With A Little Training, Kade Says He Can Knock Out Any Boxer Unless They Are Top Rated

If Arthur Kade really "depends" on his looks, don't you think he would do something about improving them? His face looks like old shoe leather, his lips are bloody and chapped, he typically looks exhausted, his hair is either "lego hair" or some variation of a hideous afro, he chews his fingernails until they bleed, and he has a nose that is asymetrical and could fit rolls of quarters inside each nostril.  Maybe getting punched in the face numerous times could actually repair that mess he calls a face.

The latest from the king of dumbination, arthurkade.com:
Even at the advanced age of 31, I am still an amazing athlete, that can excel in any sport at a high level, and out-workout almost any person I know. Everyone who has been following “The Journey” since it’s inception has seen the various workout routines and boxing videos that I have put up, and people have commented on how huge my arms are, and that I can generate a ton of power when punching. My hand speed is also still tremendous because I trained them for years to play basketball, and release my “Radar-Like” Shot super quickly on anyone. Even though I am not in the shape that shows my amazing physique right now, I have dropped my body fat from 10.6 percent to 8.4 percent in the last 2 weeks (I will update my Pictures next week and I’m sure everyone will be blown away by the “Kade Style” transformation my body is going through), and if I train, I can knock pretty much anyone out who is not a top ranked Pro Boxer like Oscar, Bernard, Floyd, or Vladimir.
I have been approached about fighting in a celebrity boxing match by Damon Feldman (He’s the creator and owner of Celebrity Boxing, and the business is growing by leaps and bounds, and he has tremendous exposure to all types of media, agents, and PR) to fight on his next card, but I am a bit hesitant about doing it because I am not sure how it will reflect on “The Journey”, and if the top people in “The Biz” who see me as a rising superstar will feel it is a great move for my career. My goal is winning my “Little Oscar”, and other awards like Emmys, and I would be cool getting a Golden Globe as well, and I want “The Biz” to not look at me as an athletic sideshow as opposed to a legitimate actor.
I am also nervous about getting punched in the face because I depend on my looks and features for the future millions that will be made, as well as hurting the opponent badly (I don’t remember the last time I have lost a fight, and I have never been really hurt by anyone), and will potentially knocking someone out hurt me psychologically like it has other fighters that have hurt or killed their opponents. If I do this, chances are I will dominate the opponent “Kade Style”, and will I beat them up so bad that I ruin their careers, or image, and is that something I want on my resume. The up side is that I can select gorgeous 9’s and 10’s to help me train in my camp and be in “Kade’s Corner”, and casting directors may see my skills and cast me in athletic roles that they didn’t see me in before, as well as girls will look at me like a “Tough Guy”, and it will add to my already growing “Bad Boy” image in “The Biz”, and further rip my body down to the point where I can be considered for roles against guys like Channing Tatum in movies like G.I. Joe (Many people in “The Biz” said they could see me as a leader in a War Movie like Saving Private Ryan or Braveheart, and I think with my hardships growing up, I could nail a role like that). I never want people in “The Biz” to not take me seriously, so I am careful about career and publicity choices.
I would love to hear what my fans around the world think about this, and your feedback will help me make a choice if this is something that you believe will help take The Brand and “The Journey” to another cultural mecca and turn me into a “Muhammad Ali like” Cultural figure, or is it not the right choice and decline. Let me know your thoughts?
“Being a Leader is giving people a reason to follow you, and then being willing to die for your cause, or being smart enough to buy your way out of it”….Arthur Kade…09/04/09

Our thoughts: We would LOVE to see Arthur in a boxing match! For a person who uses full-sized gloves on a speed bag (see video below to see his "expert" boxing skills, we're thinking Arthur might show up wearing scuba flippers on his hands and try to out-slap whoever he fights.


  1. Medium African ChildSeptember 4, 2009 at 1:25 PM

    Dear Father Arthur

    Big African Chief ask me write you and say that you come to Medium African Child village and fight boxing match in jungle. He say we call it Fumble in the Jungle, after your legendary boxing skills.

    Maybe we gets Ali and Nelson Mandela to comes and maybe throw in animal fight too. It would be good to see you wrestles with elephants and hippotamus and beat them down Kade style because you float like money, sting like giraffe.

    I am praying everyday to God for you and hope you is well Father Arthur, because frankly in your last post you seem a little crazy.

    Much love,

    Medium African Child

  2. check out this---Ace & TJ were mocking Kade after he got off the show. They made fun of him on their website.... http://www.acetj.com/videos/player.php?mediaID=3137

  3. Anonymous 1:26 - can you please reply with the link in your name? Thanks!

  4. Danny Bonaduce would wreck you.
    You should DEFINITELY do this and make sure you box Danny AND make sure he sees this video before you do, Cock Gobbler.

  5. I would LOVE to see him hurt that precious nose of his ''Kade Style''...

  6. the link to them bashing them is in my name.

