a younger crowd with good Mexican Food, and I will never forget when I went there with a girl after finishing class and we walked down to the bathrooms, and started making out and when she felt the bulge in my pants, I thought she may cum standing up because she told me that her boyfriend and her didn’t have much sex anymore.  It was so passionate, and then we killed Rosa Lunas to celebrate the night of almost sex we had.
4) Parc (French Bistro)-Right on the square, it is very similar to Pastis in NYC, and I would recommend the roasted chicken and escargot.  The Atmosphere is very NYC, and you can easily run into a celeb along the levels of Bruce Willis, Owen Wilson, Arthur Kade, and even Jack Nicholson.  It’s not as trendy, but a very solid choice, and you will easily run into coin chasing Cougars who are all looking for Ballers like The Brand and The Entourage, so be careful if you have a man that is horny and you’re giving him great sex.
By the way, if you are a Philly 9 or higher, then email me, and either I or one of my friends can make sure you have some fun, but I don’t think I have ever encountered a girl from that part of the state who is hot, so don’t bother if you’re not.
“Arthur Kade writes it.  They Hate it.  We Live It”…Arthur Kade…11/27/09

21 comments:

  1. Thanks to Kudos for discovering that "Paddy" means wanker/jerk-off/someone with a small dick

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  2. I was about to put this in the last post, here goes anyway…

    Jumping ahead here: Sir Lispalot is bonding with England and post’s some fan mail from The Ukade…The first one ends calling him ‘Paddy’. Sooooo, I looked it up on Urban Dictionary…

    # 17

    Paddy now means…

    1) offensive slang for a gay person
    2) a wank
    3) a very small penis

    Usage…

    1) Shut up you stupid paddy
    2) he’s just had a paddy in the loo
    3) god he’s got a paddy

    They get him every time.

    They shoot horse’s that aren’t nearly as crippled as klispy ‘almost sex’ cumbfuck.

    Love you 2 Radda

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  3. What Philly 9 wants to be with a guy in an unfurnished apartment with a bed on the floor? Speaking of not hot, have you looked in a mirror lately?

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  4. “When most gen pop put their foot in their mouth, Arthur Kade puts their dick in his mouth” Hanus Kanus 11/27/2009

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  5. Alright Art another great week, I believe you got drunk seven out seven nights, classy.

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  6. LMcSF-couldn't help but think of you when reading the NYT this morning. Article entitled, 'For Some, a Search for Celebrity is Worth Any Risk.' Profiles the types of people that sneak into the White House, stage fake emergencies involving their children or blow up their marriage - 'for something as mundane and flimsy as media attention.'

    Pick the parts that apply to you best:
    '...fame turned some people crazy and some crazy people sought fame.'
    While you associate yourself with Olivier, the MSM finds you more the Mark David Chapman type.

    'Even bad...behavior has its own reality niche.'
    Real groundbreaking stuff you're working on - playing the douche to become infamous.

    But my personal favorite:
    'Reality television didn't create a new psychiatric illness, but it did give a platform to the nutty and marginally disturbed.'

    Now go tell everyone how there was a NYT article about you('probably in anticipation of my Bestseller').

    My son called while changing planes to visit for the holidays and said, 'I'm in the Philly airport. If I see Arthur Kade, I'm going to smack him.'
    Proudest. Moment. Ever.

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  7. I guess we should all "step up" and start sending Arthur "fan Mail" from all over the Globe and Galaxy.

    I've heard people on the "International Space Station" are huge fans!

    What is this mysterious email address that only the purest Kade Fans seem to have?

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  8. “What is this mysterious email address…?”

    No mystery

    At the top of his home page there’s a ‘contact me’ button. Email, twitter, etc.

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  9. Arthur signed that letter "paddy" because he's still in a huff after the bad mouthing he got from Stephen Ward. Arthur has said that he never acknowledges "haters" but then he writes a whole post about the shit that got talked on him. It is a sign that he is super frustrated right now. With no acting work, with no furniture, with nothing happening at all his plans have gone to shit and it's just a matter of time till he is finished.

    Shrink

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  10. Where was he badmouthed by Steven Ward? Was this recent?

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  11. Welcome to Kadealot, guys!

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  12. Welcome to fail, Arthur.

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  13. Steve – Steve – Steve – Steve – Steve - Steve

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  14. Steven Ward is a giant douche. But he is an Earth to the Sun of all douches, Arthur Kade. And his belittling Arthur makes him barely tolerable. His show really sucks though.

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  15. this guy is SUCH a loser its maddening

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  16. I wrote a short snuff film for Radishes Kadishes to star in. Arthur needs to act like a drunk, lisping, dumb version of Frank Stallone and it takes place in a shithole bar in a shithole city.

    Arthur approaches girl in bar

    "Hey you, Philly 7.5 want to touch my package?"

    BLAMMM!

    Fin

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  17. @Anon 7:13

    Wow! Arthur's perfect for that. He's been trying out for it every night!

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  18. I give up posting on shithead's blog. He keeps deleting my posts. Fucking faggot. Why won't the pile of shit kill himself? He's gotten completely delusional.

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  19. I think the fake emails that Kade sends to himself should be called "Fail mail" instead of "Fan mail".

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