    Kade would get rocked by ANYONE half decent in boxing, btw.

  7. What's with the consistent "31 is advanced age" thing? 31 is less than halfway to the average human lifespan in the United States, which is approximately 75 years.

    Maybe 31 is an advanced age for a repulsive loser such as Kade. Maybe he comes from another bloodline altogether? With any luck his species only lives to mid 30s and will soon die out.

  8. Kade always used to talk about how YOUNG he looks and how he would be YOUNG HOLLYWOOD and how he'd replace Brad Pitt, etc, etc. He used to lie on his blog that he was in his "mid 20s". Then it turns out that he's 31 and will be 32 this yr.

    LOL, truly pathetic stuff.

  9. Still on the basketball thing, I see.

    Kade - $500 says you can't go better than 7 of 10 from the line. I'd love to see that video. You'd spend weeks doing retakes to get it right.

  10. I'm racking my brain, but I can't think of anything more pathetic that I've seen recently. Kade should kill himself.

  11. Kade also said that "people were coming up to him and telling him he looked like he was in his early 20s" after the Botox on his forehead. Such dumb lies! He thinks it would help him get under 25 roles! LOL!

    He also referred to Botox as "a plastic surgery appointment." MORE LOL!

  12. Oh dear

    Oh dear

    Oh dear

    Please, for the love of God, DO IT! I think it would be all out Christmasses come at once!!

  13. *our

    Kade moment guys, sorry....

  14. *sigh* Kade getting the living shit beat out of him... On video so I can watch it.

    Now I have something to pray hard about in church this Sunday.

  15. I would pay to see it. It would be the only Kade "project" I would pay money to see.

  16. simply cartoonish

  17. I remember a story about a PRO FOOTBALL PLAYER (not some delusional ass-wipe living in Philly) who was thinking of getting into boxing. He was talking to Muhammad Ali about this and Ali reached out and smacked him in the face THREE TIMES before the guy had a chance to react. He said that was the last time he ever thought of becoming a boxer. That's coming from a PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE who has to react quickly in a game where if you lose a step you get cut. So Kade saying he could beat anyone who isn't Top Ranked is so much bullshit it makes my head explode. If you gave Cock Gobbler a bat with nails in it I still bet Bonaduce would kick the living shit out of him. Oh, and that would be if Bonaduce was forced to fight with a blindfold on also.

  18. That was presumably big mouthed 70s Cassius Clay as opposed to spit in a cup bobblhead 00s Cassius Clay.

    Where are the big revelations on this blog? Wasn't there going to be the BIG REVEAL about something to with Arthur Kade?

    Increasingly this blog is looking like a jilted gay lover spewing hate with some funny (and a lot of not at all funny quite disturbing) commentators. Although more or less just the same four commentators over and over again.

    Still waiting for the killer strike against the object of your destructive impulses. Without that, this blog really is just... every bit as creepy as you accuse Arthur Kade of being.


  19. "I don't even have to look!"
    "Oh fuck."
    "I don't even have to look!"
    "Oh, I am a complete twat. Why did I put this 24-carat FAIL video on my blog? Because I'm a fucking retard!"

    Is there a pro-celebrity rape circuit? Kade and his daddy would balls-ass DOMINATE that!


  20. “I don’t remember the last time I lost a fight”… That’s because you’ve never been in a fight dickweed. Running down the street and yelling “you pussy” once you think your close enough to your house is not being in a fight. You’ve never fought anyone, you’ve always been a wus. You don’t have heart, you don’t have balance and you sure as fuck don’t have style. The “bag” doesn’t hit you back asshole. Tonya Harding would whip your ass. Gary Coleman can beat you down. You’ve never fought anyone, you’re a pussy. Your fucking hair wouldn’t look so gross if you bathed once in awhile you sick crippled bitch. Dumb fuck you are.

  21. And pan face saline Kween,
    Do you show your parents artie’s/monkey boy blog? Do you? Of course not. Why not? Cause you know what vile shit it is and you’d be ashamed. And $7000.00 for fake ugly tits? Get the fuck out hooker.
    Shut the fuck up. Until you learn how to use prepositions and phrases correctly just shut the fuck up. How come you don’t read about your monkey on the radio? (and thats all you do, is read.) Your nothing but a puppet, stealing other (talented) peoples efforts, that pretends. You wouldn’t last one minute if you had to be spontaneous on the air. You pretentious bitch w/Lego tits. Leash your monkey, and shave your monkey.

  22. Kade is getting really boring these days. Stuff that would've been funny to me a while back is just boring now. zzzzzzzzzzz

  23. A Kade twitter: "I love whn grls r telepathically fighting over me"

    This has so many levels of weird, I don't even know where to start......

  24. I would love to see Kade get his ass kicked all over the place in a boxing ring. Of, course it will never happen, because he is too much of a chicken shit to do it.